eisen
Joined: Nov 24, 2005
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 Posted:
Sep 23, 2011 - 23:07 |
 
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Most of this stuff is pretty basic but we do have a few new coaches with us this season, so to avoid any mishaps I'll lay out a few ground rules.
1. Play yer games. Anyone missing a deadline leaves their fate to my tender mercies. Typically I'll give a warning first, but removal from the league is also an option here.
2. Keep me updated on scheduling conflicts. If your having trouble scheduling your game let me know. If your dear great aunt gets struck by lightning and you'll be away for a few days let me know. If a game gets missed I'll always forefit in favor of the person who keeps in contact.
3. Don't be a jerk. Whining, pissing, moaning, and general douche behaviour will not be tolerated. Yes I know Azure is in the league, try to cope the best you can. If I catch any of this nonsence I give myself a free hand in issuing sanctions. |
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licker
Joined: Jul 10, 2009
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| Posted:
Sep 23, 2011 - 23:10 |
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eisen
Joined: Nov 24, 2005
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| Posted:
Sep 23, 2011 - 23:20 |
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4 is top secret  |
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ryanfitz
Joined: Mar 24, 2009
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| Posted:
Sep 24, 2011 - 00:10 |
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| licker wrote: | | ryanfitz wrote: | i can't wait to hear the ex con predictions and compare
Oh yeah, you're crazy to put my elves last in the east, they will be playing for the conference title right up until the end |
I dunno...
I mean it's a strong team, but the amount of POMB you will face... gonna have to have some luck to have a functional team left after going through these first 3 games.
Your St5 Catcher is going to die though. Mark my words on that  |
lawl, MonAmi lost 13 players to RIPs last season (next closes team was 6 or 7), and still went to the playoffs, i predict Braylon has a 50% chance to get out of the divisional round unharmed and/or alive |
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ahalfling
Joined: Aug 16, 2008
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Sep 24, 2011 - 02:55 |
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| licker wrote: | | Your St5 Catcher is going to die though. Mark my words on that |
They'll have to bury him in an oversized coffin.
In fact, it might be time to order TWO oversized coffins, because I suspect that even if he does die, he's outliving Krispy's ST5 MV8 wood elf lino. |
_________________
Beat Claw, Play AV7
(Hell, I ran a forward passing orc team back in the '90s. You probably shouldn't listen to me. Ever.) |
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eisen
Joined: Nov 24, 2005
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Sep 30, 2011 - 16:18 |
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Time marches on! Deadline for Week 2 games is 10/7 Good job to all our new coaches for getting their games in on time! We do have one hanging week 1 game that has been granted an extension due to a scheduled vacation. Good luck everyone! |
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licker
Joined: Jul 10, 2009
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Sep 30, 2011 - 16:21 |
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Well I failed to kill Braylon, but he acted like a total chicken and sat out the 2nd half, cowering on the bench like the elf puss he is.
Bull Bullichick was so incensed by Braylons act of cowardice he took out his frustration on the 2 loners the Dauphins conned into playing for them. Niggleing one and killing the other.
Ahh what could have been eh? If Braylon's belly wasn't yellow and his ass stuffed with chicken feathers. |
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Krispy
Joined: Jul 20, 2009
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Sep 30, 2011 - 20:02 |
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AFC EAST
New Angryland Bulltrots (2070)-2 New Warp Jets (2050)- 0 –
Stars - Teddy Bruiseci (NA) – 2 cas; Drew Bullsoe (NA) –TD; Devil McCourty (NA) –TD
Causalities: RIP: Alphonso Hodge (NW - 43 games-52 spp’s); MNG: Robby Felix (NW)
MonAmi Dauphins (2070) - 1 vs. Buffalo Billy Goats Gruff (2390) – 2
Stars: Brian Brohm (B) – INT, MVP; Steve Tisker Tasker (B) –TD; Mansfield Wrotto (B) –TD; Yeremiah Beltrain (M) – TD;
Causalities: MNG: Jareth Parthel (M); Jon Denney (M); Thurman Thomas (B)
Standings
1. Buffalo Billy Goats Gruff
2. New Angryland Bulltrots
3. New Warp Jets
4. MonAmi Dauphins
AFC NORTH
Cleveland Bashers (2020) - 1 vs. Baltimorus Ravenitis (2100) – 1
Stars: Soon to be Dead Player (C) – 3 CAS; Bernie Killer (C) –TD; Anquan Boldin (B) –TD
Causalities: RIP: Priest Holmes (B, 39 SPP’s); MNG: D'Qwell Jackhammer (C); Joe Flacco (B); Michael McCrary (B); Sam Adams
Cinderfall Bengals – 2 vs. Crushberg Bleeders – 1
Due to drunken journalists, the stats for this game were ignited and lost.
Standings
1. Cinderfall Bengals
2. Cleveland Bashers
3. Baltimorus Ravenitis
4. Crushberg Bleeders
AFC SOUTH
Pactsonville Pactuars (1760) – 2 vs. Tennessee Elf Titans (1980) – 2
Stars: Matt Tzurk (P) –TD; Aaron Warpman (P) –TD; Aidan Young (T) – 2 CAS; Anika Moon (T) – 2 TD
Causalities: SI: Kenny Britt (T); MNG: Karl Klug (T)
Houston Spoilers (2040) – 3 vs. Indiana-Police Colts (2030) – 1
Stars: Mike Rozier (H) –TD; Willard Dewveall (H) –TD; Billy "White Shoes" Johnson (H) – TD; Steve McNair (H) – 2 CP+CAS; Deputy van Halen (I) – TD
Causalities: SI: Enforcer Robinson (I);
Standings
1. Houston Spoilers
2. Pactsonville Pactuars
3. Tennessee Elf Titans
4. Indiana-Police Colts
AFC WEST
Oakland Elf Raiders (2250) – 1 vs. San Dogo Chompers (1710) – 0
Stars: Rolando McPain II (P) –CAS+TD; Ronweiler Mix (SD) –TD;
Causalities: SI: Paul Lowchen (SD); MNG: Louis Murphy III (O)
Rage City Chiefs (2120) – 2 vs. Denver Beard Co (2120) – 0
Stars: Matt Cassel (RC) –TD; Tony Moeaki (RC) –TD;
Causalities: RIP: John Lynch III (D, 0 SPP’s); Steve “Ax” watter (D, 81 SPP’s); MNG: Rod Grizzledman II (D)
Standings
1. Rage City Chiefs
2. Oakland Elf Raiders
3. San Dogo Chompers
4. Denver Beard Co
AFC PLAYER OF THE WEEK: Soon to be Dead Player (Cleveland) Casualty Hat-Trick!
NFC EAST
Dallas POM Boys (1950) – 1 vs. Washington Fast Kings (2000) – 1
Stars: Sammy Baugh (W) –TD; Tony "Jocko Homo" Romo (D) –TD;
Causalities: SI: Joe Washington (W); MNG: Brian Mitchell (W)
Philadelphia UnEagles (2000) – 1 vs. New Crypt Mummies (2210) – 0
Stars: Keith Burythem (P) –TD;
Causalities: SI: Harry Carson (NC); MNG: Odessa Turner (NC)
Standings
1. Philadelphia UnEagles
2. Dallas POM Boys
3. Washington Fast Kings
4. New Crypt Mummies
NFC NORTH
Minnesota ViQueens (2080) – 1 vs. Green Beard Hackers (2000) – 0
Stars: Tarveysha Jackson (M) –CP+INT+TD;
Causalities: RIP: Jarah Allen (M; 101 SPP’s) SI: Davina Dixon (M); MNG: Natalie Burleson (M)
Chi-Kaka Bores (2300) – 0 vs. DeTroit Lionz (2070) – 2
Stars: Sammie Kill (D) –TD; Brandon Pettigrew (D) - TD
Causalities: RIP: Brian Grrlacker (C; 77 SPP’s) MNG: Vance Briggs (C)
Standings
1. DeTroit Lionz
2. Minnesota ViQueens
3. Green Beard Hackers
4. Chi-Kaka Bores
NFC SOUTH
Skar Bays’ Buccaneers (1890) vs. Atlatl Falchions (2280) - Game delayed by beautiful weather
Stars:
Causalities:
New Arrleeaans Stiffs (1750) – 2 vs. Carolina NecromPanters (1980) – 0
Stars: Marques Colston (NA) –2 CAS+TD; Mark Ingram (NA) - TD
Causalities: MNG: Dexter Jackson II (C)
Standings
1. DeTroit Lionz
2. Minnesota ViQueens
3. Green Beard Hackers
4. Chi-Kaka Bores
NFC WEST
San Frenzysco 666ers (2030) – 3 vs. Seattle Sea Rats (2050) – 1
Stars: Patrick Willis (SF) –2 CAS+TD; Steve Young (SF) CP+2 TD’s; Michala Crabtree (SF) 2 CP’s+CAS; Stacy Andrews (S) 2 CAS’s; Anika Alexander (S) 2 CAS’s; Chris Warren (S) TD
Causalities: RIP: Merton Hanks (SF; 21 SPP’s); Terrelda Owen (SF; 15 SPP’s); Aaron Curry(S; 0 SPP); Curt Warner (S; 43 SPP’s) ; MNG: Stacy Andrews (S); Aidan Lynch (S)
Arizona Orcinals(2070) – 2 vs. Los Slanngeles Ranas (1580) – 2
Stars: Adrian Wilson (A) –3 CAS; Pago Togafau (A) TD; Larry Fitzgerald (A) TD; Steven Jumpson (LA) CP+TD; Norm Van Bullfrog (LA) TD
Causalities: none
Standings
1. San Frenzysco 666ers
2. Arizona Orcinals
3. Los Slanngeles Ranas
4. Seattle Sea Rats
NFC PLAYERS OF THE WEEK: Adrian Wilson (Arizona) Casualty Hat-Trick!; Tarveysha Jackson (Minnesota) 3/5’s of a Larrson!; |
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ryanfitz
Joined: Mar 24, 2009
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| Posted:
Sep 30, 2011 - 20:07 |
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| licker wrote: | Well I failed to kill Braylon, but he acted like a total chicken and sat out the 2nd half, cowering on the bench like the elf puss he is.
Bull Bullichick was so incensed by Braylons act of cowardice he took out his frustration on the 2 loners the Dauphins conned into playing for them. Niggleing one and killing the other.
Ahh what could have been eh? If Braylon's belly wasn't yellow and his ass stuffed with chicken feathers. |
he wasn't hiding, he just came back from the locker room a few seconds late and the ref wouldn't let him on the pitch until the drive was over. |
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licker
Joined: Jul 10, 2009
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| Posted:
Oct 01, 2011 - 07:00 |
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A likely story...
Braylon was too busy pissing himself in the locker room to get out to the field on time.
We hunger for the rematch, we will see what Braylon is made of then. Unless he ducks us by faking an injury or death before we get to him |
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ryanfitz
Joined: Mar 24, 2009
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Oct 02, 2011 - 19:48 |
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eisen
Joined: Nov 24, 2005
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| Posted:
Oct 08, 2011 - 15:58 |
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Greetings sports fans. We hit a snag with one coach this week but the unstopable deathroller that is the NBFL will always keep moving foward! Deadline for week 3 games is 10/15 As there are only a few left to go there shouldn't be a problem getting these in right away. Skar Bay and Indy were delt forfit losses this week and will be given more draconian punishments should this continue to be an issue. |
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Krispy
Joined: Jul 20, 2009
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| Posted:
Oct 08, 2011 - 16:44 |
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NBFL Week 2 Wrap
AFC EAST
New Angryland Bulltrots (2000)-1 MonAmi Dauphins (1880)- 1
Stars - Drew Bullsoe (NA) –INT; Bull Bullichik (NA) –2 CAS
Causalities: RIP: Martin Goldsnake (M - Journeyman); SI: Martin Strongbone (M Journeyman)
MonAmi Coach RyanFitz: “The east is filling up with ruffians and hack jobs who aren't even good at what they do.
Unfortunately the ref wouldn’t let Braylon back on the pitch for the 2nd half when he came back from the locker room 3 seconds late. As expected New Angryland is a bunch of hooligans and chumps”
Buffalo Billy Goats Gruff (2290) - 1 vs. New Warp Jets (1780) – 2
Stars: Terrel Ownes (B) – TD + 2 CAS; Ellis Lankster (NW) –2 CAS; Rodrique Wright (B) –2 CAS;
Causalities: MNG: Shawne Merriman (B); Steve Weatherford (NW);
Buffalo Coach Jeffro: “...the Billy Goats find that they can all too easily cut the corner of their mouths by trying to lick out an empty 10 oz. can of 100% Grade 'A' Wup-Ass...”
Standings
1. Buffalo Billy Goats Gruff – 4 pts.
2. New Angryland Bulltrots – 4 pts.
3. New Warp Jets – 3 pts.
4. MonAmi Dauphins – 1 pts.
AFC NORTH
Baltimorus Ravenitis (1770) - 2 vs. Crushberg Bleeders (2010) – 0
Stars: Bloodletter Batch (C) – 2 CPS; Ray Lewis (B) –2 CAS; Tony Siragusa (B) –2 CAS
Causalities: None reported
Cinderfall Bengals (2210) – 2 vs. Cleveland Bashers (1930) – 1
Stars: nobody shone in this match
Causalities: RIP: Anthony Muñoz jr (C – 68 games, 18 SPP’s)
Standings
1. Cleveland Bashers – 4 pts.
2. Baltimorus Ravenitis – 4 pts.
3. Cinderfall Bengals – 3 pts.
4. Crushberg Bleeders – 0 pts.
AFC SOUTH
Indiana-Police Colts (1760) – 0 vs. Tennessee Elf Titans (1980) – 0
Tennessee wins by forfeit
Houston Spoilers (2220) – 3 vs. Pactstonville Pactuars (1770) – 3
Stars: Willard Dewveall (H) –2 TD; Steve McNair (H) –4 CPS; Blood for the Blood Garrard (P) – TD + CPS; Fred "The Whaler" Taylor (P) – 2 TD
Causalities: none reported
Houston Coach Krispy: “Our team played great today and we were very lucky to come away with a point. I made a stupid decision in the first half to try and stall on the goal line and the Pactuars made us pay. This lead to their 2-0 lead. Clawing back into the game was a challenge and when Pactsonville scored late, I thought we were finished. But our elves pulled it together and scored last second to salvage a point. Well played game on both sides. Poorly coached on mine.”
Standings
1. Houston Spoilers – 4 pts.
2. Tennessee Elf Titans – 4 pts.
3. Pactstonville Pactuars – 2 pts.
4. Indiana-Police Colts – 0 pts.
AFC WEST
Oakland Elf Raiders (2060) – 2 vs. Rage City Chiefs (2150) – 1
Stars: Michael Bush VI (O) –INT+TD; Tamba Hali (RC) –4 CAS;
Causalities: RIP: Rolando McPain II (O, 66 SPP’s); SI Richard Seymour Wins IV (O); MNGStefen Wisniewski II (O)
San Dogo Chompers (1740) – 0 vs. Denver Beard Co (1970) – 1
Stars: Terrible Davis (SD) –TD+CPS;
Causalities: SI: Bill Roaminattheknees; Russ Fasttree Barking-Tons (D); MNG: Ronweiler Mix (D)
Standings
1. Oakland Elf Raiders – 4 pts.
2. Rage City Chiefs – 4 pts.
3. San Dogo Chompers – 3 pts.
4. Denver Beard Co – 1 pts.
AFC PLAYER OF THE WEEK: Tamba Hali (Rage City) –Casualty Hat-Trick! And then some!
NFC EAST
Dallas POM Boys (1960) – 1 vs. New Crypt Mummies (2000) – 1
Stars: Osi Umenyiora (NC) –TD; Tyron "Agent" Smith (D) –2 CAS’s; Jason Witten (D) TD
Causalities: MNG: Marcus Spears (D)
Philadelphia UnEagles (2000) – 1 vs. Washington Fast Kings (1870) – 2
Stars: Steve Van Bashem (P) –TD; Art Monk (W) – 2 TD’s;
Causalities: none
Standings
1. Washington Fast Kings – 4 pts.
2. Philadelphia UnEagles – 3 pts.
3. Dallas POM Boys – 2 pts.
4. New Crypt Mummies - 1 pts.
NFC NORTH
Minnesota ViQueens (1800) – 3 vs. Chi-Kaka Bores (1790) – 0
Stars: Randie Moss (M) – 2 CAS; Adrienne Peterson (M) – 3 CAS; Jilly Kleinsasser (M) – 2 CAS
Causalities: RIP: Jay Cutmore (C; 54 SPP’s) SI: O'Bliss wilgun (C); Sylvester Hideouslightning (C)MNG: Stealen Playea (C)
Coach Jeffro of Minnesota: “slap!.. SLAP!... SLAP... SLAP!!!
The ViQueens designed a tramp stamp for the Chi-Kaka Bores after their playoff loss to them last season... it has now been tattooed on them. It says "Trampionship Biotch"
Green Beard Hackers (2020) – 2 vs. DeTroit Lionz (2080) – 1
Stars: Aaron Rodgers (GB) –2 CPS; Brandon Pettigrew (D) – TD + CPS
Causalities: MNG: DeAndre Levy (D)
Green Beard Coach Deviant Strategist: “The Beards came out to play, put the good boots on and managed to out-muscle the freaks from Detroit.
Even in the midst of rumors of a possible inquiry into the alleged 'orc-oids' usage from numerous Lionz, the Beards didn't read anything into it and made sure Boyd was rested for his interview with the Commish on Monday!”
Standings
1. Minnesota ViQueens – 6 pts.
2. DeTroit Lionz – 3 pts.
3. Green Beard Hackers – 3 pts.
4. Chi-Kaka Bores – 0 pts.
NFC SOUTH
Skar Bays’ Buccaneers (1890) vs. Carolina NecromPanters (2280)
Carolina NecromPanters wine by Forfeit
New Arrleeaans Stiffs (1760) – 2 vs. Atlatl Falchions (1870) – 0
Stars: Drew Brees (NA) – 2 TD;
Causalities: MNG: J'remy Kr'xbe'ry (A); K'hris O'ens (A); Roman Harper (NA)
Atlatl Coach RyanFitz: “After the blitz to start the game, Atlatl was unable to find their way in this one, taking from turn 4 in the 1st half until turn 3 in the 2nd and 3 burnt rerolls just to pick up the ball, unable to injure enough of the NO Stains, and ending up with just 3 bodies on the field to end the game.”
Standings
1. New Arrleeaans Stiffs – 6 pts.
2. Atlatl Falchions – 3 pts.
3. Carolina NecromPanters – 3 pts.
4. Skar Bays’ Buccaneers – 0 pts.
NFC WEST
San Frenzysco 666ers (2030) – 1 vs. Arizona Orcinals (2100) – 1
Stars: Alan Branch (A) –TD + CAS;
Causalities: SI: Nate Byham Jr (SF)
Seattle Sea Rats (1580) – 3 vs. Los Slanngeles Ranas (1770) – 2
Stars: Steve Largent (S) –2 TD’s; Eric Dickerslann (LS) 2 TD’s;
Causalities: MNG: James Leapinaitis (LS)
Standings
1. San Frenzysco 666ers – 4 pts.
2. Seattle Sea Rats – 3 pts.
3. Arizona Orcinals – 2 pts.
4. Los Slanngeles Ranas – 1 pts.
NFC PLAYERS OF THE WEEK: Adrienne Peterson (Minnesota ViQueens) – Casualty Hat-Trick! |
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eisen
Joined: Nov 24, 2005
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| Posted:
Oct 24, 2011 - 16:27 |
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Week 5 (round2) kicks off today. Everyone got their games in except for one coach. And in unrelated news that coach is no longer with us Deadline is 10/31 |
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eisen
Joined: Nov 24, 2005
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| Posted:
Nov 01, 2011 - 15:34 |
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Week 6 starts today and the deadline is set for 11/8 Start scheduling your games now.
Week 6 was horiffic. 4 missed games and only in 2 of thoes did I see any effort to actually get the games played. Warnings are issued to Zoebugs, MrNomad, Deviant_Strategist, and Krispy. Schedule your games now people or we're going to start cleaning house in Week 7 |
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