“So-called "Legal High" Elves Show Side-Effects

Top anchorman John Snow Mercy plunged the News Team into controversy today with his frank and open admission that straight-up killing a "legal high" elf made him feel good and frankly who was getting hurt? Opponents pointed to the grieving widows of high elves across the country who have become the unseen victims of this rapidly spreading trend.

An intervention was staged, with all the Team gathered in that room they use for the incredibly bad CGI bits of election night. "John", said Jeremy Vine, who was playing the part of a cowboy for reasons that are as yet unclear, "what y'all gotta think about is that we're worried 'bout yew. Tell 'em other Jeremy!"

Axeman stood up, fiddling nervously with the handle of his mighty axe* "The ridiculous Texan caricature is right, John", he began, "I thought it'd be nice to chop off heads, once upon a time. They called it 'skinking' as it was generally juvenile lizards that couldn't get away. I was addicted to skink for most of my twenties, John, and it was...it was..."

The group craned forward as Axeman visibly welled up with emotion

"...it was AWESOME, let's go KILL THINGS RIGHT NOW!"

The intervention was not a success.

(One of those games where I was able to gradually whittle down the elves, and they just couldn't pierce armour. Made a big mistake setting up at the end of the first half, should just have put sidesteppers up there, but fortunately the coin toss for overtime meant that wasn't fatal. K-fog was a pleasant and agreeable gentleman of the highest calibre throughout)

*This sentence sounds worse than I intended it to.”