35 coaches online • Server time: 08:01
* * * Did you know? There are 367996 active teams in FUMBBL.
Log in
Recent Forum Topics goto Post GLN 2020 Badgesgoto Post NBFL Season 24: Wint...goto Post Secret League Old Wo...
JackassRampant
Last seen 3 hours ago
Human
Legend
Human
Record
281/131/119
Win Percentage
65%
Orc
Super Star
Orc
Record
109/45/60
Win Percentage
61%
Overall
[R]
Super Star
Overall
Record
731/275/314
Win Percentage
66%
Archive

2020

2020-09-15 16:46:13
rating 4.5
2020-09-11 04:42:53
rating 5.5
2020-08-17 18:43:44
rating 4.1
2020-08-17 18:37:25
rating 4.6
2020-08-17 18:08:41
rating 4.3
2020-08-17 17:54:03
rating 4
2020-02-26 04:54:58
rating 4.6
2020-02-25 17:53:07
rating 4.4
2020-02-22 18:18:59
rating 4.8
2020-02-22 17:32:27
rating 5
2020-02-19 18:01:17
rating 5.8
2020-02-18 21:21:00
rating 5.9

2019

2019-12-29 14:51:03
rating 5.2
2019-12-08 03:14:34
rating 5.9
2019-10-23 18:17:17
rating 5.3
2019-09-30 19:39:21
rating 5.7
2019-02-28 16:21:11
rating 5.8
2019-02-16 05:05:46
rating 1.8
2019-02-12 20:33:16
rating 1.7
2019-02-07 08:57:24
rating 1.3
2019-02-06 17:07:28
rating 2.6
2019-01-05 20:10:51
rating 5.6

2018

2017

2017-12-13 15:36:46
rating 5
2017-10-15 02:50:34
rating 4.3
2017-09-30 21:52:56
rating 5
2017-09-10 23:00:16
rating 4.9
2017-08-30 19:29:39
rating 6
2017-06-25 21:10:09
rating 5.4
2017-02-14 20:41:13
rating 4.6
2017-02-09 04:15:51
rating 4.3
2017-02-01 16:35:03
rating 3.5
2017-01-09 06:48:33
rating 5.8
2017-01-03 22:26:31
rating 2.8

2016

2016-10-26 16:39:39
rating 5.9
2016-10-06 01:38:35
rating 5.5
2016-07-02 01:18:38
rating 4.3
2016-06-28 18:54:58
rating 3.5
2016-01-28 08:12:39
rating 4.6
2016-01-27 18:15:53
rating 6

2015

2015-08-22 17:42:52
rating 2.4
2015-01-26 16:45:18
rating 5

2014

2014-10-01 03:51:24
rating 4.4
2014-03-14 17:58:34
rating 5
2014-03-12 19:49:16
rating 4.2
2014-02-27 02:15:42
rating 4.3

2013

2013-10-24 16:16:38
rating 4.5
2013-10-16 05:15:52
rating 4.9
2013-10-14 23:39:13
rating 4.8
2013-10-10 00:50:25
rating 4.1
2013-09-24 01:51:44
rating 4.2
2013-09-13 21:36:27
rating 4.2
2013-09-12 20:11:38
rating 5.9
2013-05-16 21:39:45
rating 2.1
2013-03-02 19:45:11
rating 3.9
2013-02-10 21:10:12
rating 4
2013-01-18 06:45:04
rating 4.2

2012

2012-10-30 21:01:49
rating 2.3
2012-10-18 17:10:07
rating 1.6
2012-08-26 17:16:17
rating 2.3
2012-01-09 00:47:16
rating 2.8

2011

2011-12-09 19:37:22
rating 3.3
2011-11-09 17:54:17
rating 4
2011-11-05 20:10:25
rating 4.8
2011-11-04 20:59:28
rating 3.9
2011-11-04 16:39:57
rating 4.6
2011-11-03 05:19:08
rating 2.2
2011-09-21 09:08:03
rating 3.2
2011-08-14 14:51:08
rating 3.8
2011-11-05 20:10:25
15 votes, rating 4.8
Injured Ref Puts Crimp in Face Plans
World's Edge — A freak injury in the recent FUMBBL Cup match between the Angry Newscasters and Azure Claw Squad may have implications throughout the tournament.

At the very beginning of the match, the line ref, Horgan Dorganborg, fractured his tibia when caught in a scrum between Newscaster heavyweight Giampiero Galeazzi XVIII and Isabel Gentlewind, a blocker for the Claw Squad. Dorganborg was set to oversee tomorrow's match between Right in da Face and Not Another
Elf Team, but now it is clear he will be unable to make the journey to the Eastern Black Mountains. Dorganborg's agent, Fleischgand Hardenfaster, had been in contact with Face coach JackassRampant, which had led some to speculate Dorganborg may have been in for some of the Face's anticipated 350,000 gold in inducement cash.

When asked if this development would impact any contract negotiations between the team and famed topiarist Urgoth Bolgrot, Bolgrot's attorney, Yarmorg Rugmargkh, said that he was unaware of any such discussion having occurred.

This leaves the Face inducement options for the coming match somewhat up in the air. Some have speculated that Ripper the troll, or the mighty Varag Ghoul-Chewer, may be on the menu. Ghoul-Chewer has in the past expressed disdain for Morkite Orcs, and either player would be a disappointment for the wizard Elfmincer, who has already been seen on-site, but who could not be hired within the team's budget.

When asked about these developments, Elfmincer remained upbeat. "It's a long tournament," he said. "I'm sure I'll find some work for a marquee game in the next round or two. Besides, who knows? It's not like the new ref can't be bought. Perhaps they'll hire an Apothecary, or that Goblin with the stick."

Head coaches JackassRampant and Spubbbba could not be reached for contact, but players from both sides seem unconcerned with the final inducement selection. Said Face player Ten of Cups, "Meez alwayz wunted ta play next ta a star. and meez glad ta fynully git a chanz. Rippa, Urgoth, Varag, wutevva: just gimme a ottograff!" NA[F]ET signal-caller OMGWTFBBQ United had this to say: "I've heard of all those guys. I've seen scary players over the centuries, and I'm not too concerned. Then again, I don't play on the line...."

The match will be held Sunday at 19:30 GMT.
Rate this entry
Comments
Posted by Cavetroll on 2011-11-05 21:43:26
I enjoy these. Keep 'em coming. And my vote is for Varag Ghoul-Chewer. He'd fit in nicely with your bunch.
Posted by JackassRampant on 2011-11-06 00:01:47
I was debating between him and Ripper, primarily.

I'm suspicious of saws, and I don't foul enough to get good mileage out of a Bribe if the saw goes KO. But the Wizard might be good, in case those slippery elveses squirt away from me, and the Saw/Bribe sounds better than any other 200k.

Ripper vs. Varag, OTOH, there's a debate. Either one is my left defensive end. Varag lets the elves 2d, while Ripper will probably force an elfy 323 line. Grab would also be nice. But the reliability of Varag's Jump Up and Block would sure be nice.
Posted by DatMonsta on 2011-11-06 09:15:10
Amazing Fluff, really enjoyed reading it!

There can only be one answer to the inducement question:

Bring a Wizz, the Chainsaw and a Bribe!
There is nothing better against Elves than a Saw (just use it in offense, is my opinion), and when it gets bashed out (the elves will surely hunt it) you still can can put the boot in every downed elf (and be kind of safe with it)!