“The season 16 National Championship Game was a rematch of the week one pairing of two of the NCBBs most slutdrunk programs.

In the Ohio State Drunkguys you have a team dedicated to the proposition that all kegs should be tapped, and all guys should be sucking on them.

In the Arizona Girls Gone Wildcats you have a team dedicated to the loving handling of poles and wet T-shirt contests.

Who could ask for anything more? Well apparently a lot of people could as the spectators who showed up for the game were both quite and boring and probably 18 kinds of retarded with a dollop of incontinence thrown in for good measure.

None the less, the drunk lads and slutty lasses lined up to play the game they all love to play, when they're not drinking, or trying to feel up anything with a pulse. Hell most of the time that's how they play the game anyway.

Arizona won the coin toss as a drunkguy tried to steal the coin from the ref to play a game of skeeball, and after a couple rowdy songs and 'artful gesticulations' the teams lined up. The girls threw a few blocks, mostly just pushing the guys around, but Cayman managed to take down Luke Roberts, though OSU chose to have their doc blow his load of pharma to get Luke ready to come back in at the next stoppage.

There were a few more turns of pushing for position with neither side really accomplishing much, but eventually the girls committed to an attack along the bottom of the pitch. The position looked decent enough, when the drunkguys were able to take out 2 girl from the screen and force Ademola and Michelle to back track a bit. Things were looking up for the guys at that point, but the next turn saw the girls hit back, KOing a couple guys and establishing a break through towards the goal line. It was tenuous though, and the guys freed up Craig for a nice 2d hit on Ady, no tackle vs her blodge, but strip ball forced her to try a dump off into double coverage on Michelle. Fortunately for the girls the pass got out cleanly, and Michelle was able to snatch the ball.

The ensuing position, however, was still quite precarious for the girls, so they set up a freeing blitz for Michelle to take the ball in with a couple gfis on turn 7. That left 2 turns for the drunkguys to try the eqalizer, they also had a slight man advantage of 11-10 at that point.

The crowd, being a boring group of utter mongoloids decided to riot, and the ref simply let the clock run ahead, negating any chance for the drunkguys to equalize at the half. Instead they took out their frustration by sending 3 girls off the pitch. However, the girls had brought a stock of wine coolers and were able to field 10 again at the start of the 2nd half.

The 2nd half kick off saw the guys try their macho tricks again, but the girls must have been ready, none of them left the pitch on the guys first drive, and the girls were once again able to send off a few guys to the KO box. The guys were quite annoyed to discover that coach Jeffro had traded in the beer he had promised them for a lucky rabbits foot, but that's coach J for you I guess.

The drunk guys examined their position on turn 11 and decided that a TD was possible with just a little bit of effort, and as the girls had actually taken the player advantage away from them they went for it. A missed gfi was rerolled into success and the 2nd gfi saw the guys equalize the game, leaving the girls with 6 turns to do what they could though.

The ensuing kick off saw the girls once again fail to land any good hits on the drunk guys line, but the ball was secured deep in the backfield, and the girls had a solid screen up at the LOS to keep the guys from making much trouble. Indeed the guys failed once again on their attack, but the next turn saw the girls, and Cayman start to knock off guys left and right. The next 6 turns were a simple affair of the girls out manning the guys, knocking their rocks off (literally in the cases of Tommy and Eddie) and walking in a turn 16 score.

What a game folks, too bad none of the spectators were able to enjoy it, what with them being silent douchebags and all :)

More seriously...

Jeffro had the better team in my estimation, but his dice simply refused to cooperate. His fouls did nothing but get his players sent off. His dodges all seemed to fail (though Kylan was around with her diving tackle for a couple of them), and his CAS dice didn't do enough. Meanwhile my dice didn't cause me any particular issues, at least nothing that a rr didn't fix. Still I think the game was well played on both sides, and it didn't really get out of hand until after Jeffro made it 1-1, from that point on the Girls dice were simply too much, and the Drunkguys couldn't catch a break.”