I am the Gutter Runner – the luckiest fluke to ever grace the Blood Bowl field, affectionately known as the "Joey Chestnut" of this crazy sport! It's a miracle they even let me near the pitch with my complete lack of skill, but hey, I'm living proof that luck is all you need! You won't find any fancy strategies here, folks; I just close my eyes, cross my fingers, and pray that the ball goes where it's supposed to (or not). Off the field, I'm like a bull in a mini-golf course, turning precision into a chaotic spectacle! And let's not talk about bowling; my technique is so unique that it's patented under "Crazy Kieren Style." Oh, did I mention the Love-Letter Nationals? I may be the perennial runner-up, but my almost-victories keep the romance alive! If you're ready for a hilarious adventure with Lady Luck's misfit sidekick, hop on board the Kieren Express – it's gonna be one heck of a hilariously bumpy ride!