“Ouch.

Well, not really, seeing as how I came away with a completely intact team, but it certainly wasn't for Amistad's lack of trying. The CryptoRats were clearly on a mission to do some serious damage to the delicate lads in green, and if it wasn't for the fact that Amistad's injury rolls were terrible, I think I might well have been looking at a whole bunch of journeyman games from now on.

But his injury rolls were terrible. So were a lot of his other rolls as well. Honestly, I've never seen someone with AG6 fail so often. And he wasn't the only one by a long way. In fact, the dice were pretty rubbish all game, for both of us.

Still, we did manage to have some fun in among all the failure. Let's see...

I messed up on my first drive - I'm doing that a lot these days by leaving my thrower unprotected and within range of an early blitz - and Amistad had the ball all the way down at my end zone by turn 2...at which point he ran it in for the score, then announced it had been a misclick because he had planned on getting in some easy fouls first! Needless to say, my sympathy was somewhat limited.

Then I showed him what my wood elves can do - mostly head straight for the KO box - but also score quickly. After that, the rats began their terrible run of terrible dice, and I was able to get the ball (on the second attempt, after I squeezed in a failed pick-up of my own) and keep it far enough away from the rats to prevent them scoring before the half.

But I did start the second half with three players staying out in the KO box. And this time, Amistad made sure he didn't score too quickly. So I had eight turns of bashing and fouling to contend with, leaving me with a rooted tree, a journeyman and a single useful lineman by the time the score finally came.

But still, nothing worse than a couple of BH to show for it - except the killed legendary thrower who was thankfully patched up by the apo.

My one turn attempt was then technically possible as I had six players to set up, and two of them were the aforementioned thrower and a sure-footed catcher. Amistad said he was worried, but I told him as long as I made the pass I'd be happy enough.

I failed the pass.

Next time I should keep my big mouth shut.

So there we go. A few bruises to nurse but nothing worse than that. I managed a respectable 3 for 30 in passing, made some reasonable cash and didn't lose any fans. I can live with that.”