DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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 Posted:
Dec 31, 2013 - 12:12 |
 
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Welcome to the Warhammerers Social Club and their affiliate, Warhammerers Juniors thread!
WARHAMMERERS SOCIAL CLUB TEAM PAGE
Here you will find the history, player bios and match reports of the cheating, fouling, merry bunch of Dwarven psychos that make up this memorable outfit. Devoted to the spirit of the awe-inspiring Dwarf Warhammerers, the Warhammerers Social Club are seeking to remind the Box and the world of the most exciting, crowd pleasing Dwarf side of them all! No foul will be too dirty, no pass too outlandish and if we can fit in a chainsaw, deathroller or two, you can be sure it will be drafted in. Who needs 11 on the pitch anyway? The opposition sure won't have 'em!
| Quote: | *** Did you know.......
Each year without fail on the 3rd day after Mitterfruhl, the NAF release their annual rulebook. This isn't a big event for most teams, in fact if questioned, most players would be totally oblivious to the date. However there are 2 teams, who do eagerly await this event, and read the 11,245 page tome (11,246 if you include the Commissioner's message) from cover to cover.
The first are the Heroes of Law; a finer bunch of gentlemen you are unlikely ever meet. Whose hearts are so pure, you have to wonder why they are in this game. As part of the training, each team member reads this 120lb criminal use of a tree, as part of his daily rituals.The other (unfortunately), are the Dwarf Warhammerers...
Where as the Heroes study the over-sized door stop to protect their honour and defend their virtues, the Hammerers eagerly await the annual for well........less scrupulous reasons, far far less scrupulous.
Two elite teams are set to task on the book, armed with rulers and fluorescent high lighting wands. The first is a crack team of Lawyer-sage. It is their job to find loopholes, typos and blunders. The second are Finance-smiths, who are given the immensely difficult project of trying to predict the up and coming season losses; due to fines, suspensions (and in extreme but more and more common) bail fees!
What happens to the books after the sages and smiths have finished leafing through the pages, you may ask? Well, the Warhammerers' Social Club bars are notoriously high. This can be somewhat problematic for the short of stature (and temper) membership. Old, vintage editions placed at the bar, come in very handy for the not so sober patrons getting in the rounds. Do they ever look down at the artificial step below their iron toe-capped groin kicking boots and pick one up to read? Sure they do, just as bricks can swim!
Famed Bloodbowl Historian - Harvestmouse |
WARHAMMERERS JUNIORS TEAM PAGE
As for the Warhammerers Juniors, the Warhammerers Social Club (in their beer addled wisdom) determined that the best thing for the club would be a steady influx of young and determined (not to mention "uniquely minded") players into a new youth program where these rebellious young'uns could learn the proper Warhammerers style!! So, the Stunty Leeg will also begin to see a steadily rising bending of the rules allied with some healthy days ahead for the Apothecary sector!
So stay tuned! And we hope you enjoy the journey as much as we enjoy creating it! |
Last edited by DrPoods on %b %03, %2014 - %10:%Jan; edited 2 times in total |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Jan 03, 2014 - 06:19 |
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MATCH INFORMATION
Warhammerers Social Club 0-1 Grudge Brothers
A bit of Dwarf on Dwarf for the debut of the Warhammerers Social Club. Sadly, we had a 1-0 loss but we had chances to score. Anyway, plenty of mayhem and some nice SPP. Plenty of fouling and action in this one and I am happy with the game. Just some mistakes to iron out. Still, 2 CAS to 0 is always pleasant! Dornier Schmidt had two completions, skilled up and took Strong Arm as a first skill. Gegrak Blackaxe and Gilam Bokker opened the CAS account for the WSC!
Sadly though, twice when within range of scoring, the lads just couldn't help themselves and relied on their vicious brethren to damage anyone capable of pursuit. This didn't pay off although on another day anything could have happened.
Harsh words were also spoken in the dressing room where Coach Poods was heard to loudly berate his team for their lack of perceived effort.
"What the hell is that? Only two fouls? What are ya the smegging Dwarf Giants? The accursed bloody, hoity toidy, do gooding pack of stinking virtue The Heroes of Law??!??! Pull yer damned fingers out!". By all accounts, players and management are most pleased with Coach Poods' attitude and are hoping for a more successfully violent outing in future matches. |
Last edited by DrPoods on %b %03, %2014 - %10:%Jan; edited 2 times in total |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Jan 03, 2014 - 06:30 |
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MATCH INFORMATION
Warhammerers Social Club 0-2 Warpfire Scramblers
Well, we came to the game ready to play and the first two turns saw Bardrek Granitecracker rolling his way down the pitch trying to get some pesky rats off the pitch early. Things started to go bad in turn 3 when Dornier Schmidt, the only Dwarf to skill up so far got viciously blocked and killed by the Warpfire. Subsequently, the red mist came over Bardrek's eyes when he saw a Skaven player prone on the turf along with a chance for revenge in turn 4! He fired up the Deathroller and cackled with glee yet not only did he fail to hurt the rat, he got himself sent off too!
Still, revenge was on the menu for the Social Club and we kept searching for payback. Sadly, the cheque had bounced and in turn 5 Gegrak Blackaxe saw himself joining Bardrek in the stands. Not to be outdone, Bazvar Baradil attempted a foul with 3 of his mates to finally rid the world of the Skaven menace only for the eagle-eyed ref to send him off as well in turn 8!!
In the second half, not a huge amount happened. The Warhammerers Social Club kept trying to down the Skaven and kept failing to break their armour. Stern words will be spoken with our sports science department as obviously the "supplements" we are taking are not having the desired effect.
While all this was going on, the Skaven managed to score again and put the game beyond us! That being said, 60k winnings were used to bring in Dornier's talented young brother Heinkel Schmidt who we hope can do better than the big man! Perhaps Block to be taken first? Nah, 'tis not the Warhammerer's way!
MATCH COUNT
TDs - 0
CAS For - 0
Notable Injuries - 1 (Dead - Dornier Schmidt)
Sent Off - 3
Stay tuned as we hope to bring you a match from the Juniors squad very soon!
May your powder stay dry and your trapdoors always open! |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Jan 06, 2014 - 04:10 |
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MATCH INFORMATION
Warhammerers Juniors 0-2 killing you softly!!
Wow! The first time out for the youth squad and it was a massacre! An errant bomb thrown on turn 1 was a taste of what was to come and by turn 3 we were down to 4 players. A death in turn 3 was saved by our Apothecary but we had another 2 Gnomes bite the dust including one of our (very expensive) squig slayers! a disaster! Still 0-0 at the half.
The second half was much of the same as there isn't much you can do when you only have 4 guys (including two cannons) left on the pitch. killing you softly!! tried scoring quickly to get some of our KO'd Gnomes back on the pitch but some just couldn't be awakened. More injuries in the second half meant that the Warhammerers Juniors need some real patching up before their next game! Final score? 2-0 to those crazed Chaos Halflings along with a battery of bruised and sorry players. Those that left the game in one piece have informed this reporter that the worm will turn and they are out for blood.
Who will face the Juniors' wrath? Stay tuned! |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Jan 08, 2014 - 03:51 |
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Well, Heinkel Schmidt, the replacement for the dearly departed Dornier Schmidt has just been killed on debut for the Warhammerers Social Club! Two dead Runners in two games. Ouch!
Match report to come. |
_________________
"Gallifrey falls no more"
Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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PandaPower
Joined: Aug 17, 2005
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| Posted:
Jan 21, 2014 - 18:36 |
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Fun fluff - I especially like the rule book lawyer bit  |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Jan 21, 2014 - 23:10 |
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Cheers mate! You have to give credit to Harvestmouse for that lawyer fluff. He did a fantastic job! On the logos too. |
_________________
"Gallifrey falls no more"
Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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