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Tech Noir Assassinators
P [S] Nurglings

The Tech Noir Assassinators (T.N.A) have evolved over the years from two separate defense factions in the land of Siliconia. The first, and original, security force was the Autochthon Security Sect (A.S.S) which was comprised of men and women devoted to Siliconia, to protect the land from the wrongdoings of the Love Guns, an organized clan with dreams of controlling the land. A separate group, which used slighly more "interesting" techniques was the Treason, Insurgency and Terrorism Squad (T.I.T.S). The T.I.T.S operated in covert missions to thwart any attempt by the Guns to get on top of the government of Siliconia.

The two groups mainly operated toward the same goal, but would not share any information with each other about operations, or agent locations. This caused great consternation among the agents, especially after a certain incident which resulted in the loss of a deep-cover agent. After years of operating in this manner, a new Agency was formed: the T.N.A. No longer were men allowed to participate in security. The women felt that males too often looked at the female agents as objects and wanted to make the women do their bidding whenever they had a whim. The ladies decided it best to fight crime on their own terms.

The T.N.A don't play nice, they dont play fair...they play dirty. This new breed of agents are some of the most hardcore the land has seen. They will stop at nothing to get what they want, use any means to get you to spill the goods and squirt out your secrets. Make no mistake, the T.N.A. always gets their man, they will blow you away, and they can't wait to get their hands on YOU.

<img src="https://dl-web.dropbox.com/get/Photos/Asassinators.jpg?w=a66540bb">

Blood Bowl has long been a favorite pasttime of both the T.I.T.S. and A.S.S. After several seasons of play, both agencies found that some of the more recognizable players were having trouble successfully completing their operations - they were no longer able to work undercover. The Siliconia Athletic Commission (S.A.C) decreed that both the T.I.T.S. and A.S.S. would continue to run Blood Bowl teams, but the players would be recruits signed up specifically to play ball, rather than stop world crime.

In 2087, with the passing of the Linking of Extreme Guardianships Statute (L.E.G.S.), T.I.T.S. and A.S.S. came together under one umbrella. Both security agencies laid-off the male agents (some supervisory positions were still occupied by males) and wrote a new doctrine for fighting crime. In addition, the two separate blood bowl teams merged into one, combining the best and brightest players from both former squads. Together, the team boasts a versatile, flexible offensive system designted to take advantage of what the defense gives - either going balls deep or smashing through the hole for a score. But the real jerker is the defense that will bend, bend, bend but never break. Owner Haywoode Jablowme recently stated, "In all my years of team management, I have never seen such a pair of beauties," referring to the main attractions of the team, Jenna Jameson and Nikki Tyler. "They have taken the best shots every opponent can give, and they keep coming back for more." Coach Phillip McKracken agrees. "This team is unbelieveable. I have never seen so many players spend so much time on their backsides, but when it comes to crunchtime, they end up on top. Fans, make sure you are holding on to something, because you are in for the ride of your life."

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New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
1
Jenna Jameson
Beast
4 5 1 9
Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Loner, Mighty Blow, Nurgle's Rot, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Tentacles
Block, Pro, Claw, Tackle, Multiple Block
   23 0 0 0 54 1 113/176 250k
(120+130)k
  
2
Nikki Tyler
Beast
4 6 1 9
Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Loner, Mighty Blow, Nurgle's Rot, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Tentacles
Frenzy, +ST, Multiple Block
   12 0 0 0 19 0 38/51 220k
(120+100)k
  
3
Asia Carrera
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Catch, Sure Feet
   21 0 5 0 1 2 27/31 80k
(40+40)k
  
4
Eva Angelina
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Catch, Sure Feet
   23 0 3 0 5 2 29/31 80k
(40+40)k
  
5
Kobe Tai
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
   3 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
6
Teri Weigel
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Diving Tackle, Side Step
   23 0 0 0 4 4 28/31 80k
(40+40)k
  
7
Janine Lindemulder
Nurgling
4 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Side Step
 -ma 16 0 0 0 3 0 6/16 60k
(40+20)k
  
8
Lanny Barby
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
   3 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
9
Jewel De Nyle
Nurgling
6 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
+MA, Sure Feet, Side Step
   23 1 7 0 2 1 31/51 110k
(40+70)k
  
10
Devon
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Sure Feet, Diving Tackle
   16 0 4 0 2 1 21/31 80k
(40+40)k
  
11
Jesse Jane
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Diving Tackle
 n 7 0 1 0 1 1 10/16 60k
(40+20)k
  
12
Chasey Lain
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Dirty Player
   16 0 1 0 3 1 14/16 70k
(40+30)k
  
13
Michelle Wild
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
Diving Tackle
   3 0 1 0 0 1 8/16 60k
(40+20)k
  
14
Anna Malle
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
 m 2 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 40k
(0)k
  
15
Briana Banks
Plaguebearer
5 2 2 8
Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Horns, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration
   1 0 0 0 0 1 5/6 90k
(90+0)k
  
16
Jill Kelly
Nurgling
5 2 2 7
Dodge, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Stunty
   7 0 0 0 1 0 2/6 40k
(40+0)k
  
15 players (+1 player missing next game)  
Coach: tzilacatzin Re-Rolls (140k): 5  
Race: Nurglings Fan Factor: 12  
Current Team Value: 1850k Assistant Coaches: 2  
Treasury: 90k Cheerleaders: 0  
Team Value: 1890k Apothecary: No  

Games Played:23 (11/6/6) |TD Diff:7 (31 - 24) |Cas Diff:36 (58/48/32 - 46/38/18)
Last Opponent: Hospital