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The_Great_Gobbo
Last seen 16 weeks ago
Goblin
Experienced
Goblin
Record
41/39/645
Win Percentage
8%
Orc
Emerging Star
Orc
Record
13/3/17
Win Percentage
44%
Overall
[R]
Veteran
Overall
Record
54/42/661
Win Percentage
10%
Archive

2018

2018-01-05 12:15:30
rating 5.4

2017

2017-12-27 16:43:51
rating 5.5
2017-03-01 21:20:56
rating 6

2016

2016-12-12 17:33:50
rating 5.9
2016-12-08 21:04:33
rating 6
2016-12-07 21:09:17
rating 6
2016-12-06 17:59:32
rating 6
2016-10-06 08:51:41
rating 5.7
2016-04-20 19:06:50
rating 5.8
2016-01-18 08:46:18
rating 5.8

2015

2015-12-24 12:58:46
rating 5.4
2015-10-12 15:43:14
rating 6
2015-10-05 15:10:52
rating 6
2015-10-01 14:42:06
rating 6
2015-08-06 15:36:54
rating 5.7
2015-07-17 00:28:10
rating 5.8
2015-07-15 15:22:22
rating 6
2015-06-30 11:54:03
rating 5.9
2015-04-22 14:17:08
rating 5.6
2015-04-20 12:52:18
rating 5.6
2015-04-10 01:05:15
rating 5.5
2015-03-17 00:43:05
rating 5.7
2015-03-12 14:31:14
rating 6
2015-03-11 00:24:39
rating 5.8
2015-03-04 13:54:35
rating 6
2015-03-02 15:21:24
rating 5.3
2015-02-23 15:46:24
rating 6
2015-02-19 12:56:45
rating 6
2015-01-22 12:58:39
rating 5.6
2015-01-20 18:36:18
rating 6
2015-01-20 13:55:35
rating 5.7
2015-01-13 17:42:41
rating 6
2015-01-12 14:19:44
rating 5.6
2015-01-01 18:21:17
rating 6

2014

2014-12-31 10:04:22
rating 5.7
2014-12-30 10:59:38
rating 6
2014-12-23 09:56:24
rating 6
2014-12-10 14:26:16
rating 5.9
2014-12-09 19:10:26
rating 6
2014-12-01 09:22:30
rating 6
2014-11-29 11:30:56
rating 5.9
2014-11-26 18:07:55
rating 6
2014-11-09 22:35:16
rating 6
2014-11-07 12:26:08
rating 6
2014-11-06 11:55:47
rating 6
2014-11-03 13:49:56
rating 6
2014-10-28 21:49:57
rating 6
2014-10-28 19:50:01
rating 6
2014-10-24 11:36:26
rating 5.9
2014-10-23 11:43:20
rating 6
2014-10-21 01:42:26
rating 5.9
2014-10-19 22:19:28
rating 6
2014-10-17 23:39:15
rating 6
2014-10-13 23:48:20
rating 6
2014-10-01 15:24:43
rating 5.9
2014-09-26 17:01:02
rating 5.9
2014-09-25 20:40:17
rating 6
2014-09-23 14:10:11
rating 6
2014-09-16 15:35:31
rating 6
2014-09-16 00:15:22
rating 6
2014-09-11 16:16:54
rating 5.8
2015-03-12 14:31:14
6 votes, rating 6
A Nawty-kul Tail Part 2
Deff Frum Abuvv are lined up on the docks an open suitcase in front of each of them. Stalking along the line is Frugglrikk Forest, inspecting each suitcase personally. Satisfied he turns to Honest John who is standing next to a small wooden crate.

Frugglrikk Forest: "Rite den John, it looks like we iz reddy ter go, ware arr der supplies an der bowt?"
Honest John: "In here mate, everything the Great Gobbo ordered for you before he left."
FF: "An der bowt?"
HJ: "It's in there as well"
FF: "In der? We woant fit in a bowt dat small!"
HJ: "No you idiot it is an inflatable dinghy, you take it out and fill it with air and it gets much bigger. Right i'm off I have stuff to do. Take care."

Honest John sidles off.

FF: "Oi Grog, open dis krate."

Legendary troll Grog Fizznekka wanders over, looks at the crate and then smashes it with one massive blow from his mighty arm.

FF: "Err, grate. Cheers Grog. Now letz av a butchers at wot we az ere."

Frugglrikk Forest pulls a scrunched up rubber thing out of the debris along with a plastic eyepatch on a piece of elastic and a signed note. There is nothing else.

FF: "Wot der bluddy ell? Ere get started on blowin dat dingy up whilst I reed dis"

The note reads:

Deer Deff Frum Abuvv,

included in dis box iz everyfin yew need ter get ter der game. Box shud av:

1x Offishul pirat eye patch
1x Offishul pirat bowt.

Yew will av ter nikk anyfin else yew need az yew iz now piratz an I ent payin fer anyfin else. Doant kum bak if yew doant win.

Luv GG x

A large explosion rocks the docks and then it starts to rain. But rain is wet and this stuff is rubbery and....Frugglrikk turns round to see a very pleased Dyno Mite grinning at him.

Dyno Mite: "Finished blowin up der bowt boss, wotz next?"
FF: "Yew moron, ow we gunna get ter der game now?"
DM: "Yew tole me ter blow it up"
FF: "Jus shurrup wile I fink."

Frugglrikk surveyed the docks and his small red eyes settled on a wooden galleon that was being loaded at the next pier.

FF: "Be a pirat ee sed", as he picked up the eyepatch and put it on. "So letz be pirats, GRAB YER KIT WE IZ NIKKIN DAT BOWT!"

Soon the galleon is underway and leaving the docks and quite a few dockworkers who seem to cursing loudly and nursing injuries to their genitals.

FF: "Mr Kleen III ard a port if yew please"
MrK3: "Aye aye capin, ow bowt sum brandy az well?"
FF: "Gud ideer. Stroke o luk findin all dis booze on bord."
MrK3: "Wich way do I sail?"
FF: "Gork n Mork will tek kare o dat fer us, ULLYFAN ERE WE KUM!"
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Comments
Posted by eldritchfox on 2015-03-12 14:46:02
"Never get out of the boat." Absolutely goddamn right! Unless you were goin' all the way... Frugglrikk got off the boat. He split from the whole f***in' program.