| Poll |
| KPL |
| Oh, yeah, Iam in. |
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46% |
[ 70 ] |
| Iam outta here |
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17% |
[ 26 ] |
| PIE: is this a pointless poll or what? |
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36% |
[ 54 ] |
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| Total Votes : 150 |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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 Posted:
Apr 11, 2014 - 18:29 |
 
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KPL update
Settra cannot be denied and when he comes calling all bend the knee to his will.
DrPoods and MrOdd have taken the place of the fallen and take up the call from Settra and look for glory, fame and immortality in the lands of Khemri. |
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Comish of the:  |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 11, 2014 - 20:00 |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Apr 11, 2014 - 20:42 |
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Oh yeah! Charnel Valley FTW!!! |
_________________
"Gallifrey falls no more"
Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Apr 13, 2014 - 17:08 |
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The Charnel Valley Black Shields thoroughly enjoyed their introduction to the KPL. Sadly they bid farewell to Herihor the Blitz Ra who got charted and failed regen early in the second half of his debut.
Thought the lads played alright but the CAS were not flowing our way. Combined with a lackluster 4 ineffective fouls there is work to be done!
Charnel Valley Black Shields 0-1 Mahrak Rises |
_________________
"Gallifrey falls no more"
Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 17, 2014 - 14:29 |
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Forfeits came down in one match...we have 3 matches still outstanding for round 3. I have extended the deadline to Friday morning...get the matches played or the forfeit hammer of Settra comes down. |
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Comish of the: |
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Beerox
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
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| Posted:
Apr 23, 2014 - 07:10 |
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Coming soon to a theater near you:
7-0 Lybaras Servitors v 7-0 Quatar Heretics |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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| Posted:
Apr 23, 2014 - 08:40 |
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SPOOOOOOGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 23, 2014 - 16:04 |
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The servants are fleeing, the lords and ladies are ducking and running. Tomb King Settra is enraged. The foundations of the palace are trembling. Rah-Ma stands next to his lord like a statue in the middle of a storm. He winces as Settra picks up a love seat, a gift from the queen of Cathay, given to Settra over 2000 years ago, and heaves it against the far wall. It blows up and is reduced to kindling wood. A priceless treasure reduced to scrap wood.
"My king, destroying all the furniture will not abate your anger. Nor will killing any more KPL ushers, beer vendors or locker room attendants. I have to say all those souls were innocent and are blamless."
"Rah-ma was it not you who told me to stop killing all who I saw and turn my attention to inanimate objects to apease my anger? I have to say you are a very bad psychologist because the more chairs and furniture I destroy the more angry I BECOME!!!"
"I warned you my King that searching for coach Stanley by yourself would only anger you further. He has disappeared and will resurface in due time. You would be able to take out your anger then, not now."
Settra stops destroying the furniture and sits down in the last chair left in the room
"I do not understand Rah-Ma the NFC coaches. They are slackers and loafers. Some of them are rabble rousers and the other half it seem do not have any idea what a deadline is. In fact it seems that the coaches who have not missed a match up to this point are the North American coaches playing in the Europe conference.
Settra starts to fidget in his chair
The rage is growing again Rah-ma!"
"My king, we still have one day until the end of the deadline for round 4. Iam sure as with the last few weeks the NFC will get back in gear and all the matches will get played on the last day."
"I hope you are right Rah-ma."
Settra storms out of the room with 4 servants who were ease dropping on the converstaion run away in front of him in terror.
Rah-ma looks down at his letter from coach Frankenstein and stuffs it in his back pocket. Settra can hear this news at a later date.
***************************************
KPL Morning Update
NFC conference has drawn the ire of Settra.
Coach Stanley is OUT! I grow weary of a coach who has not been online since week #1. All matches against Stanley are forfeit to the end of the season. All teams will be awarded 2 standing points for their forfeit match.
Coach Frankenstein is OUT! He is bowing out of all FUMBBL league play. I suspect he has rage quitted the KPL and Settra once he finds out will pay him a visit. Due to only 3 games left in the regular season all his matches are deemed forfeit and 2 standing points will be awarded.
I have my eyes set on 2 more coaches who are getting Settra upset, we will see if they come around or need to be dealt with in a fair and even handed manner.
Only 3 matches left in the KPL season after today. The final sprint is set up for the top 3 spots in each of the 4 tournaments. It is time for those teams still in the hunt to make a final push and not spit the bit and lose. |
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Comish of the: |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 23, 2014 - 16:07 |
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NFC West VS East as turned into a 6 team race due to the demise of two teams. Season is not over yet and now it is a very tight race. |
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Comish of the: |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 25, 2014 - 15:21 |
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KPL morning update
Round 4 matches have been forfeited and standing points awarded. Synn and Lorebass have until Sat. morning to get their round 4 match played.
easilyamused and The_Murker have been dispatched by Settra and booted from the KPL. The details of their grim demise are still foggy and I will get back to you later on the grizzly tale.
4 Coaches taken out by Settra in 2 days. |
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Comish of the: |
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Cavetroll
Joined: Jan 21, 2009
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| Posted:
Apr 25, 2014 - 17:22 |
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Is this the demise of the KPL? Can the few dedicated coaches survive the loss of so many in so short a time?
Or will mighty Lord Settra replace the losses and help the KPL rise from the ashes like the Phoenix of legend?
Will a Khemri team ever hoist the KPL championship trophy above their heads?
Which thrall will win the dubious honor of 'Most Bites during a single season'?
Undying fans want to know the answer to these queries and more... |
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nerf indigo 2016 |
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Beerox
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
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| Posted:
Apr 25, 2014 - 17:31 |
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2 Undead and 1 Necro out.
Don't let the door hit you... well you know the rest |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 25, 2014 - 17:35 |
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Rah-ma briskly walks into the thorne room. The stench of death and decay is all around him. He comes around the corner of the dais and looks at Tomb King Settra sitting on his golden throne. His two handed sword is covered in dried blood. He has a smile on his face and is making small talk with the royal tomb guardians who stand in front of the throne.
"My King I have just received word that you have dispatched two more NFC coaches, that is a 25% reduction in 2 days!"
He is about to say more and stops, he looks at the feet of Settra. The decapitated head of The_Murker and easilyamused rest at his feet. The maggots have already begun their feast, crypt beetles crawl in their eye sockets and mouths. Flies surround the heads and the buzz can be heard across the room.
He takes a step back when he sees another severed head come rolling down the steps. Sigmar, Settras pet hyena, is using stanleys head like a chew toy. He bounds after it, kicks it farher ahead of him. He pounces on his head, licking the ichor off his scalp and then kicks it forward again out the front door of the thorne room, he goes running after the bouncing head.
Settra lets out a deep laugh at the sight.
"Oh, Rah-ma the pure joy of watching a hyena playing around and having fun, it reminds me of the days gone past of my youth."
"Yes, Iam sure you had a very interesting youth my Lord."
Settra stops laughing and gives Rah-ma that deep penetrating gaze.
"Why are you here Rah-ma? Intruding on my time of contemplation?"
"My Lord Iam simply distressed that you have killed off a large segment of the NFC coaches. I was wondering if I should be concerned of more dark tidings."
"Well you never know Rah-ma. I will admit Iam a little prickly right now with the NFC coaches but I think I have gotten rid of the slackers and beggars amongest our ranks. In fact I feel I have made the run to the playoffs more interesting for the remaining coaches. A lot of teams are now back in the running."
"Well that is true my Lord. I just think sometimes you need to stay your hand for the better of the KPL. Word gets out that you run a very tight ship might run off our replacement coaches."
"Oh, really? Well I think most coaches would love to be in a league when they know it is run tightly and smooth. Coaches know were the lines are and their expectation level is met. To many leagues with commisoners who are soft and do not have a firm grip."
"Well, you are King of all the lands of the dead, I will defer to your judgment on how to run a league."
Setta sits back in his throne with that deathly smile.
"Rah-ma are you almost ready for the announcement of season #3 and the changes you and I have talked about?"
"Yes, my Lord. Next week I will give the coaches the run down on the league structure changes, send out the call for replacements and go over the draft with all the coaches."
"Very good Rah-ma. Now I must attend to other issues of the Kingdom. I will be around later tonight for our daily briefing on KPL affairs."
Rah-ma bows as Settra walks by him, his tomb guardians flanking him. He watches as Settra stands in the door. Sigmar, his pet hyena, comes up to him with Stanleys head in his mouth. He drops it at Settras feet. Settra reaches down and picks up the head, punts it into the courtyard and Sigmar takes off in chase. Rah-ma can hear Settra laughing and having a grand old time.
***************************
3 games left in the KPL season. The run to the top 3 spots is on now. NFC conference has tightened up big time with the remaing 12 teams almost all in contention. |
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Comish of the: |
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Azure
Joined: Jan 30, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 25, 2014 - 20:42 |
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Prince Aidan and Asher quietly pad into the room, even quiet, Coach Azure's penetrating gaze locks onto them as he glances up from his war table. Charts and projections for each team in the league lay around the table. As the two princes watch, two more sheets are put ablaze.
"More competitors have been eliminated. Now what news do you two bring?"
Prince Aidan moves forward and delivers his report confidently, the gleam of his eyes unsettling even to his father.
"As expected the Tomb King is dispatching the riff-raff. Fewer and fewer obstacles in our path. The four teams that finished the divisional round of the KFC 3-0 are still around though. They all could be an issue."
The three of them gathered around the table to study the four teams that had been targeted after their division round success. Prince Aidan dropped into teacher mode as he ran down the list of teams.
"Quatar Heretics has continued to have success and are at 7-0 now. Nothing seems to be stopping them and our attempts to sneak a priest into their training grounds to destroy their tomb guardians was a complete failure. Alas, there is nothing we can do about them until playoff time."
"Lybaras Servitors are likewise 7-0. However, even though we are a newer team, we have already reached the same level of market penetration and our fanbase is just as high. Our use of wolfsbane has helped prevent the regeneration ability of their wolves and that has crippled their team. They are likely to fade down the stretch."
"Ka-Sabar Bedouin was 3-0."
Grins break out around the table...hungry, toothy grins. Although Aidan does rub his skull.
"After we crushed them in week 4, they have been unable to recover - struggling to regain their confidence. A few well placed bribes helped them have "bad luck" and at this point they are collapsing so badly they are unlikely to make the playoffs."
As Aidan comes to the last team, the temperature in the room seems to drop...cold anger fills his voice as he continues.
"Ka Sabar Conquerors we know well. They barely managed to defeat us in the divisional round - but we got our revenge. Unfortunately, otherwise they have not lost. We mauled them plenty in our game, but their regeneration seems to never fail. I have sent out some messages to a powerful necromancer who promises he can put a hex on them. Hopefully the payment will not be too excessive and we can take them down a notch."
Coach Azure considered the report and nodded.
"You both had served me well, but this campaign is not over. Pay the necromancer whatever he desires - our rivals will be destroyed - whatever it takes. We have no margin for error and no failure will be tolerated. Move all our assets into position. I want triple messages sent to our next opponent - he may be afraid and feign unavailability. If need be, we will storm their training field and destroy them where they stand. Nothing will stop us. NOTHING!"
The last was said with such great fury that both werewolves moved back and snarled in response. Coach Azure motioned for them to be dismissed - and they went back to their fellows with renewed vigor. Soon all would kneel before them! |
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WhatBall
Joined: Aug 21, 2008
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| Posted:
Apr 27, 2014 - 00:10 |
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Great write up.
The Bedouin are going to do everything they can, and buy whom they need, to make the payoffs and have their revenge. |
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