JackassRampant
Joined: Feb 26, 2011
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 Posted:
Sep 19, 2015 - 02:38 |
 
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Welcome to the JackassRampant NBFL Power Rankings! Every couple of weeks, I'll post new rankings. They are arbitrary to be sure, but the metrics I'm looking at are:
* What's your record?
* What's your division/playoff standing?
* Who have you played?
* How scary/nifty are you?
* Who are your rivals? |
_________________
Lude enixe, obliviscatur timor.
Last edited by JackassRampant on %b %19, %2017 - %18:%Mar; edited 19 times in total |
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JackassRampant
Joined: Feb 26, 2011
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| Posted:
Sep 19, 2015 - 02:39 |
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Jackass Rampant's NBFL Power Rankings
Week 1-2
The NBFL season XV cross-conference tournament is on, and 1.5 weeks in, we have absolutely no sense of the pecking order. That means it's time for the Jackass Rampant Power Rankings! With that in mind, here are our meaningless Week 1.5 JRPRs.
1 Cincinatti Bludgeoners (Nurgle, AFCN, 1-0-0). A narrow win vs Chicago isn't convincing, but coach Sutherlands and the Superbowl champs are on a 7-game win streak (10 games unbeaten).
2 Green Ball Attackers (Slann, NFCN, 1-0-0). Charles Woodson is expected to miss a match. Green Ball is not expected to miss a beat. These guys will be contenders so long as they're coached by Happygrue.
3 New York Giant Leeches (Vampire, NFCE, 1-1-0). The NFC champions are ranked #3 and not #2 because of an unexpected tie vs. Weaklington. The_Provocateur is one of the world's top coaches.
4 New Angryland Bulltrots (Chaos Dwarf, AFCE, 2-0-0). New Angryland has been on a tear after pulling one off on Miami and then mauling Dallas. Coach Licker must be tired of the basement.
5 Tennesse Titanz (Orc, AFCS, 1-0-0). These guys are terrors every season, and they've gotten better every year under Arktoris. They're healthy, too. And hefty at 2.72 million gold.
6 Atlatl 'n' Falchions (Lizardman, NFCS, 1-0-0). A win over Indy is always a good thing. Indy's tough. Trey Lew's will be missing at Tennesse, that's not so good. Coach RyanFitz is a big boy, he'll adapt.
7 Indianapolis Crypts (Undead, AFCS, 1-0-1). This team is brutal. They're ancient. They're deadly. Coach MrNomad should be proud of what he's made. They lost to Atlatl, but that stuff happens. They also beat Carolina, who are much better than the lowly standing I give them.
8 Seattle Weed Gawks (High Elf, NFCW, 1-1-0). After beating Arizona and tying In-Sane Louie, they face Keggie City next. This could help them get off to a solid start and fly high for awhile. Coach Stimme has developed a nice tight 13-man squad that's TV-efficient but not cheap.
9 In-Sane Louie Goats (Chaos, NFCW, 1-1-0). Coach Garnak is on a roll, beating San Fran and tying Seattle. The team will be missing its star safety, second-year Beastman Xipe-Totec of SDSU, going up against the San Dogo Chompers. Uh-oh.
10 Oakland Elf Raiders (Dark Elf, AFCW, 1-0-0). Losing Kendricks right before playing Femver could be painful, as could the Raiders' decision to hire some very raw UDFAs. Still, plus coaching from ex-convict and a commitment to excellence have made a good team. One win vs Keggie City means very little, however.
11 Gnawleans Stank (Nurgle, NFCS, 1-0-0). The NFC South is a tough division, and these guys are a big part of the reason why. After handling the Hearthstone Hexen, they get Tampa next, and then the schedule tightens up with Atlatl, Indy, and Carolina.
12 Miami Krakens (Chaos Pact, AFCE, 1-0-1). Sure, Erric Rhett is missing against Weaklington, but I think the Krakens will have the upper hand in the coming match. A loss against New Angryland is troubling, but it's hard to look past coach Bullroarer4's 12-0-2 record last season.
13 Weaklington Frailskins (Elf, NFCE, 1-1-0). A forfeit win to the Jehtz and a tie against the conference champions isn't a bad way to start the season. Still, tough challenges lay ahead for coach Garcangel.
14 Dallas Dendrophiliacs (Wood Elf, NFCE, 1-0-1). Dallas beat Buffalo and lost to New Angryland. That's what teams ranked in the middle do. OTS is a solid coach and the Dendros are a good team, but they need to rack up the cross-divisional wins, playing with Relezite and The_Provocateur.
15 San Dogo Chompers (Human, AFCW 0-1-0). A hard-hitting team that can score in one turn is always dangerous. Coach Kryten's squad was mauled last year, but the newcomers are promising. A tie against Femver isn't a bad start.
16 Femver Blonde Co (Amazon, AFCW, 0-1-0). This is my team. We could have beaten San Dogo with a better one-turn defense, and we like to think that we bring a very aggressive control game that our rivals will learn to hate.
17 San Fran Black Plague (Skaven, NFCW, 1-0-1). A loss to In-Sane Louie isn't a good thing, but BillBrasky's rats kind of made up for it by beating Arizona. They have everything you look for in a quality Skaven side.
18 Philhala Arni (Norse, NFCE, 0-0-1) Yeah, they dropped their first match, but it's the Giant Leeches, and sometimes that'll happen. The Arni are a nasty, bruising squad and Relezite is one of the world's better coaches. They'll be fine.
19 Detroilet Sewer Lions (Nurgle, NFCN, 0-0-1). This team scares me. They keep me up at night. Nurgle in general are fantastic in this format. The Sewer Lions lost to Green Ball, which isn't good for their playoff chances, but isn't a particularly bad omen. Coach Lorebass will recover.
20 Pittsburgh Pirates (Chaos Dwarf, AFCN, 1-0-0). Pittsburgh brings it every time. This time, they brought it to a forfeit win over Minnesota, which could have been a lucky break for coach Nicodemus1. They have a lot of competition in their effort to take down the champions, but they're a danger every time they take the pitch.
21 Tampa Bay Charging Corsairs (Amazon, NFCS, 0-1-0). I know first-hand how rough Amazons sometimes have it in a high-TV league. But so far so good, Tampa is in okay shape given that, like Oakland and Cleave'n, coach Miyuso put in a very cursory offseason. I don't get it that coaches do that: training camp is where you build your identity.
22 Jacksonville Pactuars (Chaos Pact, AFCS, 0-2-0). Coach Apojar is very self-effacing when he does the draft grades, but don't be fooled: he's solid. Ties against Tampa and Hearthstone are bad news, and the Pactuars are still building, but this squad will be dangerous by next season at the latest.
23 Cleave'n Dog Pound (Necromantic, AFCN, 0-1-0). Coach huff is going to have to huff and puff to blow down Cincy's house this year. He didn't build his squad to full strength in the offseason, but he's confident that he can manage it anyway. There's always next season....
24 BeardyMoore Shavens (Dwarf, AFCN, 0-1-0). A tie against underprepared Cleave'n isn't a great sign, and BeardyMoore needs to show more if they're going to take on the Bludgeoners. Coach WingedHuman's squad got mauled last year, but maybe this year will be different.
25 Hearthstone Hexen (Dwarf, AFCS, 0-1-1). A loss to Gnawleans and a tie against Jacksonville have the Hexen starting out in something of a hole in a tough division with Indy and Houston. Coach Pentalarc will get a big test against the Crypts in Week 3.
26 Minnesota Wolfkings (Necromantic, NFCN, 0-0-1). A forfeit loss to Pittsburgh is a bad way to start the season, but coach ritzi can make up for it. He has a strong squad. I'm still dropping him in the Power Rankings because he forfeited Week 1. That's an offense against Nuffle.
27 Chicago Bear-ds (Dwarf, NFCN, 0-0-1). Dropping one cross-conference game to the champs means little. But the Bear-ds took mad damage in the process, and that means a lot. Coach Aenir has more bash on his schedule with Pittsburgh and BeardyMoore coming up.
28 Carolina Black Panther Party (Elf, NFCS, 0-0-2). If it's any consolation, head coach and league commissioner Jeffro has faced some tough opposition in Ten and Indy. I expect them to climb out of the cellar.
29 Arizona Sinners (Skaven, NFCW, 0-0-2). After losses to Seattle and San Fran, I have faith that coach FRSHMN can dig his way out of a 0-0-2 hole. But for now, they are where they are and it is what it is.
30 Keggie City Chimpanziefs (Simyin, AFCW 0-0-1). Simyins are a challenge to play well, and coach keggiemckill brings an expansion squad to a highly stacked division. This will be a developing year.
31 Buffalo Billy Goat Gruffs (Chaos, AFCE, 0-0-2). Coach Burgun824 will win (or at least tie) a few games, but this season is mostly about building into a long-term threat.
32 NYJ (???, AFCE, 0-0-1). Watch this space. It will soon be filled by the mighty icesmooth and his record of 571-178-209 (69%). |
_________________
Lude enixe, obliviscatur timor.
Last edited by JackassRampant on %b %21, %2015 - %02:%Sep; edited 1 time in total |
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Arktoris
Joined: Feb 16, 2004
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| Posted:
Sep 19, 2015 - 02:45 |
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Tennesse Tuxedo (Head Coach of the Titanz) "We're sort of healthy. Quite a few cracks in the concrete now. Good news is we can lose a few good men and still have a nice 1st string showing." |
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Hail to Manowar! The latest charioteer to DIE for bloodbowl! - Slain, by Ghor Oggaz |
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Jeffro
Joined: Jan 22, 2009
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Sep 19, 2015 - 04:07 |
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My goal is to have my Power Ranking match my draft pick...
Nice stuff, JR. Love it  |
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licker
Joined: Jul 10, 2009
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Sep 19, 2015 - 04:42 |
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I am tired of the basement, but remind me, why am I tired of the basement? |
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FRSHMN
Joined: Feb 25, 2013
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Sep 19, 2015 - 12:58 |
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Yeah, we're in the Top30 \o/ |
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JackassRampant
Joined: Feb 26, 2011
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| Posted:
Sep 19, 2015 - 17:26 |
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| licker wrote: | | I am tired of the basement, but remind me, why am I tired of the basement? |
K, "basement" is a strong word. Looking back over your history you've only turned in one stinker year over the last five. Still, it's nice to beat Miami, no? |
_________________
Lude enixe, obliviscatur timor. |
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keggiemckill
Joined: Oct 07, 2004
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Sep 28, 2015 - 08:47 |
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Not to be a pest here, but if you don't put in your power rankings, I can't do my Weekly Shoot talking. |
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The Drunker I get, the more I spill
"Keggie is the guy with the bleach blond hair that gives answers nobody else would think of."
Jeffro |
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Arktoris
Joined: Feb 16, 2004
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Oct 06, 2015 - 03:47 |
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you mean this gets done every week?
cool |
_________________
Hail to Manowar! The latest charioteer to DIE for bloodbowl! - Slain, by Ghor Oggaz |
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keggiemckill
Joined: Oct 07, 2004
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Oct 06, 2015 - 03:51 |
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I thought they would be. |
_________________
The Drunker I get, the more I spill
"Keggie is the guy with the bleach blond hair that gives answers nobody else would think of."
Jeffro |
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MrNomad
Joined: Mar 24, 2007
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Oct 06, 2015 - 06:40 |
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We want more power rankings!!!  |
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JackassRampant
Joined: Feb 26, 2011
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Oct 06, 2015 - 07:21 |
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Gonna let Week 4 finish up, you'll have 'em soon. |
_________________
Lude enixe, obliviscatur timor. |
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JackassRampant
Joined: Feb 26, 2011
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Oct 06, 2015 - 07:22 |
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| keggiemckill wrote: | | Not to be a pest here, but if you don't put in your power rankings, I can't do my Weekly Shoot talking. |
I'll do my JRPRs every 2 weeks. |
_________________
Lude enixe, obliviscatur timor. |
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licker
Joined: Jul 10, 2009
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Oct 06, 2015 - 07:33 |
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Nice.
Be sure to mention all the massive teams dealing zillions of CAS thus far. I'll toot my horn, NA has done 20 CAS through 3 games (4th game was a forfeit), though there are 3 other teams all having done 18, so lots of carnage this season.
Poor Bill and OTS have each taken 23 though!
Impressive guys
NA still has vamps and norse to cut down, that's a lot of AV7! |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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Oct 06, 2015 - 07:53 |
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Since New Tomb left there has been far more turnover than one would expect. What gives in the Meadowlands?? |
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