Grum's Grudging Grumbles
The Grotty Little Newspaper's intrepid reporter Goallie11 went out into the wilds of the FUMBBL badlands to collect questions to ask everyone's least favourite admin: Grumbledook. Uncle Grum is known far and wide to be an expert on any and all topics you could ever think of, and many more you couldn't. His favourite topic is his own glorious magnificence... and who could argue with him on that? But we shall now allow Goallie11 to respectfully set up the questions so that Uncle Grum can knock them over...
This one is from Homer-Simpson:
"What's your favorite BB team and why?"
Any that are coached by me. Why? Because they are better than the others.
One from Borderline:
"Dear Grum, what has been your happiest moment as a FUMBBL admin so far?"
Generally, the happiest times are when no one comes in to bother me. Or if someone actually wants help, they reply to the questions you ask rather than wittering on with useless stuff you don't need to know. The guys who don't argue about things either are cool, nothing worse than the whining types we get in who seem to think that it's wrong for us to punish them for breaking the rules.
"How much beer do you drink?"
In money amounts or in liquid amounts? This question is as bad as those who come into the admin room, ignore the topic saying state your problem and just sit there shouting, "I have a problem" "hello!?! Anyone there?!" Can't respond very well to vague questioning, unless you want a vague answer. Much like this one.
Slick wants to know:
"Why are Nurgling the best Stunty team?"
Because they are the first team that I will delete on my way to deleting the whole Stunty Leeg division should I get a chance.
"How come when you take a bite out of an apple and leave it out, it turns brown?"
When I bite an apple, it doesn't. However, I shall be nice and inform you that when you do it, apples turn brown when iron-containing chemicals inside apple cells react with oxygen in the air.
If you want to offer up questions to be answered by Uncle Grum in the next issues of the GLN, send them via a PM to m0nty.