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The_Great_Gobbo
Last seen 9 hours ago
Overall
Emerging Star
Overall
Record
13/12/110
Win Percentage
14%
Archive

2023

2023-12-09 13:15:29
rating 5
2023-07-14 11:39:16
rating 5.4
2023-07-03 14:34:20
rating 6

2022

2022-10-12 17:17:39
rating 5
2022-10-11 12:59:18
rating 6

2021

2021-09-07 12:21:33
rating 5.4

2020

2020-05-08 11:52:23
rating 6
2020-04-24 14:33:57
rating 5.5
2020-04-18 14:56:01
rating 5.9
2020-03-26 17:11:33
rating 5.8
2020-03-26 01:47:40
rating 5.5

2018

2018-01-05 12:15:30
rating 5.4

2017

2017-12-27 16:43:51
rating 5.5
2017-03-01 21:20:56
rating 6

2016

2016-12-12 17:33:50
rating 5.9
2016-12-08 21:04:33
rating 6
2016-12-07 21:09:17
rating 6
2016-12-06 17:59:32
rating 6
2016-10-06 08:51:41
rating 5.7
2016-04-20 19:06:50
rating 5.8
2016-01-18 08:46:18
rating 5.8

2015

2015-12-24 12:58:46
rating 5.4
2015-10-12 15:43:14
rating 6
2015-10-05 15:10:52
rating 6
2015-10-01 14:42:06
rating 6
2015-08-06 15:36:54
rating 5.7
2015-07-17 00:28:10
rating 5.8
2015-07-15 15:22:22
rating 6
2015-06-30 11:54:03
rating 5.9
2015-04-22 14:17:08
rating 5.6
2015-04-20 12:52:18
rating 5.6
2015-04-10 01:05:15
rating 5.5
2015-03-17 00:43:05
rating 5.7
2015-03-12 14:31:14
rating 6
2015-03-11 00:24:39
rating 5.8
2015-03-04 13:54:35
rating 6
2015-03-02 15:21:24
rating 5.3
2015-02-23 15:46:24
rating 6
2015-02-19 12:56:45
rating 6
2015-01-22 12:58:39
rating 5.6
2015-01-20 18:36:18
rating 6
2015-01-20 13:55:35
rating 5.7
2015-01-13 17:42:41
rating 6
2015-01-12 14:19:44
rating 5.6
2015-01-01 18:21:17
rating 6

2014

2014-12-31 10:04:22
rating 5.7
2014-12-30 10:59:38
rating 6
2014-12-23 09:56:24
rating 6
2014-12-10 14:26:16
rating 5.9
2014-12-09 19:10:26
rating 6
2014-12-01 09:22:30
rating 6
2014-11-29 11:30:56
rating 5.9
2014-11-26 18:07:55
rating 6
2014-11-09 22:35:16
rating 6
2014-11-07 12:26:08
rating 6
2014-11-06 11:55:47
rating 6
2014-11-03 13:49:56
rating 6
2014-10-28 21:49:57
rating 6
2014-10-28 19:50:01
rating 6
2014-10-24 11:36:26
rating 5.9
2014-10-23 11:43:20
rating 6
2014-10-21 01:42:26
rating 5.9
2014-10-19 22:19:28
rating 6
2014-10-17 23:39:15
rating 6
2014-10-13 23:48:20
rating 6
2014-10-01 15:24:43
rating 5.9
2014-09-26 17:01:02
rating 5.9
2014-09-25 20:40:17
rating 6
2014-09-23 14:10:11
rating 6
2014-09-16 15:35:31
rating 6
2014-09-16 00:15:22
rating 6
2014-09-11 16:16:54
rating 5.8
2014-09-11 16:16:54
28 votes, rating 5.8
THE END TIMES ARE NIGH!!!!!!
DER GREEN TIDE 4 - 1 GODAILLE

A KO! MAGAZINE WORLD EXCLUSIVE

Mystics, soothsayers, shamen, clairvoyants and other members of the Allied Guild of Charlatans have all declared that the end times are upon us, why? Are rumours of Nagash's return true? Have cats started barking? No, it's worse and weirder than that, it's because for the first time EVER Der Green Tide have WON A GAME! Over now to your Goblin commentator Boggle Lillylion for the match highlights.

"Der wevva is perfik ere tuday at der Badlandz Community Swamp fer a game o Blud Bowl tween der Green Tide an sum gitz in evenin wear, Godaille. It seemz az tho yezterdayz draw az broht out der fanz, wiv ovva 10,000 gobbo's supportin der Tide compared ter only 5,000 of der ovverz.

Godaille receive der kik an strait away der Tide showz dey meen busynezz wiv Greeda Stinkbreff KO'in a frall called Le Biberonmer wiv a luvvly fowl ter der ead. Emboldened by diz, Slimy Swetboy KO's anuvva frall called Le Pochtron wiv a vichuz blok an sum brass nukklez. AND ANUVVA FRALL IS DOWN! Diz time itz Le Gobelotteur oo seemz ter av a broken nekk after dat blokk frum Stinky Badgaz. It definatly seemz like diz iz an intentional plan frum der Great Gobbo az wun of dem bludsukkerz, I fink YES itz Charles Lichetron az walked in untuched fer der tuchdurn, an we iz only alf way froo der furst alf! Lets see wot der Tide kan do wiv der ball.

It lookz like der Tide av kum out in der famuz 'evil eye' furmatchun but der game plan iz definatly ter pikk on der fralls az der goez anuvva wun, Le Soiffeur iz badly urt by dat blokk frum Tuska Pigface. Datz annoyed vampire Alexis Cheulard oo frakturez Gnash Doomspiderz skull wiv a nasty blokk. Wait, wotz diz? Yeruk Blacknail andz der ball off ter Grim Toejam. Hanga Leftere az dodged iz marker an iz free in der end zone but dere iz no way ee kan mek diz - TURCHDURN TIDE!!!!! Inkredible long bomb frum Toejam rite on der money fer Leftere an itz 1-1!

Ang on, der bludsukkerz ent rite! Dey iz gaspin an signalling fer a drink but no wun kan enta der pitch AN LOOK AT DAT! Both Louis Fesse-Pinte an Alexis Cheulard av bitten der own teem matez AN DER BALL IZ LOOSE! Cheulard iz still fursty an itz bye bye Le Lampeur III, an dat iz der alf time wistle.

Der assistant manager for Godaille iz moanin at der ref, I fink ee iz tryin ter say dat der Green Tide av put salt in iz teemz barrel ov bludd! Der ref iz avvin nun of it tho an der sekkund alf kikz off, der Tide receive an instantly brek out inter da finga foor furmatchun. Godaille ignore der downfield recieverz an rush Blacknail der ball carrier. Lichetron seemz ter av im in der bak field, NO WAIT, BLACKNAIL WRIGGLEZ FREE! Ee dodgez wun, dodgez too an tries a long pazz down der sideline ter Leftere, but it lookz like eez ovva kooked it - NO IT'S KAUTT!!! A freek gust o wind keepz der ball in an itz kautt by Leftere an itz an eezy jog down der line fer a TUCHDURN, AN DER TIDE LEED 2-1 AT DER START OF DER SEKUND ALF!

Der sun dodgerz getz der ball but dey iz still not rite AN LICHETRON IZ EETIN IZ OWN TEEM AGEN! Wotz diz? Fisse-Pinte pinches a nerve on Pigface, eez urt im an now eez bit im, but look at iz face, JUZ LOOK AT IZ FACE! Ee atez der taste an ee az run off der pitch yelling fer sum mouff wash! Now Lichetron andz ovva da ball ter frall L'Ecluseur but ee iz terrified of getting bit an fumblez der ball! Itz picked up by Blakk And an anded off ter Evil Plaugeface on der alfway line, AN DEY WUNT KATCH IM! Lichetron iz so mad ee bitez L'Ecluseur anyway AN ITZ 15, 10, 5, TUCHDURN GREEN TIDE!! I dunt believe dis, alfway froo der sekkund alf an der Green Tide iz winnin free wun! Kan dey actually win a game?

Lazt chance fer der bludsukkerz, oo punch a ole froo der Tide line an Cheulard lookz set ter skore - NO!! EEZ TRIPPED AN DER BALL IZ LOOSE!!!! Leftere sprintz bakk, pikks up der ball frum under der nose of Lichetron, attempts an insane pazz ter Blacknail WHO KATCHEZ IT! Blacknail down der sideline, dere are sum gobbo's on der pitch, dey fink itz all ovva, Blacknail andz der ball ovva ter And AN IT IZ NOW, TUCHDURN!!!!!

WE IZ DER BEST IN DER WURLD! WE AZ BEETEN DER BLUDSUKKERZ! COUNT DUCKULA, COUNT CHOCULA, COUNT DRACULA, COUNT VON COUNT WE AZ BEETEN DEM ALL, WE AZ BEETEN DEM ALL! NEFERATA, KAN YOOZ EAR ME? NEFERATA, YER BOYZ TUK WUN ELL OVVA BEETIN! YER BOYZ TUK WUN ELL OVVA BEETIN!"

Full match here
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Comments
Posted by PainState on 2014-09-11 16:34:22
Rated a 6 for the win and a 4 because a goblin team with out their chainsaw, well, that is just boring.

So in the end a 5.
Posted by DrPoods on 2014-09-11 18:59:09
A Norwegian Goblin doing the commentary? Such a variety of staff Green Gobbo!

Grats.
Posted by The_Great_Gobbo on 2014-09-11 19:34:11
A) Itz der GREAT Gobbo not der green gobbo, ee iz sum gurl on a skateboard an
B) Wot iz Norway? Boggle iz frum Norsica.

Now sit up strait an payz attenchun!
Posted by roante on 2014-09-11 19:49:30
Pure awesomness :-D Where's the game link?
Posted by Badoek on 2014-09-11 19:58:01
PainState, a 5? /boo /boo /boo /stomp
You're just don't like competition when it comes to fluff. ;)

Rated 6 again for awesomeness (of both the win AND the blog).
I do wonder how long you can keep this up. Both playing (not winning) and writing. :)
Posted by charlie1331 on 2014-09-11 22:43:23
Had the pleasure of playing Der Green Tide and it remains one of the most fun games I've ever played. Kudos on the win, hopefully it won't take you another 50 matches for your next victory.
Posted by the_Sage on 2014-09-11 23:24:59
Wow, 1/1/48 huh? Keep up the writing ;)
Posted by grant85 on 2014-09-12 03:37:33
CON-GEEEE-RATS!
Posted by flashgordon1 on 2014-09-13 00:02:19
i would love to see the replay of this match. you should proudly post the link for it on your teams page
Posted by The_Great_Gobbo on 2014-09-14 18:55:43
I wudz if I kud but I dunno ow, I looked on derguidefing an didn't unnerstand nun of it. If sunwun else kan linky it den feel free