“No idea how to play against <insert name of enemy team type here>, blah blah blah, secret weapons did nothing, blah blah blah, ball carrier thrown into the crowd, blah blah blah, useless little green ****ers, blah blah blah, at least nobody died, blah blah blah, 0-2 score actually very flattering to the Breakers, blah blah blah, business as usual, blah blah.”