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Past Players of Philosophical Phootball
| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 8 | Aristippus | Beastman Runner | 1 | 0 | Horns | d |
| 6 | Echecrates | Beastman Runner | 3 | 0 | Horns | d |
| 2 | Apollodorus | Chosen Blocker | 2 | 0 | ||
| 6 | Melissus | Beastman Runner | 2 | 0 | Horns | -ag |
| 8 | Democritus | Beastman Runner | 3 | 0 | Horns | -st |
| 6 | Socrates | Beastman Runner | 7 | 13 | Horns, Block | m, d |
| 12 | Hippias | Beastman Runner | 18 | 54 | Horns, Block, Mighty Blow, Claw, Tentacles | |
| 11 | Protagoras | Beastman Runner | 7 | 6 | Horns, +MA | d |
| 10 | Empedocles | Beastman Runner | 17 | 15 | Horns, Block | m, d |
| 9 | Zeno | Beastman Runner | 16 | 21 | Horns, Block, Mighty Blow | m, m, m, -av |
| 8 | Anaxagoras | Beastman Runner | 10 | 15 | Horns, Block | -av, m |
| 7 | Parmenides | Beastman Runner | 22 | 51 | Horns, Block, Mighty Blow, Claw, Piling On | m |
| 6 | Heraclitus | Beastman Runner | 6 | 11 | Horns, Block | d |
| 5 | Xenophanes | Beastman Runner | 17 | 10 | Horns, Block | d |
| 3 | Anaximenes | Chosen Blocker | 6 | 2 | d | |
| 2 | Anaximander | Chosen Blocker | 19 | 16 | Block, Mighty Blow | n |