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ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jan 03, 2024 - 21:36
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SWL XCVIII Premier
Round 4: The_Demon's Chaos Renegades "We Come From A Land Up Over"Image

A rematch against the winner of my conference last season. I was still a little bitter about their great escape last time we met.

After being brutalized by Chaos, the Luckers came into this match with a journeyman. Bomber Dribblesnot gave us a rather shaky bench. A bench that would be needed as that journeyman was hurt with the second block of the game. Dribblesnot decided to open some gaps by knocking over two BOrcs with his first ill directed bomb, and the pressure came on.

Again we had this freaky lass to deal with:
Image

Last time she made the mistake of standing next to the sideline for an uphill surf. She wouldn't make that mistake again. Go Bomber with a 5+ throw

KABOOOOM!
Image

After that things got really violent. I could have scored a second TD on T14 with only 2 Renegades on the pitch. Rewatching this game I can't fathom why I stalled it out. I guess I had my blood goggles on.

Pitch clear!
Image

All that carnage and only 2 casualties? My dirty git really is a star. Gracefield accounted for 7 of those players cleared from the pitch. Agent fees are getting very high for the little goblin, well worth every penny.

Full Time: 2 - 0 (1/1/0 - 2/0/1)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jan 05, 2024 - 20:23
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SWL XCVIII Premier
Round 5: SkittleMosaic's Chaos Dwarf "Minutes or Centuries"Image

Round 2 had its blodge pro hypno freaks, Round 3 random freaks, Round 4 had a strong blodging mutant freak, what would Round 5 throw at us?
Image Image
Wow! What a combo! Strength Bull and Agility Bull. How to combat those two?

Not well as it turned out
Image
Giving Strength Bull just one (5+) dodge into the cage was poor, an unlucky bounce then Agility Bull swept in with a pickup (5+) and was away.

Agility Bull also has speed. Out of range of my BOrc hitters. However, goblins have been my blitzers on many occasions - they wouldn't let me down.
Image

OK, but it's not over yet. Just how agile is Agility Bull?
Image

Too Agile

Half time 0-1

This was bad, but I did have a numbers advantage. I felt pretty proud of myself for this play:
Image

With Agility Bull out of the picture it should have been pretty easy to even things up. SkittleMosaic and Strength Bull certainly did not make it easy. GGs did a tricky/desperate little goblin punt into space from deep in our own half, tied up the chorfs and were away.

Reasonably happy with the draw, but I need to work on protecting the ball carrier better - I can't just rely on removing the opposition. A tight cage wasn't the right play against Strength Bull.

Full Time: 1 - 1 (0/3/0 - 0/0/1)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jan 06, 2024 - 21:39
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SWL XCVIII Premier
Round 6: Irgy's Undead "Nana's Undiess"Image

Another Prem game another stat freak
Image

It's kind of nice to see that previous Prem winners can get things wrong too.
Irgy: oh christ it's ramchop and black orcs I'm missing the mummy for... though at least it means I'll be the underdog so no bomber

KABOOM!
Image

Dirty git Gracefield had a pretty quiet game on the fouling front. Only four fouls, and no removals. But that stun on Ball Bagger was fairly important. The ghoul not wanting further tapdancing dodged away (3+) and promptly hurt himself.

And we're away.......
Image

Or not. Snakes. Gracefield to save the day with his hands instead of his feet.

Image

Half time 1-0

And we're away.... or not....
Image

These prem coaches sure know how to put on the pressure.

Full Time: 2 - 1 (0/1/1 - 1/0/0)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jan 08, 2024 - 20:43
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SWL XCVIII Premier
Round 7: Kransky's Ogre "Ugg’s Eleven"Image

Final game of the season. Dreams of Prem glory long gone. Chance of getting top 3 and staying up also extinguished. But there's always something to play for. The best a BOrc team has ever done in SWL is 5th in Prem. The GGs had already matched ClayInfinity's benchmark this season, but a win here meant we'd do one better and shift the Black Orcs up two places on SWL's forlorn list.

Captain Ugg. We've met him before. Today he survived two gang fouls by Gracefield (both stuns), then on the 3rd... my dirty git rolled nipples on injury.
Image

Tirohanga. My hero. Today he survived two gang fouls by a sneaky git.
Image

then deep into the second half...
Image

Sploosh! The GGs star was never going to get rehired next season. Agents fees had crept up to 60k, and his young understudy had just secured his second MA+. RIP Tirohanga.

Full Time: 0 - 2 (0/2/0 - 2/0/1)

7 match reports in little over a week. It was interesting revisiting the games after up to 2 months. I'm not one for watching sports replays, especially when I know the result. However, I'd forgotten a lot of what went on in these games and found it fascinating to relive them only vaguely remembering what happened. I think this season's match reports probably lacked a bit of the emotional charge I feel when writing them straight after the event, and I'll try to keep up with the pace in season 99.
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jan 19, 2024 - 19:38
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference

Back down to the 2nd tier. Pretty good variety here:

Image Bloodwolf Bandits (1440k, 6/3/9 = 42% win rate) Bobs
Image Ahuriri Unearthly (1460k, 6/5/1 = 71% win rate) Sandune
Image Killer Heelz (1390k, 24/20/31 = 45% win rate) Reggiesson
Image Pitch Painters (965k, 28/19/22 = 54% win rate) Faulcon
Image Bronzed Raiders (1390k, 22/6/11 = 64% win rate) Sharper
Image Perfectionists Of Excess (1410k, 9/6/13 = 43% win rate) Foffa
Image Kiwi Mountain Kings (1440k, 4/6/15 = 28% win rate) Miyuso
Image Clar Garond Buzwalis (1600k, 7/6/4 = 59% win rate) ClayInfinity
Image Malapropisms Relieved (1360k, 17/9/9 = 61% win rate) BeefyGoodness

Until you realise that it's a 10 team conference and I skip the first two races. I don't like 10 team pools, not everyone plays each other so it doesn't feel like an even playing field. But I get it. As commish of another league I'm struggling with what to do with 17 entrants to the new season.

Since when has blood bowl had an even playing field anyway?
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Feb 02, 2024 - 20:34
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 1: Reggiesson's Dark Elf "Killer Heelz"Image

Agent fees! They really do bite. The GGs had a budget of 1480k. You get 50k less in 2nd tier of conferences than you do in Prem. We didn't get the wins last season, and treasury was a meagre (but safe from EM) 180k.

So what does a Black Orc team need?
A scorer. Tirohanga MA8, Block, sure feet, sprint met his end in the final game of the season. However, had he lived he would have attracted 60k in agent fees. We are very fortunate to have a young talented replacement in the wings. Belmont MA8, Block and only 18 games - fees free!

A fouler. Gracefield. Dirty git and Golden Boot winner of Prem'98. Black Orcs need to cause the pain and a solid fouler is a necessity. Sadly, Gracefield has no understudy. No dirty player, not even a sneaky git. This situation needs to be rectified. 75k in agent fees is a hell of a lot extra to carry on such a player. 90k next time around may be too much.

A hitter. Mighty Blow, Block, Tackle. We have two of these. Onslow the captain at 60k agent fees was all set for retirement, but he was the only one with Guard. 6xS4 is nice, but we need guard! And I couldn't sack understudy Kelburn, he's young, fit and fees free.

So again, we enter a season with no bench. 135k spent on agent fees for two players.

There is a plus side to coming in cheap though. 50k cheaper than the opposition...

Image

The Heelz had hoped, not unreasonably, to score quickly and see the back of Bomber Dribblesnot. Three Blitzers knocked out on the first turn. Killer!

Bomber didn't need to throw any bombs after that.

Half time 1-0

And then to rub salt in the wounds the referee let him back on in the second half. We didn't need him, we could have left him on the bench... but then we got greedy.

Image

Very, very lucky. Bomber didn't throw any bombs after that.

Full Time: 2 - 0 (1/1/0 - 1/0/0)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Feb 03, 2024 - 20:57
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 2: Faulcon's Snotling "Pitch Painters"Image

I had a bit of a dilemma going into this one. When you play Black Orcs in League you tend to use Bomber Dribblesnot a fair bit. You also hear a lot of hatred from other coaches directed at the little guy. He can be a game changer, or he can blow himself up on T1. So, with 90k in the bank, do I spend 50k to cancel Bomber, or do I buy two goblins?

In the end I figured snotlings is a numbers game. They'd overwhelm me if I only brought 11 players to the party, so I went with a bench. Faulcon went with Riotous Rookies, 2 Bribes, Hakflem Skuttlespike and of course, Bomber Dribblesnot.

First Half snots receive.

Bombers bombs were mostly ill directed, but certainly not disastrously for the snotlings. The GGs hitter found himself on the ground getting booted relentlessly by SWL's biggest (and littlest) fouler. Eventually Onslow got KOed and Electric Indigo got sent off. Meanwhile, GGs hitter understudy had a field day, scoring three casualties on snotlings and knocking out a troll.

However, as is so often the case, it's not the strength of the BOrcs but the speed of the goblins that's needed to blitz the ball carrier.

Turn 5:
Image
Oh well.

Turn 7
Image
Oh well, thanks Nuffle. A swift boot to the head then saw the end of Hakflem's involvement in the match.

Half Time 0 - 0

This should have been easy. The Painters were down a troll and two stars, and only had 12 on the pitch. My speedy carrier just needed to sit back and watch the snotlings evaporate.

While I appreciated the power of the goblin blitz on S3, somehow I underestimated the power of the snotling blitz on S2. My ball carrier didn't sit back far enough.

Turn 10
Image

This put me on the back foot a little. My race into the Painters half was a bit more desperate than it needed to be, and the goblins left the slow BOrcs behind.

At this stage of the game the snotlings weren't everywhere, but they could still get anywhere.

Turn 14
Image

Full Time 1 - 0 (4/1/1 - 2/0/0)

This was the GGs 5th attempt at beating snotlings. Feels good to finally get that win, even if it leaned quite heavily on Nuffle's love.
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Feb 16, 2024 - 22:00
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 3: Sharpers's Chaos Dwarf "Bronzed Raiders"Image

Meanwhile in DIBBL:
<ramchop> 5/5 failed ko rolls i think
<ramchop> hopefully Nuffle is saving his love for my swl game tomorrow


Funny how the mind works. My FUMBBL play is pretty much restricted to two leagues at the moment. The Deserted Isles Blood Bowl Leeg (DIBBL) - the NZ based league that I run; and SWL. I'd played two games so far in each season. Lost both my DIBBL games, won both of my SWL. A nice symmetry.

So, I was half expecting some kindness from Nuffle for my SWL Round 3. I know that probability doesn't work like that. I know that Nuffle doesn't work like that. But the thought was still there.

It didn't last long.

Image

A dead BOrc and a -St BOrc. I'm glad I didn't scum Bomber (he'd have been cancelled anyway) - I'll need the cash for some midseason recruits.

Full Time 0 - 4 (1/0/0 - 2/3/0)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Mar 02, 2024 - 01:34
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 4: Foffa's Chaos Chosen "Perfectionists Of Excess"Image

Blitz!
A lovely way to start a match. We got bodies around the ball and hoped for the best.

Some people really don't like Bomber Dribblesnot .
Image


Despite the casualty, Bomber drawing players away from the action followed by a Cas and a KO of our own, meant the GGs secured the ball and ran off for a TD.

Bomber only lasted the 3 turns before the TD, didn't even chuck a bomb, but soaked up plenty of blocks. Well worth the 50k.

Half Time 2-0

Two nil up and receiving.

If this game had happened after I wrote up Round 3, it is highly likely that my previous post would have featured a massive whinge about how my horrific injury toll came off the back of me outblocking the Chorfs.

But I couldn't complain after Foffa outblocked me 2:1, yet we still saw a steady procession of Chaos into casualty and the KO bin.

Full Time 3 - 0 (1/1/0 - 1/0/0)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Mar 08, 2024 - 21:54
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 5: Miyuso's Chaos Dwarf "Kiwi Mountain Kings"Image

Not everyone in SWL lives in Australia or NZ. Some are expats living in far off lands, some just need more blood bowl, and others realise we just have a mighty fine league down under. SWL does it better.

Miyuso falls into the first camp, ex-pat Aussie living in some snow covered state of America. Timezones can be a problem, some foreigners struggle to schedule to the Aussie clock and expect us look at something called "server time". But Miyuso is not one of those. Unfortunately for him I had a tabletop tournament on, so his preferred weekend slot was taken. Yet without complaint, he got up at 1am his time to play this midweek game.

The speed with which these Chorfs played their first turn had me thinking their coach was eager to get back to bed. It flew by quicker than replay pace.

Turn 2, the Mountain Kings hand off to a freaky minotaur. The GGs couldn't hit him, but we could get up close and personal.

Image

Chorfs Turn 3: Image rr Image

Goodnight Chorfs

Full Time 3 - 0 (2/1/0 - 0/1/0)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Mar 09, 2024 - 21:54
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 6: ClayInfinity's Dark Elf "Clar Garond Buzwalis"Image

Elves give me the sh!ts. They shouldn't. The GGs don't have a losing record against any variety of elf. Game plan destroy them seemed to be working really well against this lot (3 in casualty by turn 3). So why do elves give me the sh!ts?

6+ jump...
Image

They score on turn 5 giving the GGs 3 turns to equalise. BOrcs might be slow but I've got my Ma8 speedster...
Image
Snakes

Half time 0-1

The second half kicked off with only 4 elves on the pitch. We mowed down the ball carrier deep in our own half on Turn 9. No rushes to score meant the equaliser came on turn 13.

I might have considered stalling it out. GGs were sitting pretty at the top of the table but there was no guarantee of promotion. 3 to 4 teams are going up from this conference this season. Bogey team Khemri next round. I felt we needed the win.
Image

Elves only need 3 players to score right? Elves give me the sh!ts. But now was not the time to be chickensh!t.

Turn 16
Image

Full time 2 - 1 (1/1/0 - 1/0/0)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Mar 28, 2024 - 22:41
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SWL XCIX Filleted Conference
Round 7: BeefyGoodness's Tomb Kings "Malapropisms Relieved"Image

None of the first 6 turns of this game started with ball in hand.
Turn 1 Khemri: Image Image rr Image Image before the first pickup attempt
Turn 1 BOrc: GGs surround the ball
Turn 2 Khemri: Malapropisms surround the ball
Turn 2 BOrc: Surehands goblin 5+ pickup, dodge, dodge sideline cage. Easy. Fireball.
Turn 3 Khemri: Malapropisms surround the ball
Turn 3 BOrc:

Image

I really wanted this win. Already guaranteed promotion, but that Shiny Silver Conference Cup is something special. Nuffle was providing - the Khemri rolled five Image Image this game. Five!

But I struggle with the strength of the Tomb Kings. They equalised at half time. My blodger snaked a gfi in a desperate flee towards the line.

Full Time: 1 - 1 (1/1/0 - 2/0/0)

There was still hope for the shiny silver cup. All I needed was for Sandune to not win his final game of the season. Sandune.

GGs get 2nd.
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Mar 30, 2024 - 20:33
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SWL C Premier

Season 100! And I get to play it in Prem. Woot!
This SWL thing has been going since 2003. I started in 58, closest I've come to the big prize is 3rd. That golden trophy looks forever out of reach, especially with this team, but the dream is there. Got to be in to win.

Agent fees cut deep. Even with a decent 1630k budget there was a difficult decision to make.

Gracefield: Dirty git. Agent fees 90k
I haven't done a full count, but the feeling is that this little bugger has removed more players from the pitch than anyone else.

Onslow: Block, MB, Tackle, Guard. Agent fees 75k
He has an understudy with the same skill set only attracting 15k. But Prem is tough, why not bring both tough guys?

There were other options. Purge the young faces with single skills. Drop a reroll. Drop a troll. Drop the bench.

But there was this nagging feeling that Gracefield's time had come. He'd die first game. I needed a solid tough core at the front. So I dropped the gold and silver boot winner. The team just got a little less fun, but Prem isn't about fun - it's a serious business.

And what does Prem look like this season?:

Image Ahuriri Unearthly (1490k, 11/7/1 = 76% win rate) Sandune
Image Minutes or Centuries (1470k, 41/20/22 = 61% win rate) SkittleMosaic
Image [SWL] Dorruks (1480k, 28/25/26 = 51% win rate) npe
Image Turbo Wolves (1550k, 38/17/21 = 61% win rate) JamesDSF
Image Believe in Swarming (1185k, 15/2/6 = 70% win rate) CokeGuy
Image Malapropisms Relieved (1390k, 20/13/9 = 63% win rate) BeefyGoodness
Image Pitch Painters (1065k, 32/21/23 = 56% win rate) Faulcon

and the GGs?

Image GG Luckers (1495k, 28/19/22 = 60% win rate) ramchop
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Apr 07, 2024 - 02:01
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SWL C Premier
Round 1: Sandune's Necromantic "Ahuriri Unearthly"Image

I had a small gripe at the start of last season about 10 team confs meaning not everyone played each other. Secretly though I wasn't too disappointed about missing playing Sandune. Until that is, he snuck up behind me and took the Shiny Silver Cup from my grasp. So Round 1 in Prem was a chance for it to be confirmed that I didn't deserve it.

In the tabletop world 2024 is my year of Necromantic. They are the race with my worst NAF ranking. I took them to Melbourne last year in an attempt to improve this, and went a woeful 0/4/2. I'm now within spitting distance of being the lowest ranked Necro coach in NZ, and so I've vowed to keep playing them all year until I either turn around the losing record, or cement my position as the worst in the country - full Masochismo.

So although I've experienced how tough Necro can be, I wasn't expecting a win in this match. The Unearthly had sprung straight up to Prem as quick as is possible with an 11/7/1 record.

First Half the GGs receive, and all bar 1 goblin were blocked into casualty by Reagan Cherem, a mean wraith with mighty blow and tackle. I was really happy that I had opted for a bench over agent fees.

In response the GGs pummeled the soft heads of the necro positionals, knocking out 5 of them. Three came back for T8, but the two remaining in the bin (including Reagan) were still sleeping after the half time break.

Half Time 1 - 0

Going into Turn 3 of the second half both coaches had two rerolls left.
Image

Wolf gfi [1] rr [4]
Ghoul 1st gfi [1] rr [4]
Ghoul 2nd gfi [1]
Turnover

BOrc Block Image Image rr Image Image
Goblin gfi [1] rr [2]
BOrc Block Image Image Brawler Image
No Turnover

Full Time: 2 - 0 (1/1/0 - 1/1/1)
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Apr 12, 2024 - 22:04
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SWL C Premier
Round 2: SkittleMosaic's Chaos Dwarf "Minutes or Centuries"Image

Last time I met these guys they had a horrendous S5 Bull, and a horrific Ag3 Bull. This time, the Ag Bull is mng. Hooray! Higher TV meant I was going to be facing an inducement or two, but I enjoyed the bench so much last game that I went shopping to replace the dead goblin and the mng goblin. No money left to cancel Dribblesnot, we'd be fine, he'll blow himself up.

However...
Image

I have a love hate relationship with Skitter Stab-Stab. Mostly hate.

First Drive
Despite a fantastic first turn (2 chorf removals), I really felt all at sea on this drive. The S5 break tackle chorf / Skitter combo with a dash of Dribblesnot meant I never felt safe anywhere on the pitch. I think I played it really badly, but Nuffle smiled at me at some key moments and the Luckers lucked the score

Half Time 1-0

Second Drive
Skitter raced up the sideline. A couple of dodges for a support goblin, then a blitz by my block speedster would give me an easy 2D hit on the bugger. Easy. First dodge fail.

Third Drive
Time for the Skitter show. Huge error bringing forward the ball. Why can't I count?

Image

Terrible pickup, horrible bounces

Image

Skitter fails!

Image

Skitter gone!

Image

"Safe"

Image

That really was a kick in the guts. I could have played that better. Place the defence before I blitzed Skitter. Then I'd have felt safer stepping onto the ball. I should have stepped onto the ball. Just too keen to get Skitter

Full Time: 1 - 2 (2/0/0 - 0/1/0)

I'm out of my depth. I don't belong here. Let the self pity of another failed Prem season commence.
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