Mully
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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 Posted:
Jan 05, 2004 - 18:32 |
 
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Our long-time reigning FUMBBL coach king has seen his #1 spot in the polls fall to a mere 2.04 points so it is quite undertandable that the pressure must be getting to him.
What I find so incredible is that he has been able to hold this title while getting NO luck from Nuffle and the dice. Here are some game excerpts ;
1/5/04
"An utter rape job. I trailed by 29% luck for most of the game, only some garbage time one dice pows near the end brought me up from 41%."
1/5/04
"Stupid dice rolls cost me the draw, and me not stalling in the first half cost me the game."
1/1/04
"Well it really was a rape job in the first half. I started with the ball, and survived the fireball, but not the 5 failed attempts to pick up the ball. Instead of being 1-0 up at the half (hopefully) it was 0-1 down."
12/30/03
"A total rape job. Nothing the Boyz did worked today, tripping over their own feet (snake-eyes about 4 times) and dropping easy catches."
12/19/03
"Was a BS game with the luck pretty much going all my opponent's way all game apart from some two critical turns where I managed to pull off passes to Bull Centaurs to score."
12/13/03
"Total rape job. The dice were rigged pretty much the whole game. Don't be deceived by the 100 Str. I had some Sprints and Sure Feets, and my opponent had Diving Tackle all over the place. In Stunty Diving Tackle kills."
12/12/03
"A total rape job I am afraid. Whilst my opponent played very well, the game was pretty much given to him by the dice rolls. First half I started with the ball and has 37% luck for the half compared to his 76%. I rolled pushes or skull/pows all day, he got 1 dice pows that caused KOs on my 9 AV. He also fouled one of my best players and the apoth failed of course."
12/11/03
"A total rape job early with my Gutter Runner dodging to score rolling snake-eyes and killing himself. Then I continued to get players KOd in the first half and fail GFIs whilst my opponent pretty much made every roll he needed."
12/03/03
"A total rape job. The luck was even worse than what is showing above as it was 38% to 69% before a turn 6 first half disconnect by my opponent."
Mr Malthor, I think I speak for all of FUMBBL with a request for an article in the next GLN entitled "How to Win When You're Getting Raped". Your ability to remain atop the FUMBBL standings when it is obvious the dice are against you is absolutely astounding.
Heck I need +60% luck just to get a tie let alone win +80% of my matches. Unfortunately, time zones prevent me from ever having the opportunity to witness this greatness in person. But if I ever make a trip to Australia I'd like to come visit and possibly have you autograph my mouse.
Mully (only 50 spots away from greatness)
Disclosure : the above commentary was made in jest. Unfortunately, disclosing that it was made in jest takes a bit of the edge off the humor. |
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Mezir
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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| Posted:
Jan 05, 2004 - 18:38 |
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I like to think my whining is more colourful, and contains better metaphors. :p |
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Chappy
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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Jan 06, 2004 - 02:01 |
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He should play with Zons more often. At least then he'll procreate a whole new batch of crappy players.  |
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Zy-Nox
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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Jan 06, 2004 - 02:06 |
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He gets rapded a lot eh eh  |
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Thadrin
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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| Posted:
Jan 08, 2004 - 12:30 |
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Am I alone in finding that phrase somewhat tasteless? |
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origami
Joined: Oct 14, 2003
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| Posted:
Jan 08, 2004 - 23:01 |
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BadMrMojo
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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| Posted:
Jan 12, 2004 - 20:19 |
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MixX
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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Jan 12, 2004 - 20:27 |
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| Thadrin wrote: | | Am I alone in finding that phrase somewhat tasteless? |
nope |
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Mully
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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Jan 12, 2004 - 20:55 |
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Alert Alert !!! Celyn has now replaced Malthor as the #1 FUMBBL coach. Therefore, Malthor's GLN article is no longer requested.
And I played Celyn this weekend so I know first hand how he wins. If he is losing a game he inserts a virus into the game which makes players or the ball disapear from the field of play, thus making it impossible to finish play.
Experts are investigating!! |
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EvolveToAnarchism
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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| Posted:
Feb 13, 2004 - 16:44 |
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| Thadrin wrote: | | Am I alone in finding that phrase somewhat tasteless? |
Nope, I also find it incredibly tasteless.
To compare a blood bowl loss to the trauma that someone experiences whe one is raped is either incredibly insensitive or demonstrates that one has invested too much into winning.
I find it doubly worrying as Malthor is also an approval monkey. Part of his responsibilities is to keep the site "family friendly". I find it hard to believe that the fumbbl community would consider the constant references to rape as family friendly.
It makes me wonder what reasons he could give for rejecting the following team:
Team Name: Why Malthor Loses
Players:
1) "An utter rape job."
2) "Well it really was a rape job in the first half"
3) "A total rape job."
4) "Total rape job. The dice were rigged pretty much the whole game."
5) "A total rape job I am afraid."
6) "A total rape job early with my Gutter Runner dodging to score rolling snake-eyes and killing himself."
7) "A total rape job. The luck was even worse than what is showing above as it was 38% to 69% before a turn 6 first half disconnect by my opponent." "
 "Got raped repeatedly in the first half with him blitzing me and me rolling a stack of ones."
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.
.
If the above are deemed fit for Malthor to post in his match reports, how could he justify turning down the above team?
As Always,
Evolve To Anarchism
Link |
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Ignorance is Strength quis custodiet ipsos custodes As Always, Evolve To Anarchism |
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AlcingRagaholic
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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Feb 13, 2004 - 16:50 |
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Well, there should be some restraint on the part of everyone when it comes to language, not just team names. If Malthor claims to be raped as often as he is, he would have quit playing a long time ago... I mean, when the chips are down THAT much, you take your money and leave.
Z |
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Chickenbrain
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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Feb 13, 2004 - 16:59 |
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No. You keep on playing. Or trick some other dumbs in losing against you... *grin* Especially elves... |
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