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Scribbl 01 Finished

Issue 1, Summer 2603, Round 1












From the desk of the editor...
Welcome to the inaugural issue of SCRIBBL, the magazine devoted to the CIBBL league. This is the place to read about all of the dirty goings on, behind the scenes gossip, on the spot reporting as well as the fun and frolics that this league is known for.

Our team of top reporters will stop at nothing to get you all the inside scoops so keep reading to find out:
  • Page 2: You're here now, dummy
  • Page 3: Spotlight On... The Tor Anroc Anglers. With Bradrid Largegranite and Golfag.
  • Page 4: Calling the Youngblood Scramble. With Nigel Likely.
  • Page 5: Round 1 awards
  • Page 6: The Doctor's Surgery
  • Page 7: CIBBL Catch-Up
  • Page 8: Meet the Staff
  • Page 9: Let's Cook with Greasus/Meet the Star
  • Page 10: Small Ads
In conjunction with our sponsors at PaddyPow (the best odds on CIBBL action), we are pleased to be able to offer readers 10% off their first bet by using the promo code "dragonogre". This code can only be redeemed on site, by talking to big scary Dave, behind the stadium between the hours of 23:00 and 04:00. Come alone.
Tor Anroc Anglers
Coach: Neubau
Race: Sea Elf
Active Since: Spring, Season 1
Games Played: 28
Record: 16/7/5
Best Win: 3 – 0, vs vs Norse Dwarf
Worst Loss: 0 – 2, vs vs Lumbria
Highest TV: 1,960k on 2017-12-08
Most popular snack sold: Until recently crab legs, now shark fins are #1
Team song: Silentium by Arvo Pärt

All Time Stats
TopName#
GamesFirithas
Falandar
Lonlaithilon
Gethonil
28
Completions (84)Norlir
21
Touchdowns (37)Falandar
14
Interceptions (1)Linfarnrir
1
Casualties (62)Firithas
18
Most Valuable Player (28)Arathion
5
Star Player Points (461)Falandar
68
Passing (91)Norlir
45
Rushing (734)Falandar
279
Blocks (1160)Firithas
243
Fouls (12)Falandar
1

Current Roster
NameGames PlayedSPP
Gaezen620
Saeldovel725
Maerurhel411
Firithas2855
Falandar2868
Lonlaithilon2836
Norlir2734
Gethonil2810
Linfarnrir2620
Bhaiotlulon30
Arathion2632
Nuirlan2436
Aiuzirvel20



Interview with coach Neuabu

Coach Neubau

Hello readers, I'm Bradrid Largegranite. Due to a certain incident which shan't be mentioned again, the powers that be at CabalVision have forced their coaches to grant me unrestricted access to the teams this season. I'll be chatting to the coaches to ask about their teams and their coaching styles, grabbing a quick word with the players and I'll also be speaking to the behind the scenes staff: the groundsmen, the food vendors, the ladies who wash the jocks. And I won't be mentioning where pension funds have been spent. Now, without further ado I welcome our first interviewee, neubau, head coach of the Tor Anroc Anglers. Coach Neubau, thanks for joining me today

Neubau: Thanks for having me! We just got the first win of the season so you find me in an unusually pleasant mood.

Largegranite: Yes, congratulations on the victory. I noticed the stadium was absolutely packed with fans. How big an impact do fans of the Anglers have upon the team and staff?

Neubau: Often quite a lasting one, at least this time the thrown rock only stunned one of my two star players. But playing in front of huge crowds is always something special, our fans even created a battlecry for our team. It goes something like this: "BOO"

Largegranite: Yes, that was quite a deafening cry in the stands. Your team must be truly loved by their fans for them to shout with such passion.
You're playing in Styles Clash A this season, what preparation did you do over the off-season to prepare you for the upcoming fixtures?
Were you able to scout any of the opposing teams before the season start?

Neubau: I try to watch as many games as possible, either live in the stands where I can partake in the tradition of rock throwing myself, or with CabalVison's great ReWind feature. Of our current opponents we've only played the Coven of the Mirrored Hall, but apart from them they all something in common: far less armour, a lot more speed.

Largegranite: Without giving away too many of your secrets, how do you deal with the faster teams. One thing a lot of commentators have remarked upon is the curious choice that your team has made of favouring heavy armour over speed. For an elf team this is very unusual. Is there a rationale behind that choice?

Neubau: If only I knew, the elves of Tor Anroc are, erm, unusual? Different? Weird? The Ithilmar Armour is supposed to honour our god the Deep One Mathlann, but nobody can tell me why that is. Of course that changes the tactics a lot. You have to defend broad to prevent side switches and leave one or two sweepers in the backfield, but it also allows you to leave players in contact and play more aggressively on defense. That way you can force faster teams to take risks and either target their star players or force turnovers.

Largegranite: Did you have any coaching experience before you were hired by the Anglers? Have you been able to transfer skills and tactics from your previous roles?

Neubau: Almost none! I took the Anglers' head coach position a mere two months after I coached my first game of BloodBowl in an open format. Its been a learning process, but the success proves the Deep One's faith in me was valid.

Largegranite: What can you tell me about your god, the Deep One. I spoke to a few backroom staff when I was waiting for you to finish your previous appointment and they were quick to pledge their love for the Deep One.

Neubau: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Mathlann Tor Anroc wgah'nagl fhtagn.
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Mathlann Tor Anroc wgah'nagl fhtagn.
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Mathlann Tor Anroc wgah'nagl fhtagn.

ice cold chill felt in room, candles darken

Largegranite: Um, ok then, on to the next question. Are you ok there coach nuebau, your face darkened for a second. Do you need to take a minute?

Neubau: Hmm, what? Sorry I was somewhere else with my thoughts.

Largegranite: No trouble, I'm sure you have a lot on your plate and I really appreciate being given these few minutes of your time. I was going to ask you about your squad of players. A lot of them have been with the team for some time but a few new faces have slowly made themselves known. Gaezen especially has made his presence known, winning the prestigious Wave Rider Award for casualties after only 6 games!

Neubau: The Anglers are no team of 10 nobodies and one star like we see so often in CIBBL, every player is important. We pursue a next man up mentality. You mentioned Gaezen, who has joined the team quite recently after the Gold Disaster in Autumn made us sacrifice several players to the Deep One. He is, together with Firithas, the muscle of the team. Falandar has been the Anglers' captain since Ansodhil's demise and rewarded that trust with stellar performances in the Spring Regionals. Norlir and Nuirlan make sure the ball goes where its supposed to be. Everyone plays his part, the awards for almost half our players prove that. I couldn't be more happy with the team I have, only Guard is lacking a bit.

Largegranite: That must give a real sense of camaraderie to the team knowing that everybody is valuable and has a role to play
And the team must take pride from their performances too, care to comment briefly on the successes the team has seen through their time together

Neubau: We've had great success in the regionals, with one second place (that should have been a first, but the higher-ups in the league office decided to last minute add a fourth team, really crooked business) and two wins. The Anglers actually never lost a game in the Great Ocean and tied only once. A very close second place in summer 2602 was also a very good placement for us, but we won't talk about any autumn tournaments.

Largegranite: Well coach Neubau, I think we'll wrap up here. I'd like to thank you for being so generous with your time. Do you have any parting words for our readers?

Neubau: A pleasure! May the Deep One shine his darkness on all of you, also claws should be illegal.

Largegranite note: I had lined up interviews with both Arathion and Falandar (the team's top scorer) but after leaving the interview with Neubau I felt very unsure about myself. As though something had turned my eyes inside out and was looking at me from within. I headed back to my inn which, despite the somewhat fishy smell, was pleasant. I slept like a baby and woke up refreshed but was somewhat shocked to find I had slumbered for four days. My pillow was also damp with a salty taste and the sky was as dark as night, despite the time being close to noon. I could bear this place no longer.

Golfag's Graph Corner

"Lookit these lines ain't they pretty"

Who Will Win The Youngblood Scramble
- Nigel Likely (with data from The Predictatron)



The Problem with making prediction about fresh new teams in a league is that you have very few games to draw off on, other than previous experience with said teams and veteran coaches at the helms of new teams.

However, that second one is why I could say the Darkwood Sentinels have come out in front as the favorite for this competition, captainmalkor at the helm of an unpredictable and capricious team like the Red Crag Madcaps made an impressive showing even with the inconsistancy of the roster on many an occasion where the luck of the dice do not fail them. Therefore it would only be fair to assume that a team like the Dryads with a much less luck relient playstyle to engage, with in the hands of a man who could make a 2nd hand horse run like a thoroughbred will definitely be one to look out for

But what of their immediate competitors? 2nd seeded for the most likely to win big in this competition, the Edge of the World Climbers are a sight that strikes fear in the heart of all teams that rely on fast and delicate running plays with squishy and expensive players. A Dwarf roster, and alongside the BC Submarine Zhufbar and Karik Kadrin Slayers make up the representatives of the newly opened World Edge Mountain region and share their space with a lot of - lets be real here - squishy and brittle players with not much armour. And much like a ship through a treacherous channel, if you can't navigate around the wall you will be smashed on the rocks in short order. And this is not hyperbole, round 1 has ended with every dwarf team bar one winning their opening matches!



Tied for third place are two of some of the more bizarre rosters to feature in the league as a whole. First and foremost, The Crystal Maze Screamers featuring Daemons of Tzeentch, a roster that runs a mixture of Strength 2 and Strength 4 players with a smattering of TTM and considerable access to Mutation skills, seen a few times in both CIBBL and BIBBL many veterans know what to expect from them. Like most Daemon teams, when they lose players they start falling to bits but when they have the upper hand they'll drive a spike straight through your team's squishy bits. And this is before they start growing in skills, those ST4 Horrors come with GSM access as standard, and the stunty ST2 Horros are equipped with AM, given the time and the SPP points you an build a team that is ever changing against what your opponent may bring.

The second and possibly less well known roster, being the first debut of the team in both CIBBL and BIBBL at large are the Court of Shu, Air Elementals! And where do you start? First you start with the most eclectic skillset available to any linemen piece in the game, 7337 statline, Leap, Very Long Legs, Diving Catch, and GAP skill access. "Pardon?" I hear you say, "Three skills on a 60k player, and a smorgasbord of skills to choose from to boot? What's the catch?" The catch is those players that you would normally put on the LoS, you don't because they are AV 7, and the players that you instead put on there are your positionals, following me so far? And then you add your Elemental Big guy, 150k, 6538 Stats, Loner, Leap, Very Long Leg, Pass, Hail Mary Pass and AS access. Yeah you saw that right, a Big Guy that can LEAP on a 3+ and THROW the ball to any square on the field with a reroll included, crazy right!? A strange roster that has a few unique tricks up its sleeve, that will hopefully recover from their big Elemental getting kicked to death on the pitch by Dwarves game 1! Here's hoping anyway.

And finally a few of our anonmalous results and honourable mentions. A few viewers earlier may notice that the chart has 6 teams listed but there are actually 8, this was before the chart was made before the Slayer team, Karak Kadrin Slayers and the next Lybaras team, The Scorpian's Shadow entered the fray. How these two might have affected the voting we will never know but, from previous experience from the Autumn Granite Division last year in CIBBL, where the previous Lybaras team took first place, and the BIBBL world Mountain division where the Slayers are some of the most dangerous teams within that incredibly hardy region, they are most definitely sleeper hits and not something to gloss over any time soon.



Of course it wouldn't be Dwarf time without Engineers, because Dwarves love to cheat almost as much as they love to block, and here we have a roster full of all the dirty sneaky things a Dwarf can bring to the field and use with reckless abandon. They might not have the varied positionals like the vanilla Dwarves, or concentrated and furious killing power of the Slayers, but they have a lot of secret weapons in the hands of players a lot tougher than the other weapon heavy teams of the league such as Clan Skyre, Lybaras or the Goblins.

And finally we come to the Ahn Syn Zelax, the Khainite Assassin team and what to say. On the one hand, a lot of dangerous punching teams arranged versus your mostly low armour roster, that's bad. On the other hand a lot of those rosters also have low armour and you have a lot of stabbing and one chainsaw at your disposal, that's good! But back on the one hand you have a lot of Dwarves who are very much not low armour and are all equipped with ways to do terrible terrible violence to your squishy elf bones, that's bad. But then again, all your players are at least a good 2 MA faster than all of their team with AG4 on your side and only one team that actually has any Tackle starting out, that's good!

So in short, run from the players you can run from because they are very dangerous, smack the players you can't run from, because they'll usually be very fragile, and what ever you do don't get knocked down on the pitch because the other team /will/ stamp on you at the soonest opportunity.
Bilfrindal's Players of the Week
#RecordPlayerTeam#PlayerTeam#
CASRaja Raja CholaBhubaneswar Rampage5Gotrek Gurnisson
and
Pantheon Bane
~Karak Kadrin Slayers~
and
Malignant Curators
3
BlocksRaja Raja CholaBhubaneswar Rampage16Prince MoranionCharace Charioteers14
RushingNisadeiTrantio Dragon Hawks44Ka VikuAli's Anarchists39
TDsNisadei
and
Ka Viku
Trantio Dragon Hawks
and
Ali's Anarchists
3]]]
CMPsElpidaEye and Arrow3]


Bilfrindal's Game of the Week

Tough call this week but the award has to go to the Ninja Warriors vs Trantio Dragon Hawks match from the 25th. Any match with 5 touchdowns and a variety of serious injuries is going to rank fairly high and this was even better than that.

The fans turned out for the Warriors and they won the toss too, electing to receive. A lot of top pressure from the Dragon Hawks sees the Warriors being forced to score turn 5. TD by Anika Spike! 1-0 Warriors. At the reset, the only injured Warrior returns to the pitch from his KO while the KO'd Hawk remains out. 11 v 10 on the reset.

Landolf Grau starts the reset by equalizing the numbers by knocking out journeyman Brian Palebone and superstar catcher Nisadei secures the ball in a tight cage. A commotion is heard from the coaching area and a figure in black strides forward to the sideline, chanting and waving his hands. KRAKKKKK BOOM, a fireball streaks across the pitch, directly hitting Nisadei. Smoke. Confusion. The crowd wait with baited breath. Screams from inside the smoke and as it clears, the carnage is visible. Innocenzo is badly hurt and will play no further part in the game. Cressida is dead. But Nisadei is still standing proud with barely any dust on her. However the removal of her team mates has left her very exposed. The Warriors rush in, hoping to capitalize. Lei Zhang gets the hit but can only push her away, failing to remove the ball. The Hawks attempt a recovery, with Nisadei blitzing her way to safety with support from Landolf and Cassiopea. But the Hawks are outnumbered 8 to 10 and Rossana is dangerously close to the fans on the sideline. The Warriors decide to press home their player advantage by swamping the high elf blitzer Ghezioc and pushing him into the crowd, knocking him out in the process. 10 players vs 7. Lauren Loth of the Warriors blocks Valfredo, badly hurting him. 10 players vs 6. But the Warriors haven't marked Nisadei and the majority of their team is on the other side of the pitch. A chance for the Hawks! Nisadei runs up the field, going for it as quickly as she can and runs in the equalizer! 1-1.

The reset is not looking good for the Hawks though. The team apoth is seen speaking to coach MachJacob, while shaking his head. The teams jog back onto the pitch and the crowd gasp. Both Ghezioc and Odorico have not been cleared to take the field. The Hawks will only have 6 players this drive against a fully numbered Warriors team. The Warriors swarm the halfway line, eager for blood. All 3 of the Hawks are knocked down and the team swarm around Landolf, obscuring your narrators view. The crowd gasp again as there is no denying what is taking place. The ref blows his whistle, beckoning Kacy towards him while reaching in his pocket for a card. We wait. Is it a sending off? Whispered words between the ref and Kacy before a smile on the ref's face is greeted by a chorus of boos from the Hawks fans. Kacy is only sinbinned and will be back in the second half.

And it's time for the half time break, sponsored by Salamander Banking group.

Salamander: trust the cold blooded with your cold cash.


Welcome back sports fans. Second half of the Warriors Hawks game. 7 Hawks on the field and a full squad of 11 Warriors. The sun makes an appearence behind the crowd and suddenly it hits you. The heat. The sweltering heat. This bowl shaped stadium appears to be amplifying it. The exhausted players must be despairing as a full half of blood bowl remains to be played. Let's get to it.

Hawks receive with Nisadei in the back field, awaiting the kick, which arrives deep. The Hawks try to make their presence felt on the line but to no avail as they can do no more than knock down some Warriors. Nisadei secures the ball. The Warriors once again swarm the Hawks, using their superior numbers to push around the opposing team. Brian Palebone marks Nisadei but she looks like she could easily outrun him. And she does, running up the sideline, flanked by two of her team mates. This will be a nervous few turns for the Warriors. The Warriors strike, knocking down a Hawk who was flanking Nisadei, leaving her in a precarious position on the sideline, surrounded by Warriors. All hope looks lost. You can feel the tension in the air. Time slows as she expertly dances between the outstretched arms and legs of Warriors, who are desperate to take her down. She pushes back Lauren Loth and moves through the gap heading for the endzone. Go for it Nisadei! Go for it! ahem She runs in the touchdown and the stadium erupts. The heat and the emotion causing a cacophany of sound. What a moment.

The Hawks have the lead but it's still early in the second half and once again they find themselves outnumbered. Ghezioc is still unable to play and Arnbjorn the Hound is exhausted so will sit this drive out meaning the Hawks once again field 6 players. As the Warriors regroup, no doubt after a stern talking to, they look fewer in number. No Josh Levin, no Brian Palebone. Maybe the literal ray of sunshine has proved a figuritive ray of sunshine for the Hawks as they are now only outnumbered 3:2.

The next few turns are messy. Rossana breaks her leg after a vicious hit from Asher Manbeck. Landolf Grau is stunned from a hit by Anika. Kacy once again applies the boot, smiling at the ref as she makes no attempt to hide it. The smile drops from her face as he reaches into his pocket. She rushes up to him and a heated exchange takes place but to no avail. Red card. You're outta here! But these theatrics have distracted us from Odorico, the boot recipient. Odorico is not in a good way and will play no further part in the game. A worthy exchange some might say but certain sport commentators still hold players to a high standard and don't appreciate these underhanded tactics. /Boo I say. /Boo. 4 Hawks remain against 8 Warriors. Halfway through the half.

Nisadei bravely skips through the Warriors, marking Aidan with the ball but is swarmed by the rest of his team, who cruelly throw her to the groud, stunning her. The rest of the Hawks face the same fate as they are surrounded and all take their share of hits. Aidan contemplates stalling with the ball but a shouted instruction from the coach sees him run it in for the touchdown! 2-2 and coach Azure can smell a victory.

Reset with time running out and there's 5 Hawks on the pitch against 8 Warriors. Ghezioc is back and Arnbjorn too. Kick goes south, mid depth and is gathered by Ghezioc as Nisadei runs up the field. The plan is clear. A pass, a catch, a score. Can the Hawks pull it off. A defence is mustered by the Warriors by they fail to correctly mark Nisadei as Josh Levin trips as he rushes to mark her. It looks like her recovers but no, he falls to the ground at Nisadei's feet. My word, what a time for such theatrics! Arnbjorn and Thodik Deephelm work in tandem, clearing a path for Ghezioc to make the pass. He does and the ball spirals perfectly into the waiting hands of Nisadei. What action! She just needs to dodge free from the clutches of Brian Palebone. We hold our breath. Silence in the stadium. She feints one way, then the other, and as he lunges to the right she moves to the left, expertly breaking free from his clutches and dashing to the line, pure adrenaline fuelling her every step. What a touchdown.

The game looks decided now but the ref decides we have time for a restart. The players take the pitch but the Warriors fans are unhappy, feeling they have been denied a clear victory. Rubbish rains down on the players, stones, bottle of bloodweiser, even pieces of the stadium. Both Cassiopea and Thodik take nasty hits, knocking them to the floor.

Restart. Landolf Grau is knocked out but the Warriors look like their heart isn't in it anymore. They gather around Thodik Deephelm who is writhing, clutching his head. The crowd hush and a clear racial slur is heard before Lei Zhang stomps down on Thodik's head. Sickening crack. Pause. Pause. A chorus of emotions from the crowd. Warriors fans have had their blood lust sated while Hawks fans are screaming at the ref, who blows his whistle, symbolising the end of the game. Final score 3-2 to the Hawks.

Player of the match: Nisadei. 3 touchdowns and arguably the best performance this writer has ever seen. A true linchpin for the team and a nobrainer for MVP.

And just for our readers, we have secured an exclusive image of the moment in which the wizard's fireball engulfed the pitch. Warning, footage is not suitable for young children or the elederly or infirm.



Bilfrindal's Golden Banana

Every so often you see something that just makes you go huh. I present troll Uli of the Goblin Revolushunary Kommittee:


Congratualtions coach pokrjax, this is yours:



Bilfrindal's Ones To Watch

We've got some cracking fixtures coming up. Here's what I'm looking forward to:
Blood-Ground Blackhorns vs Strigos Elită in Styles Clash B
Coven of the Mirrored Hall vs Lords of the Silent Death in Styles Clash A
True Roots of Khaine vs Talsyn Tramplers in Exotic Creature Challenge (A)

The Doctor's Surgery...
Another week passes and with it near constant knocks at my office door. And a similar situations in doctor's offices all over the land thanks to this insanely violent sport. However I fear my words will fall on deaf ears. *sigh* The list of this weeks injuries are as follows
  • 108 players badly hurt. These players were dispatched home after a brief visit.
  • 5 broken jaws, 3 broken ribs, 1 fractured arm, 5 fractured legs, 1 gouged eye, 3 groin strains, 1 pinched nerve and 3 smashed hands. These players will make a full recovery but I have strongly advised that they miss their next game to allow time for healing.
  • 4 broken necks. These players will take time to recover but will never be as agile.
  • 5 smashed ankles and 4 smashed hips. With a bit of rest, these players will walk again but they will never be as fast.
  • 1 serious concussion and 2 fractured skull. Who knows why these players would wish to continue their blood bowl careers but their armour will never be able to protect them as well as it once did.
  • 4 smashed collar bones. I've advised these players that they will never fully regain their strength.
  • 3 damaged backs and 6 smashed knees. Despite my best work, these injuries will niggle these players for the rest of their careers.

And finally we come to the most severe of injuries, one which only a few players can recover from with the help of a rare healing potion. I speak of death, mort, the final ride. These players are no more. And they could be you unless you protect yourself on the field.

I do wish you'd
take better care of
yourself
Gone But Not Forgotten
NameTeamSPP at deathSkills at deathMatch
Cressida RosenblattTrantio Dragon Hawks17Catch
Diving Catch
Dodge
Animosity
Block
Side Step
Link
DharekStone Prince's Men0Thick SkullLink
Painz ArrysunDer Peaksblight Stealers6Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Dirty Player
Link
ScabeiathraxGardeners of Nurgle7Disturbing Presence
Foul Appearance
Nurgle's Rot
Regeneration
Block
Link
Ommo SeCourt of Shu3Diving Catch
Leap
Very Long Legs
Link
Ashu MasCourt of Shu0Leap
Hail Mary Pass
Pass
Very Long Legs
Loner
Link
EsghocCrystal Maze Screamers0Dodge
Big Hand
Right Stuff
Stunty
Link
Zak TunneldwellerBC Submarine Zhufbar0Block
Dirty Player
Kick
Thick Skull
Link
IronspineFangsnapper's Clawpack0Link
Mannfred von CarsteinNehekhara Nightwings0Blood Lust
Hypnotic Gaze
Regeneration
Pro
Link
Kanut NardhonDukes of Earthquake Valley10DodgeLink
Ghost of BoudicaLondinium's Lunatics0Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Titchy
Link
DelamarreLondinium's Lunatics14Frenzy
Thick Skull
Block
Link
Carol IIStrigos Elită5Claw
Blood Lust
Hypnotic Gaze
Regeneration
Link
Grashnak BlackhoofStar PlayerFrenzy
Mighty Blow
Thick Skull
Horns
Loner
Link
HiroSecret Cult Of Shiamoto22Block
Guard
Link
Yibb-TstllCoven of the Mirrored Hall48Dodge
Foul Appearance
Right Stuff
Stunty
Titchy
Block
+AG
Big Hand
Link
Blind WolfShroomwood Attercops3Dodge
Right Stuff
Stunty
Link
BiròqMisty Isle Gators52Dodge
Block
+AG
Sure Hands
+AG
Link


Lissen up kidz, itz yer boy Carlos Tuffjaw ere and ave I got de goodz for yewz. I nikked dis ere Kam-ra from da Thoughts of Thoth changing room, dey werent using it. Iz bin oppin on de kart dat deyz teemz travvel in to getz frum game too game and iv bin cachin all de akshun. Dunt tell dem gitz at Cabalvishun, iz bin givin de tapes to me mate on de Norscan Curse boat, currently docked in a nearby cove. A real pirate bay. Anywayz, chekk em out wile youz kan.

Youngblood Scramble
Darkenwood Sentinels (Dryad) vs ~Karak Kadrin Slayers~ (Slayer): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
BC Submarine Zhufbar (Engineers) vs Crystal Maze Screamers (Daemons of Tzeentch): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Court of Shu (Air Elemental) vs Edge of the World Climbers (Dwarf): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Ahn Sye Zelax (Khainite Assassins) vs Scorpion's Shadow (Lybaras): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Mushroom Scramble
Gardeners of Nurgle (Nurgle) vs Der Peaksblight Stealers (Night Goblin): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Charace Charioteers (Pro Elf) vs Grim Queens (Lahmian): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Seekers of Transcendence (Spawn of Chaos) vs Fangsnapper's Clawpack (Clan Mors): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Springbok Sprites (Kurnous) vs Mordkin Headtakers (Skaven): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Cup of Ancient Knowledge
Library of Indra (Simiyn) vs Thoughts of Thoth (Khemri): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Offa's Hearthweru (Vampire) vs Tomb Guardians of the Tower (Rasetra): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Nehekhara Nightwings (Von Carstein) vs Lost Golems of Grungni (Earth Elemental): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Explosion's Edge
Black Chasm Overlords (Clan Pestilens) vs Goblin Revolushunary Kommittee (Goblin): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Rotfall Ironworks Rocketeers (Clan Skryre) vs Dukes of Earthquake Valley (High Elf): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Unfettered Fury (Daemons of Khorne) vs Gobskrav Alliance (Underworld): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Ali's Anarchists (Numas) vs Londinium's Lunatics (Albion): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Styles Clash (B)
Malignant Curators (Malal) vs Strigos Elită (Strigoi): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Blood-Ground Blackhorns (Beastmen) vs Secret Cult Of Shiamoto (Northern Nippon): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Styles Clash (A)
Modryn's Midnight Meddlers (Wood Elf) vs Coven of the Mirrored Hall (Tzeentch): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Eye and Arrow (Avelorn) vs Tor Anroc Anglers (Sea Elf): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Vile Cauldron
Hellbound Firebats (Fire Elemental) vs Brothers Of Malice (Daemons of Malal): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Way of the Dragon (Blood Dragon) vs Doom Glade Demons (Dark Elf): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Pleasure Strings (Slaanesh) vs Everlasting Vultures of Settra (Zandri): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Eternal Ecstasy (Daemons of Slaanesh) vs Tower of the Necromancer (Necrarch): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Tsunami Terrors (Water Elemental) vs Clar Karond Black Widows (Witch Elf): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Norscan Curse (Undead Pirates) vs Nurgle Plaguebearers (Daemons of Nurgle): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Exotic Creature Challenge (B)
Thirteenth Circle Abominations (Clan Moulder) vs Shroomwood Attercops (Forest Goblin): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Bear Clutchers (Lumbria) vs Crimson Fins (Sons of Stromfels): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Exotic Creature Challenge (A)
Misty Isle Gators (Fimir) vs Sport Spawning Zlatlan (Skink): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
True Roots of Khaine (Treemen) vs Oyxl Great Pyramid Heroes (Snakemen) - Match abandoned

Lesser Dragon Grapple
Vostok Iron Head  (Norse) vs Knightly Virtues (Bretonnian): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Congregation of Holy Touchdown (Sisters of Sigmar) vs Kislev's Gryphon Legion (Kislev): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Grand Celestial Delegate (Cathay) vs Sartosa Black Flags (Pirates of Sartosa): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

Greater Dragon Grapple
Stone Prince's Men (Border Princes) vs Bhubaneswar Rampage (Kingdoms of Ind): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Trantio Dragon Hawks (Tilea) vs Ninja Warriors (Nippon): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Montetriste Noblemen (Estalia) vs Reik River Kicking Mules (Half-Elf): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay
Nejaz Djinn (Araby) vs Grasparossa B.B.C (Human): Match Report, Spoiler Free Replay

In association with

Meet The Staff

Name: Grot Snotson
Position: Editor
Likes: Forest Goblin cuisine
Dislikes: grammar chorfs
In 10 years will be: retired
Name: Carlos Tuffjaw
Position:
Digital Performance Analyst
Likes: Bootleggin
Dislikes: DMCA
In 10 years will be:
making snotling snuff films

Name: Edmund Highnose
Position: Fashion Correspondent
Likes: this really cool team,
you haven't heard of them
Dislikes: whatever you're into
In 10 years will be: unemployed

Name: Bradrid Largegranite
Position: Chief Interviewer
Likes: changing her hair style
Dislikes: mining, hammers, rocks
In 10 years will be: whatever she
wants to be

Name: Greasus Legsnapper
Position: Chef
Likes: locally grown ingredients
Dislikes: laundry day
In 10 years will be: hosting
cooking show on CabalVision

Name: Bilfrindal
Position: Predictor
Likes: modern technology
Dislikes: premature baldness
In 10 years will be: still here

Name: Nigel Likely
Position: Journalist
Likes: early mornings
Dislikes: gum disease
In 10 years will be: winning a Pulitzer

Name: Fidgit Dipstik
Position: Illustrator
Likes: colours!
Dislikes: don't kill my vibe, man!
In 10 years will be: high as a kite





The Scribbl would also like to thank the following people for their help with this issue: datom, neubau, Rbthma, TheNabster, AutoAxpert. A shame we couldn't find a single photographer who would take their photos, no matter how much we offered.


Bake your own... Rock Cakes
(With Greasus Legsnapper)


Rocks are all the rage in stadiums across the land so why not experience the joy of a well timed rock from the comfort of your own home by baking some rock cakes.

Here's what you need:
225g/8oz ground bone (grade 0 or 00)
75g/2½oz honey
125g/4½oz butter
150g/5½oz gravel
1 free-range egg
1 tbsp water

Method
Greasus says "first wash your hands"

Preheat the oven to hot but not too hot and line a baking tray with an old copy of The Scribbl.

Mix the bone and honey in a bowl and rub in the butter until the mixture looks like breadcrumbs, then mix in the gravel.

In a clean bowl, beat the egg and water.

Add the egg mixture to the dry ingredients and stir with a spoon or finger until the mixture just comes together as a thick, lumpy dough. Add a bit more water if you really need it to make the mixture stick together.

Place snotling-sized lumps of the mixture onto the prepared baking tray. Leave space between them as they will flatten and spread out to double their size during baking.

Bake for 15-20 minutes, until golden-brown. Remove from the oven, allow to cool for a couple of minutes then turn them out onto a wire rack to cool.

Greasus says " why not share pictures of your creations by following us on FaceBlock. Just search for "cooking with Greasus" and don't believe any of those lies that are written on my page. I was found not guilty and anyway, that family wanted to be cooked. Click the link below!"


Greasus says "cooking is a great
way to bring the family together"


Stars in their eyes
Edmund Highnose sits down with Vin Ridfish

Vin, tell us a bit about yourself?
I grew up as a fisherman and part-time can opener on the Old World Coast, where my particular talents meant I had a steady stream of work. That said, I was always a sporting type, and enjoyed boxing, although I found it increasingly difficult to find sparring partners.

Recently you made your first CIBBL appearance, turning out for the Crimson Fins
I've known Cap'n Dirk Bloodlust for years, back when he was just regular Bos'un Dirk Bloodlust, and he thought it was a great opportunity for me to combine my passion - stabbing people - with something that was genuinely useful for the wider Sons of Stromfels community.

You've spoken before about how important your religion is to you?
I was running with a bad crowd, but I was lucky and found the worship of Shark God when I did. It helped me get some structure and focus to my life, and helped me find an honest job rather than continuing down the wrong tracks, and becoming an outlaw or tax accountant.

Where did you get that delightful red ensemble you're wearing?
I was lucky enough to take a trip to Altdorf, you wouldn't believe the range of shops they have there, you can get anything. I found a tailor in a small alley and the things he was saying about thread count and colour contrast really connected with me. I got him to make me two of these, one in red, which is a more everyday outfit, and then a blue one for special occasions.

One last thing : how do you wash in the morning?
Carefully.


Milk gone sour? Cows jumped the paddocks? By Shallya's tears you've got boggarts! Get professional help now- contact Bornadus Helyrfyus, gardener, handyman, raconteur extraordinaire and specialist in spirit appeasment rituals. Affordable rates and will travel anywhere within Brettonia and Albion. Leave message at the Drowned Rat in MarienburgLost: young dragon-ogre, barely hatched and vulnerable. Last seen scaling a cliff north of the Altar of Ultimate Darkness during a massive chaos storm . Responds to Nubblywinks and his favourite treats -pickled fling. A most pleasurable reward awaits those who return him swiftly- Mistress Sauthenn Lashspike, heartbroken in Naggarond
Those of pure heart shall head to Kutenholz to attend to the building of a new shrine to Sigmar, followed by a purge of the evil beastmen in the dark forests south of the Mirror Moors! May Sigmar guide your hand! All glory to Sigmar! - Otto Glaubrecht, priest of Sigmar, AltdorfI, Jeremiah Snotson, do hereby state my intention of declaring the free people's republic of Snotvania. We will be marching en masse this coming Monday to nail our theses to the Schlosskirche door. Unless it's raining. And my leg isn't playing up.
David Grottyhawk the journeyman was granted no luck,
the dread line of scrimmage forever he was stuck.
Five games then six with nary a block,
the coach then pondered "was he of ill stock?"
A brief respite that match which was his twelth,
where barely did he manage to cripple a weak elf.
A shame then his thirteenth and final it was,
he was skewered quite promptly by a looney named Wazoz!

Ode to David Grottyhawk - unknown
From this day forward, in the presence of these witnesses and under the watchful eye of my god, I promise to respect myself and others by saying no to going for it until I'm married
Screamo vocalist looking for bandmates. Influences are Funeral Mist, Anaal Nathrakh, and early Goatlord (pre 2498 IC). Reply ASAP to Kyrvin Bloodruse on the dreaded Ark Varkzol in the Sea of Chaos. Can provide own slavesAvast ye hearties! Setting sail on the high seas next fortnight we be, c'ept a few bodies shy for bunks you see. If'n you like rum and booty, climb a mast like a monkey then a berth we have for ye!" - Cap'n Nalbor of the Salty Rager, Bilbali
You: half-orc hottie in full-plate who started the brawl in the Wet Dwarf tavern last Festag of Sommerzeit. Me: Shy priest of Taal who couldn't keep his eyes off you...buy you a round sometime?
We Want You!!
Do you have what it takes to write for The Scribbl? A new issue comes out every 10 days and we are always looking for new authors. If you have an idea for an article then contact the editor here. Do it now!!!