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Throweck
Online
Underworld Denizens
Legend
Underworld Denizens
Record
62/21/55
Win Percentage
53%
Ogre
Emerging Star
Ogre
Record
4/2/10
Win Percentage
31%
Overall
Super Star
Overall
Record
788/308/805
Win Percentage
50%
Archive

2018

2018-09-25 10:19:35
rating 6
2018-09-25 00:12:53
rating 6
2018-09-21 19:20:02
rating 5.5
2018-09-18 00:47:12
rating 5.5
2018-09-15 12:42:14
rating 5.6
2018-09-14 20:22:05
rating 4
2018-09-12 18:59:51
rating 5.6
2018-09-11 10:23:25
rating 5.5
2018-09-11 00:22:53
rating 5.4
2018-09-08 22:31:46
rating 5.5
2018-09-03 23:17:34
rating 5.9
2018-08-28 01:09:35
rating 5.5
2018-08-24 19:32:30
rating 5.5
2018-08-17 13:30:10
rating 5.6
2018-07-15 11:38:56
rating 5.5
2018-07-10 23:06:04
rating 4.8
2018-07-10 19:39:53
rating 5
2018-07-07 10:21:29
rating 5.5
2018-07-05 20:21:57
rating 6
2018-06-27 21:13:20
rating 5.2
2018-06-22 21:07:28
rating 4.8
2018-06-21 21:07:18
rating 5.7
2018-05-24 21:41:49
rating 5.6
2018-05-22 18:34:19
rating 5.6
2018-05-13 20:11:54
rating 5.3
2018-05-01 22:03:52
rating 5.2
2018-04-25 22:39:20
rating 5.7
2018-02-27 21:59:42
rating 5.4

2017

2017-12-16 10:07:23
rating 6
2017-10-30 19:25:22
rating 6
2017-10-26 17:55:55
rating 6
2017-10-03 16:17:34
rating 6
2017-09-24 09:09:14
rating 6
2017-09-13 20:37:48
rating 6
2017-09-12 12:47:05
rating 6
2017-08-30 21:09:59
rating 6
2017-08-02 11:20:50
rating 0
2017-07-30 19:57:08
rating 5.9
2017-07-11 20:55:47
rating 6
2017-06-21 20:34:06
rating 6
2017-06-07 13:55:36
rating 6
2017-05-24 09:12:54
rating 4.3
2017-05-20 16:10:01
rating 6
2017-05-17 11:22:46
rating 6
2017-05-15 09:55:20
rating 6
2017-05-07 22:13:41
rating 6
2017-05-02 14:15:24
rating 6
2017-04-18 19:16:14
rating 6
2017-04-16 14:56:10
rating 6
2017-03-31 20:42:43
rating 6
2017-03-19 22:04:47
rating 6
2017-03-17 13:14:37
rating 6
2017-02-18 08:34:02
rating 6
2017-02-09 09:10:27
rating 6
2017-01-24 09:51:11
rating 5

2016

2016-12-31 21:48:39
rating 5.3
2016-12-18 09:11:02
rating 5.9
2016-11-21 23:02:57
rating 5.8
2016-11-20 21:27:49
rating 5
2016-11-07 10:58:00
rating 5.3
2016-11-04 21:50:11
rating 4.6
2016-11-02 10:11:05
rating 6
2016-10-13 12:17:46
rating 6
2016-10-03 21:30:31
rating 6
2016-09-11 16:47:36
rating 5.2
2016-09-07 12:57:32
rating 6
2016-09-06 15:51:40
rating 6
2016-08-31 19:35:39
rating 6
2016-08-24 21:56:03
rating 5.1
2016-08-15 19:04:47
rating 6
2016-08-10 00:16:25
rating 6
2016-07-20 21:19:23
rating 5.3
2016-06-23 14:24:41
rating 6
2016-05-15 23:18:57
rating 5
2016-04-20 10:08:14
rating 6
2016-04-16 22:43:04
rating 5.1
2016-04-07 13:21:00
rating 4.5
2016-03-29 10:44:26
rating 5.5
2016-02-25 21:14:37
rating 5.8

2015

2015-11-17 13:31:39
rating 5.8
2015-10-14 19:26:39
rating 5.3
2015-10-09 15:27:19
rating 4.3
2015-10-02 22:09:57
rating 5
2015-08-02 15:39:12
rating 4
2015-06-29 20:27:52
rating 6
2015-06-27 00:18:47
rating 5.6
2015-02-22 20:57:11
rating 5.7

2014

2014-12-16 12:53:07
rating 5.9
2014-12-12 14:47:13
rating 5.3
2014-09-27 23:17:03
rating 6
2014-05-17 14:40:18
rating 5
2014-04-22 15:47:17
rating 5.5
2014-04-17 22:31:53
rating 5.4
2014-03-29 08:33:54
rating 5.7
2014-02-05 12:05:30
rating 5.9

2013

2013-12-20 09:49:46
rating 5.3
2013-11-21 22:53:23
rating 5.1
2013-11-08 13:20:47
rating 5
2013-10-07 11:05:40
rating 5.4
2013-09-15 12:34:52
rating 4.2
2013-06-26 09:09:35
rating 5.5
2013-06-24 12:38:10
rating 5.5
2013-05-24 15:51:35
rating 5.1
2013-05-10 14:13:23
rating 4
2013-04-29 20:30:00
rating 5.7
2018-09-25 10:19:35
24 votes, rating 6
Serious Blog - Not sure what to call it!
First of all, thank you for reading this blog until the end!

Most of you will know me, or played me at some point. I've been around for a while now!

Recently, my life changed. I had a mental breakdown in October, and then another in February due to the pressure of my job. I have been diagnosed with depression and general anxiety disorder. This is something that has taken me some time to accept and looking back, I've had these conditions for years but managed to mask them to others, including my family. In October, I popped. Took myself off to the hospital and started to get help. In February we had an unsuccessful inspection and I deteriated once again. I am currently off work due to the level of anxiety I have just reading an email from work!

Why am I telling you this? First of all, I believe mental health should be a thing we talk about. If we did, I could have had help sooner and recognised my conditions. I am now in a place where day to day life is managable and doing the podcasts over the last 6 weeks has really helped!

Secondly, I have had time to think about a change in career. I can't continue in the role I am in. It would kill me.

I have decided to become a driving instructor as I can then carve my work around my children and go back to being a good dad and husband also. However, the fees are pretty high and I need to get this sorted sooner rather than later as I have depepndents and I can't be off sick forever! Being off sick is somehting I have never done and it feels strange. Doctor's orders! From this it was suggested by a friend that I try a 'GoFundMe' campaign. So I have...

GoFundMe

If you could support my adventure I would be truly thankful. If not financially, please share the link. If not at all, at the very least I appreciate you taking the time to read this blog.

I understand that I am discussing some personal mental things here but these kind of discussions need to happen. A member of your family could also be suffereing unnoticed.

I am happy to answer any questions through pm if you wish and I'd like to thank Christer for allowing me to post this here.

Throweck
Rate this entry
Comments
Posted by flashman1234 on 2018-09-25 11:42:41
Stop reading emails

Good luck fella.
Posted by Calthor on 2018-09-25 12:00:30
Self-care is important, yes.
Posted by Loew on 2018-09-25 12:09:51
this may be the first time I've seen someone reference to driving instructor as a less stressfull job! But good luck with your plans.

and yes, we (tm) should talk more about mental health
Posted by Nightbird on 2018-09-25 14:11:34
The first step is self-awareness. I applaud you for your open honesty & efforts in mental health awareness. As well for your bravery to recognize & implement a plan that will help you reach a better place inlife for yourself & your family. Good luck w/ your new direction in life sir.

~NB
Posted by Meanandugl on 2018-09-25 15:10:27
Another one with depression ...
Two colleagues, one of my sisters, a good friend, and another FUMBBLer (don't want to disclose the name), all suffering from depression. And that's only the list of known cases more or less close to me, might be I know several others who have not disclosed it, maybe not even to themselves.

And now you, Throweck. Really sorry about it. From what I learned and experienced with relatives and friends depression doesn't go away quickly and is difficult to overcome, this will be a long fight. I hope you'll succeed.

All the best Sir! (will contribute a bit, hope it's going to help).
Posted by PeteW on 2018-09-25 16:47:49
Completely understand where you are coming from, as having the same job as you, and in similar circumstances I made a life switch two years ago. Definitely get out!

Happy to have a chat professionally if that would help - you can find me online!
Posted by luxyluxo on 2018-09-25 19:14:01
It takes a lot of guts and bravery to share this with the Fumbbl community and I think it will definitely help in the long term recovery.

The Podcasts are AWESOME you would never know you suffered from depression or anxiety. You definitely are an intelligent, bright guy with a lot of charisma, once you have recovered the world is your oyster job wise. Definitely quit that old job, stop looking at those e-mails, keep producing awesome podcasts and come back stronger than before .

Posted by Throweck on 2018-09-25 19:35:36
Thank you. When I do the podcasts, it is very much like I am me for a little while. If that makes any sense!