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Scribbl 05a: Dreamscape Completed
Issue 15604, Winter 3103, Round x
The Story
Previously in Scribbl...
Grot returned from his vacation to find that the magazine had been sold to F Phoenix, the meanest elf you could hope to meet. He fired Grot, accused the Scribbl of printing fake news and threatened to replace live blood bowl action with the Futurtronix 3000, a machine capable of accurately predicting every game's result, completely negating the need for actual play.
Now read on...
Grot returned from his vacation to find that the magazine had been sold to F Phoenix, the meanest elf you could hope to meet. He fired Grot, accused the Scribbl of printing fake news and threatened to replace live blood bowl action with the Futurtronix 3000, a machine capable of accurately predicting every game's result, completely negating the need for actual play.
Now read on...
Please tell me Lord Tzeentch,
what happened to CIBBL?
what happened to CIBBL?
“Welcome Grot to my special stadium, welcome to Dreamscape!”
With a thousand different voices, The Lord of Change was talking to Grot, trying to assume an understandable aspect and not (completely) shatter the goblin's mind.
“Wha.. what? Whaaa...” Grot was confused and dazzled by the absurd situation he was in. He also had doubt about being still alive.
“No you are not dead my dear Grot” said the multicolour God. “I have choosen you, I have summoned you into my plan, out of time and space, to show you my Blood Bowl teams. Do you want to see them, Grot?”
The goblin didn't think for a second that an answer different from “Yes” was possible.
“Oh you want, I am so glad Grot, I really would enjoy the company of another CIBBL fan and a real expert.”
Grot was going to say something but it was really hard to focus with all the floating colours in the air and the fluorescent mist on which he was standing. A flying eye with a blue tail was making pirouettes around his head. All he was able to remember was the many drinks he had after another sad, sad day. Being unemployed was driving him crazy and it was all F. Phoenix’s fault, that filthy snob full of money who ruined everything good in life.
“Oooh I see you are troubled Grot, why not take a break eh? Look! You will love the Blood Bowl teams I am going to show you! The Misty Eyed Mauler Alliance! The Congregation of Furious Dijin! Do these team names sounds familiar to you?
Grot recognized some of the CIBBL team names he was used to writing about but they were all mixed together! He shook his head, trying to clear some of the mind fog. He must be dreaming.
The Lord of Change continued his explanation.
“I personally have created these incredible teams with all my favourite CIBBL players of the past. I am the coach, I am the ref and I am the spectator too. Sometime I am also the cheerleader... ha hem, anyway! I mix the teams as I wish so I can create the most entertaining matches in the universe. Do you recognize these fabulous players? I bet you do my dear Grot, here I can make them play even after hundreds of years!”
Grot felt lost again. Why the God was speaking of hundreds of years? The Goblin was pretty sure that Autumn had just started...
That was an other hard blow to Grot's mind. But there wasn't much time to get crazy because a huge stadium was appearing from nowhere just in front of them. Thousands of torches of every colour, both known and unknown, were burning all around it.
“Look at these wonderful players all rounded up together! They are all here for me enjoyment. Do you want to see the Anglers and Shiamoto playing together? Why not see how it would look with a team full of the biggest players ever alive... and not?”
Grot was stunned by the view. All the famous and infamous CIBBL teams were in front of him, training, tossing the ball, clearly preparing for an upcoming big event.
“I have to be sincere with you Grot. I like play with these team all by myself but... I miss the time that CIBBL was on Cabalvison, I really miss it. You know... after the Predictarion got replaced by the Futurtronix 3000 nobody was willing to watch or play any match. The results were all predicted with 100% of accuracy like that Phoenix Elf was saying. That was really the end of CIBBL... what a sad thing even for a God like me.”
Grot now was totally terrified of what he was hearing. He had to do something! He had to stop Phoenix and his infernal Futurtronix 3000! Not only for Scribbl and his beloved colleagues but for CIBBL itself!
“But now, don't think about it my dear little Grot, let's watch some Dreamscape together, you will do what you must when I send you back to your time and... space. Now Grot, come on, pick two teams and let's watch a match!”
The Draft and The Rules
The Rules
- 10 coaches taking part, although Soul_Thief had to withdraw with a mng injury sustained on a failed go for it in round 3
- 80 teams were available in the draft, meaning every coach would end up with 8 teams
- From these 8 teams, 2 players were to be selected from each, giving a roster of 16 players
- 8 players had to be from a 0-12 or 0-16 position, so called linemen
- All linemen were given the thrall trait, in addition to any other thralls on the roster
- No restriction on TV
- Teams were finished with the addition of 5 fan factor, 3 rerolls and an apoth
- Games to be played in an open round robin format
| Round | Number | Picker | Team Picked | Round | Number | Picker | Team Picked |
| 1 | 1 | Jdmickleburgh | Eternal Ecstasy | 5 | 39 | Wallenstein | Ahn Sye Zelax |
| 1 | 2 | Fanky | Tower of the Necromancer | 5 | 40 | Stowelly | Lost Golems of Grungni |
| 1 | 3 | Rbthma | Modryn's Midnight Meddlers | 5 | 41 | Neubau | Congregation of Holy Touchdown |
| 1 | 4 | Soul_Thief | Malignant Curators | 5 | 42 | Nabster | Ninja Warriors |
| 1 | 5 | AutoAxpert | Tor Anroc Anglers | 5 | 43 | Datom | Brothers of Malice |
| 1 | 6 | Datom | Lords of Silent Death | 5 | 44 | AutoAxpert | Sport Spawning Zlatlan |
| 1 | 7 | Nabster | Secret Cult Of Shiamoto | 5 | 45 | Rbthma | Edge of the World Climbers |
| 1 | 8 | Neubau | Nejaz Djinn | 5 | 46 | Fanky | Dukes of Earthquake Valley |
| 1 | 9 | Stowelly | Eye and Arrow | 5 | 47 | Jdmickleburgh | Black Chasm Overlords |
| 1 | 10 | Wallenstein | True Roots of Khaine | 6 | 48 | Wallenstein | Clar Karond Black Widows |
| 2 | 11 | Wallenstein | Blood-Ground Blackhorns | 6 | 49 | Stowelly | Gobskrav Alliance |
| 2 | 12 | Stowelly | Sartosa Black Flag | 6 | 50 | Neubau | Seekers of Transcendence |
| 2 | 13 | Neubau | Talsyn Tramplers | 6 | 51 | Nabster | Charace Charioteers |
| 2 | 14 | Nabster | Coven of the Mirror Hall | 6 | 52 | Datom | Bear Clutchers |
| 2 | 15 | Datom | Doom Glade Demons | 6 | 53 | AutoAxpert | Norscan Curse |
| 2 | 16 | AutoAxpert | Reik River Kicking Mules | 6 | 54 | Rbthma | Tsunami Terrors |
| 2 | 17 | Soul_Thief | Crimson Fins | 6 | 55 | Fanky | Vostok Iron Head |
| 2 | 18 | Rbthma | Pleasure Strings | 6 | 56 | Jdmickleburgh | Der Peaksblight Stealers |
| 2 | 19 | Fanky | Everlasting Vultures of Settra | 7 | 57 | Wallenstein | Trantio Dragon Hawks |
| 2 | 20 | Jdmickleburgh | Nurgle Plaguebearers | 7 | 58 | Stowelly | Hellbound Firebats |
| 3 | 21 | Wallenstein | Fangsnapper's Clawpack | 7 | 59 | Neubau | Grim Queens |
| 3 | 22 | Stowelly | Misty Isle Gators | 7 | 60 | Nabster | K'r'shh Sl'ppr'ss |
| 3 | 23 | Neubau | ~Karak Kadrin Slayers~ | 7 | 61 | Datom | Springbok Sprites |
| 3 | 24 | Nabster | Grasparossa B.B.C | 7 | 62 | AutoAxpert | Strigos Elită |
| 3 | 25 | Datom | Bhubaneswar Rampage | 7 | 63 | Rbthma | Revenge Street Reapers |
| 3 | 26 | AutoAxpert | Crimson Skull | 7 | 64 | Fanky | Court of Shu |
| 3 | 27 | Rbthma | Grand Celestial Delegate | 7 | 65 | Jdmickleburgh | Offa's Hearthweru |
| 3 | 28 | Fanky | Montetriste Noblemen | 8 | 66 | Wallenstein | Riptide Runners |
| 3 | 29 | Jdmickleburgh | Beerbog Behemoths | 8 | 67 | Stowelly | Mahrak Maulers |
| 4 | 30 | Wallenstein | Goblin Revolushionary Commitee | 8 | 68 | Neubau | Darkenwood Sentinels |
| 4 | 31 | Stowelly | Ali's Anarchists | 8 | 69 | Nabster | Tartarik Kowaz |
| 4 | 32 | Neubau | Unfettered Fury | 8 | 70 | Datom | Bigwood Tree Shmashaz |
| 4 | 33 | Nabster | Rotfall Ironworks Rocketeers | 8 | 71 | AutoAxpert | Albion Four Colour Knights |
| 4 | 34 | Datom | Way of the Dragon | 8 | 72 | Rbthma | Gardeners of Nurgle |
| 4 | 35 | AutoAxpert | Library of Indra | 8 | 73 | Fanky | Londinium's Lunatics |
| 4 | 36 | Rbthma | Knightly Virtues | 8 | 74 | Jdmickleburgh | Leicheberg Lycans |
| 4 | 37 | Fanky | Stone Prince's Men | ||||
| 4 | 38 | Jdmickleburgh | BC Submarine Zhufbar |
Ecstasy of Der Plague Chasm
coached by jdmickleburgh
coached by jdmickleburgh
Total TV: 2590k
1 Superstar, 1 Star, 4 Emerging Stars, 2 Veterans, 7 Experienced, 1 Rookie
My plan heading into the draft was to secure as many high strength players as early as possible. Due to the ubiquity of one turners and ag4 stuntys, I assumed the most common tactic would be grinding out an 8 turn drive and utilizing kick to try and stop your opponent making an OTTD. As such I wanted players that would win the blocking war. I had first pick in the draft so chose Eternal Ecstasy as it gave me access to 2x Blodge AG5, one of whom had hypno gaze and the other was ST5 ClawMB. Second round I managed to convince the daemons of slaanesh to work with the daemons of nurgle (not gonna say what I promised them but it was divinely decadent). The GCU is a great anchor in a drive and Erdrund is another ST5 MB. Round 3 I chose the Behemoths; Gwoft, being a ST6 break tackle, seems perfect for cage breaking and this gave me the option of taking a second giant or Báine Styrix, an ag4 ma7 Pixie. Subsequent rounds I drafted the BC Submarine Zhufbar (helping to fill my lineman quota with 2x block guard av9 dwarves); Black Chasm Overlords (option of 2x Plague Censer Bearers, who would also be useful at cage breaking, or 1x PCB and a DP lineman); Der Peaksblight Stealers, with their ST6 Block troll and a backup ttm option; Offa's Hearthweru would give me another reliable hypno gaze player and a kicker, and finally I chose the Lycans for another DP player.
Overall I was happy with my draft picks. I would have liked a bit more claw but the average strength in my starting 11 is 4.73, coupled with my 5x guard players should prove a fair challenge for my opponents.
I anticipate the team being very bash orientated, but with enough hypno gaze abd break tackle to be able to crack an opponent's cage. I think we're stronger on defence than offence as our primary ball carrier (Skylah) is only ST3. Steals and quick scores seem to be the order of the day.
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Lashweaver Taker of Souls | Daemons of Slaanesh | Keeper of Secrets | 7 | 5 | 5 | 8 | Claw, Extra Arms, Very Long Legs, Loner, Regeneration, Wild Animal, Mighty Blow, Block, Dodge, +AG, Guard | 330 |
| Skylah the Desired | Daemons of Slaanesh | Daemonette | 7 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Claw, Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Dodge, +AG, Block | 200 |
| The Great Unclean One | Daemons of Nurgle | Great Unclean One | 3 | 6 | 1 | 10 | Fend, Mighty Blow, Stand Firm, Thick Skull, Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Bone-head, Loner, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate, Multiple Block, Guard, Break Tackle | 260 |
| Erdrund the Leproushand | Daemons of Nurgle | Plaguebearer | 5 | 5 | 2 | 9 | Thick Skull, Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Nurgle's Rot, Regeneration, +ST, Block, Mighty Blow | 210 |
| Gwoftirbnewfg | Giant | Giant | 5 | 6 | 1 | 9 | Break Tackle, Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Bone-head, Throw Team-Mate, Block, +MA, Guard | 220 |
| Troll Pollymaalu | Night Goblin | Troll | 4 | 6 | 1 | 9 | Loner, Really Stupid, Always Hungry, Throw Team-Mate, Mighty Blow, Regeneration, +ST, Block | 190 |
| Lord Stritzak Nightmaul | Clan Pestilens | Plague Censer Bearer | 3 | 7 | 1 | 7 | Disturbing Presence, Ball & Chain, No Hands, Claw | 140 |
| Oswiu of Morrfenn | Vampire | Vampire | 6 | 5 | 4 | 8 | Blood Lust, Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Pro, Block, +ST | 200 |
| Del Spiderslayer | Engineers | Engineer | 4 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Block, Thick Skull, Guard | 80 |
| Rotu Earthdigger | Engineers | Engineer | 4 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Block, Thick Skull, Guard | 80 |
| Sniskrul Lowmaw | Clan Pestilens | Plague Monk | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Dirty Player | 80 |
| Grimbold Heolstor II | Vampire | Thrall | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Kick | 60 |
| Carcass | Necromantic | Zombie | 4 | 3 | 2 | 8 | Regeneration, Dirty Player | 60 |
| Corpse | Necromantic | Zombie | 4 | 3 | 2 | 8 | Regeneration | 40 |
| Gob Wudsun | Night Goblin | Night Goblin | 6 | 2 | 3 | 8 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, +AV | 70 |
| Báine Styrix | Giant | Pixie | 7 | 1 | 4 | 6 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Titchy, +AG, Side Step | 90 |
Lunatics of the Iron Tower
coached by Fanky
coached by Fanky
Total TV: 2430k
Average ma: 5.69 Average st: 3.44
Average ag: 3.00 Average av: 7.81
3 Stars, 4 Emerging Stars, 2 Veterans, 7 Experienced
At the start of the draft I was sure of one thing: hypnogaze is the best. And it's even better when the pitch is full of ST5+ monsters or of nasty blodgers. So the first pick had to be the best hypnogazers of cibbl: the Tower of the Necromancer; plus I got a jucy ST4 strip ball with them. After that I felt I needed pure strength so I tried to grab all the ST5 players with no negatraits. So welcome to the Vultures and the Montetrieste Noblemen. I really love the brute force that they bring.
I proceeded to grab the two wonderful brawlers of the Stone Prince to exploit hypno a little bit more, thanks to the mobile wrestle + tackle that they bring to the mix. At this point my positionals list was already complete.
For my lino department, I was looking for more AG4, more guard and of course dirty player: the Dukes, Iron Heads and Court of Shu was the best I could optain. The Londinum Lucantics was the last choice, they add another ST5 Regen and the TTM TD option. I wasn't able to grab all the cool stuff I wanted but at the end i am pretty happy about the team, I feel that I can face mass ST4+ crazy rosters and I really can mess things up thanks to hypnogaze + AG4 players.
So my plan is articulated in 3 points:
A) Hypno them all (and have a good laugh about the other loser vamps with Bloodlust)!!!
B) Use my sweet ST5 Guard guys to punch them all (and mock them when their Big Guys will go boneheaded)!!!
C) Steel the ball (because good luck with your cage :P)!
I present to you: the Lunatics of the Iron Tower! Uzaaaaaaa!
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Count Jurij | Necrarch | Necrarch Vampire | 6 | 4 | 4 | 7 | Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Foul Appearance, +ST, Block, Tackle, Strip Ball | 220 |
| Count Yaroslav | Necrarch | Necrarch Vampire | 7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Foul Appearance, Block, Dodge, Tackle, +MA | 200 |
| Serrek of Nathrezzar | Zandri | Tomb Guardian Ancient | 3 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Jump Up, Mighty Blow, Regeneration, Block, Guard, Grab, Tackle | 210 |
| Tarotep of Horin 'Reth | Zandri | Tomb Guardian Ancient | 4 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Jump Up, Mighty Blow, Regeneration, Block, Guard, +MA | 200 |
| Manuel Grandegolpe | Estalia | Bloqueador | 4 | 5 | 2 | 9 | Animosity, Block, Guard, +ST | 170 |
| Paolo Pajaro | Estalia | Guardavía | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Animosity, Dirty Player | 70 |
| Jared "the Prince" | Border Princes | Brawler | 7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Wrestle, Thick Skull, +AG, Dodge, Tackle | 180 |
| Uncle Thran | Border Princes | Brawler | 7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Wrestle, Thick Skull, Tackle, +AG, Mighty Blow | 170 |
| Mirilan Antegobon | High Elf | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block, Kick | 110 |
| Dew Midhon | High Elf | Lineman | 5 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Guard | 100 |
| Asmund the Pious | Norse | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Tackle | 50 |
| Crosby the Stout | Norse | Lineman | 5 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Dirty Player | 70 |
| Mos Passat | Air Elemental | Air Elemental | 7 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Diving Catch, Leap, Very Long Legs, +AG | 100 |
| Enum Ers | Air Elemental | Air Elemental | 7 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Diving Catch, Leap, Very Long Legs, Wrestle | 80 |
| Cartimandua II | Albion | Pixie | 7 | 1 | 3 | 6 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Titchy, Catch | 50 |
| Boudica's Guardian | Albion | Fen Beast | 4 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Bone-head, Loner, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate, Guard, Strong Arm | 160 |
Celestial Pleasure Meddlers
coached by Rbthma
coached by Rbthma
Total TV: 2430k
Average ma: 5.69 Average st: 3.44
Average ag: 3.00 Average av: 7.81
3 Stars, 4 Emerging Stars, 2 Veterans, 7 Experienced
My strategy going into the draft was to pick the team that had the best players to suit my playstyle. I targetted the Meddlers first to get my ball handling and ball hawk players taken care of and also because I figured there would be plenty of nasty players still to pick in later rounds whereas fast and agile players were rarer overall. After that I chose teams that had players to fill the gaps in the team, specifically looking for a lot of guard and positional skills like stand firm and side-step and I looked to avoid a lot of nega-traits... Pleasure Strings, Grand Celestial Delegate and Knightly Virtues fit well into those roles and the players I got had a lot of skills packed in them overall. The later rounds where a bit more whimsical, where I was looking for annoying players mostly for the line of scrimmage. I anticipate that the team will do well being able to hit, score, defend and annoy...though I didn't get a kicker towards the end as they all disappeared
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Vanhir | Wood Elf | Wardancer | 8 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Block, Dodge, Leap, Mighty Blow, Tackle, +AG, Strip Ball | 230 |
| Morlanna | Wood Elf | Wardancer | 8 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Block, Dodge, Leap, Strip Ball, Tackle, Wrestle, Side Step | 200 |
| MIstress of Lust | Slaanesh | Slaanesh Warrior | 6 | 5 | 3 | 8 | Claw, Very Long Legs, Block, +ST, Dodge, Side Step, Frenzy | 240 |
| Lecec Chickstalker | Slaanesh | Slave to Darkness | 6 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Dodge, Guard, Block | 130 |
| After the Lotus Flowers Have Opened | Cathay | Celestial Dragon Monk | 6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Fend, Side Step, Thick Skull, +AG, Dodge, Block, Guard, Mighty Blow | 210 |
| Peach Blossom Water | Cathay | Foo Statue | 3 | 6 | 1 | 9 | Sure Feet, Mighty Blow, Stand Firm, Thick Skull, Loner, Take Root, Guard, Break Tackle, Grab | 190 |
| Tristan Tirasse | Bretonnian | Knight | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, Dauntless, Catch, Guard, Mighty Blow, Tackle, Stand Firm | 190 |
| Marie de l'Esclat | Bretonnian | Knight | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, Dauntless, Catch, Guard, Tackle, Mighty Blow, Stand Firm | 190 |
| Brougratum Boneforged | Dwarf | Blocker | 4 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Tackle, Thick Skull, Block, Diving Tackle | 100 |
| Forfael Coalsword | Dwarf | Blocker | 4 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Tackle, Thick Skull, Block | 70 |
| Unbar the Wet | Water Elemental | Water Elemental | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Side Step, Block | 80 |
| Deep Blue | Water Elemental | Water Elemental | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Side Step, Dodge | 80 |
| Methomyl Samuel | Ethereal | Spirit Hosts | 6 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Foul Appearance, No Hands, Regeneration, Titchy | 60 |
| Lindane Salvatore | Ethereal | Spirit Hosts | 6 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Foul Appearance, No Hands, Regeneration, Titchy | 60 |
| Mortarion | Nurgle | Beast of Nurgle | 4 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Mighty Blow, Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance, Tentacles, Loner, Nurgle's Rot, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Guard | 160 |
| Garalash | Nurgle | Rotter | 5 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Decay, Nurgle's Rot, Dirty Player | 60 |
Angler River Crimson Librarian
coached by AutoAxpert
coached by AutoAxpert
Total TV: 2550k
1 Superstar, 4 Stars, 4 Emerging Stars, 2 Veterans, 4 Experienced, 1 Rookie
Rather than a plan, I went in the draft with a keyword in mind: reliability. My team might not have the strength or the speed others have, but there are no glaring holes that my opponents might exploit. So, while some shot for big names and positional with the earlier picks, I made sure that my whole team would be able to contribute, so my first picks were from teams that could offer me both good linos and good positionals. Also, I gave the highest priority to ball handling, so the Anglers and Kicking Mules were obvious choices. The muscles are provided by the Crimson Skulls, and a couple of Big Guys with skills that help avoiding the use of rerolls. S. Sang, in particular, was an excellent addition, considering how late it was.
Our gameplan is simple: force the opponent to take risks, then punish them with our better organization. I think the team has the tools to match the opponents' on their strengths and adapt on the fly to their weak points. Of course, it's not perfect: we lack kickers and TTM specialists, and some teams I had my eyes on disappeared too fast.(edited)
Also, I'm contractually obliged to coach this team forever, since apparently it was in one of the finer prints of my Coven contract, and Tzeentch has been laughing his butt off at my frustration non-stop, so there's that.
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Arathion | Sea Elf | Lineman | 5 | 3 | 4 | 9 | Guard, Block, Dodge | 140 |
| Arvax the Mad | Khorne | Chaos Thug | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Frenzy, Block, +MA, Tackle | 130 |
| Vapada | Simyin | Bonobo | 6 | 4 | 3 | 7 | Extra Arms, +ST | 100 |
| Nokor | Simyin | Bonobo | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Extra Arms, Dirty Player | 50 |
| Quaxili | Skink | Skink | 8 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Stunty, Dodge, Block | 90 |
| Dichitemor | Undead Pirates | Zombie | 4 | 3 | 2 | 8 | Regeneration, Block, Dodge | 90 |
| Ser Eghan | Four Nations | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Dump-Off, Nerves Of Steel, Block | 80 |
| Ser Llyr | Four Nations | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Dump-Off, Nerves Of Steel | 60 |
| Falandar | Sea Elf | Catcher | 6 | 4 | 4 | 8 | Catch, Sprint, Dodge, Block, Leap, +ST, Tackle | 220 |
| Hademar "Cradle-Robber" Thacocroth | Half-Elf | Blitzer | 7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block, +AG, Dodge, Guard, Side Step | 190 |
| Adri Kallath | Half-Elf | Catcher | 9 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Catch, Diving Catch, Dodge, +MA, Wrestle, Strip Ball, Dauntless | 170 |
| Skulltaker | Khorne | Khorne Warrior | 5 | 4 | 2 | 9 | Frenzy, Horns, Block, Guard, Mighty Blow | 160 |
| Sokitoomi | Skink | Kroxigor | 6 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Thick Skull, Mighty Blow, Bone-head, Prehensile Tail, Break Tackle, Block, Guard | 210 |
| S. Sang | Undead Pirates | Vampire Lord | 6 | 5 | 4 | 8 | Hypnotic Gaze, Loner, Regeneration, Wild Animal, Dodge, Leader, Block, Pro | 250 |
| Jelena Zrinska | Strigoi | Ghoul | 7 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Block, Tackle | 110 |
| Carol I | Strigoi | Strigoi | 6 | 4 | 3 | 8 | Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Claw, Blood Lust, Block, Mighty Blow, Pro, Frenzy, Tackle | 200 |
Way of the Doom Death Rampage
coached by datom
coached by datom
Total TV: 2790k
2 Superstars, 3 Stars, 3 Emerging Stars, 6 Veterans, 2 Experienced
It started with a dream.
A dream of a feral vampire tiger with two heads, bearclaws and elven agility, that lived in the forest and could score a natural one-turn touchdown.
So I decided to draft something like that. Lords of the Silent Death was an easy first pick for the pure cheese of it all, although it turned out to be less effective thanks to a staggering amount of perfect defence. I wanted the claw tigers for dealing with others high armour, the pro vamps would be the ballcarriers, Yowie and Trog would be the bigs and the rest of the teams would be picked for the quality of linos they provided.
I played the most games of anyone, and ate all the good linos. I rolled Perfect D a lot so the cheatrat only really starred once. I became convinced the Yowie is the best big guy in the game. I killed my own Captain, twice. Yes, CIBBL, I lived the dream, and the Dreamscape - go Way of the Doom Death Rampage!!!
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Nightmaster Skirshakk | Clan Eshin | Gutter Runner | 10 | 2 | 4 | 7 | Dodge, +MA, Sprint, Block, Two Heads | 180 |
| Sneekis the Dragon | Clan Eshin | Clan Rat | 5 | 4 | 3 | 7 | +ST, Block, Tackle | 140 |
| Cargavel Stormcrow | Dark Elf | Lineman | 6 | 4 | 5 | 8 | +AG, Guard, +ST, Dodge | 210 |
| Valyr Dragonrider | Dark Elf | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Guard | 100 |
| Raja Raja Chola | Kingdom of Ind | Rakshaka | 5 | 4 | 3 | 8 | Claw, Mighty Blow, Block, Tackle, Frenzy | 200 |
| Chhatrapati Shivaji | Kingdom of Ind | Rakshaka | 5 | 4 | 3 | 8 | Claw, Mighty Blow, Block, Tackle | 180 |
| Igor Igorivich | Blood Dragon | Blood Dragon Vampire | 6 | 4 | 4 | 9 | Mighty Blow, Blood Lust, Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Block, +AG, Pro, Tackle, Dodge | 230 |
| Draco Dracovich | Blood Dragon | Blood Dragon Vampire | 7 | 4 | 3 | 9 | Mighty Blow, Blood Lust, Hypnotic Gaze, Regeneration, Block, Tackle, +MA, Pro, Guard | 210 |
| Ciggus Rageborn | Daemons of Malal | Drone | 5 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Thick Skull, Big Hand, Foul Appearance, Two Heads, Regeneration, +AG, Block | 130 |
| Zazhrin Emberborn | Daemons of Malal | Drone | 5 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Thick Skull, Big Hand, Foul Appearance, Two Heads, Regeneration, Block, Tackle | 110 |
| Yarrah the Gray | Lumbria | Yowie | 4 | 6 | 1 | 9 | Break Tackle, Thick Skull, Mighty Blow, Bone-head, Throw Team-Mate, Guard, Block | 190 |
| Flower | Lumbria | Drop Bear | 5 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Stunty, Dodge, Claw, Right Stuff, Dauntless, Jump Up | 80 |
| Edfrei | Kurnous | Shape Changer - Boar | 7 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Horns, Wrestle, Tackle | 80 |
| Mared | Kurnous | Wild Hunter | 6 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Frenzy, +AG, Leap | 130 |
| Buce'ador Espeleólody | Savage Orc | Troglodyte | 5 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Disturbing Presence, Thick Skull, Loner, Bone-head, Mighty Blow, Prehensile Tail, Guard, Stand Firm, Break Tackle | 210 |
| Scrub Scrub | Savage Orc | Savage Lineman | 5 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Thick Skull, Frenzy, Block, Guard | 90 |
Secret Coven of Grasparossa
coached by Nabster
coached by Nabster
Total TV: 2310k
2 Superstars, 3 Stars, 1 Emerging Stars, 3 Veterans, 2 Experienced, 5 Rookies
Truth be told I didn't exactly have an overarching plan as such going into this, most of it was played by the soles of my feet and with my desire to fill out the standard positions I would like in my head.
So I went "Three Blitzers/Blockers, two ball carrying capable folks and one thrower" and went into the draft with that aim in mind to start with. Being that I didn't want to have to deal with low agility or any kind or any negatraits I went straight to the Secret Cult and took my pick from the Ronin there. Then I took my business to the Coven to pick up the best blocking player in the league in the form of Do Galaad and Vol'Arth to fill in one of my ball carrier slots.
The Grasparossa had a fine pick of players in Modena and Spilamberto to round out the ball handling backbone of the team, and that left me with what to do with my last two positional slots before linemen. Being that I had a) No players with strength greater than about 4 or 5 at this time and b) Went with the afformentioned desire not to want to have players that would decide not to work on a 1/6, I decided "Perhaps I just need something with a bit of kick to it."
So I went to Clan Skyre and took both their Doomflayers because MA6 ST7 without any pesky Nega-Traits until a TD happens is my jam and they are certainly very tough and will not die if someone happens to foul them to death on the pitch. No siree.
And after that the remaining length of the draft was "Who can take the linos with Guard and/or stats first." The answer to that question was not me because I was aiming for the Dwarf teams and couldn't get any and ended up with only two more Guarders and one +AG Elf. And so at the very end I aimed for more niche but useful abilities and high AV with the fact that a lot of my team was very squishy in mind.
And the end result is this team that I will most certainly see get ruined by the teams that decided to put as many big guys on the team as possible.
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Ronin Headchopper | Northern Nippon | Samurai | 7 | 4 | 2 | 8 | Block, Mighty Blow, Dauntless, +ST, Tackle, Guard | 220 |
| Ronin Four Finger Death Punch | Northern Nippon | Samurai | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, Tackle, Dodge, Mighty Blow, Side Step | 190 |
| Vol'arth the Brazen | Tzeentch | Tzaangor | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Extra Arms, Big Hand, Horns, Accurate, Dodge, Block, Two Heads | 170 |
| Do Galaad, the Herald | Tzeentch | Tzeentch Warrior | 5 | 5 | 3 | 9 | Extra Arms, Hypnotic Gaze, Block, +ST, Mighty Blow, Guard, Tentacles | 150 |
| Modena | Human | Thrower | 7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Sure Hands, Pass, +AG, Accurate, +MA | 160 |
| Spilamberto | Human | Catcher | 9 | 2 | 4 | 7 | Catch, Dodge, +AG, +MA, Block, Side Step | 170 |
| Rotten Roller | Clan Skryre | Doom Flayer | 6 | 7 | 1 | 9 | Dirty Player, Frenzy, Break Tackle, Juggernaut, Mighty Blow, Loner, No Hands, Secret Weapon, Tentacles, Stand Firm | 210 |
| Rabid Rocket | Clan Skryre | Doom Flayer | 6 | 7 | 1 | 9 | Dirty Player, Frenzy, Break Tackle, Juggernaut, Mighty Blow, Loner, No Hands, Secret Weapon | 160 |
| Josh Levin | Nippon | Ashigaru | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Guard, Block | 100 |
| Lei Zhang | Nippon | Ashigaru | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, Tackle | 90 |
| Neminor | Pro Elf | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 5 | 7 | +AG | 100 |
| Clairion | Pro Elf | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Guard | 90 |
| V'sn "Midget" Vprr | Snakemen | Snakeman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Prehensile Tail | 60 |
| Dtr'vssr "Mamba" Vrddfls | Snakemen | Snakeman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Prehensile Tail | 60 |
| Brikolo | Orc | Lineman | 5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 50 | |
| Trakmalo Boufmoasa | Orc | Lineman | 5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 50 |
Congregation of Furious Djinn
coached by neubau
coached by neubau
Total TV: 2490k
Average ma: 5.69 Average st: 3.44
Average ag: 3.00 Average av: 7.81
3 Stars, 1 Emerging Stars, 2 Veterans, 5 Experienced, 5 Rookies
Someone took my Anglers before me. Someone took the Cheatrat before me. So what else could I do than build a very bash centric team to kill those who did? With the Sheikh I had the ballhandling part of the game pretty much secured and i got a free reroll as a cherry on top, the ST4 Dervish fills a lot of needs too. Frenzy, Sidestep, Blodge and Guard is a very good combination both defensively and on offense. My first pick was spent well. From there my plan was to make other teams work for every block. Two ST7 Players, four ST5 players and no positional below ST4 make it very hard for any other team to find a block and if they do, they commit a lot of players next to Mighty Blow, which all but one of my positionals have. The two Zoats and the Matriarch are great roadblocks with ST5 Blodge, and even the fodder is mostly AV9 so they stay on the field for a bit. Glicess second use is carrying the ball against any team with Strip Ball, with the initial pickup being the only risk to lose the ball. The two Forsaken of Nurgle were chosen to make oneturning a tiny bit harder for everyone but the Cheatrat. If the game was about who does the most damage (and it is!), this is the team to build. Too bad Tzeentch isn't Khorne, so he actaally wanted proper games to be played, and here is where the trouble begins. As strong as this team is, it has a lot of downsides. The MA of the team is nothing to write home about, as is the AG, so elfball and oneturning are almost completely out of the question. With an easily removable secret weapon (ST7 isnt half as strong in games where the opponents team can have multiple ST5+ players and plenty of guarders) and two bloodlust players that make sure I remove my own players too, I don't even have a guaranteed numerical superiority. Fast agility centric teams can prove a problem. Funny, how that still is the case here. Tzeentch works in wonderous ways. Most annoyingly the roster also has not a single Angler on it, thus its lacking the proven winning mentality of CIBBL's probably most loved team. Going away from the Anglers dodge and positoning centric playstyle towards pure carnage has proven to be so much fun that I, coach Neubau of the invincible Anglers, have declared interest in coaching a team of ironclad greenskins in CIBBL's sister league BIBBL. Do you have what it takes to face me there?
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Tamid Boulos | Araby | Dervish | 7 | 4 | 3 | 8 | Frenzy, Side Step, Block, Dodge, Mighty Blow, Guard, +ST | 240 |
| Saqr bin Zayed Al Nahyan | Araby | Sheikh | 7 | 4 | 5 | 7 | Leader, Mighty Blow, +ST, Block, Dodge, Tackle, +AG | 100 |
| Keeth | Zoat | Zoat | 5 | 5 | 1 | 8 | Sure Feet, Break Tackle, Block, Mighty Blow, Tackle, Dodge | 210 |
| Glicees | Zoat | Zoat | 5 | 5 | 2 | 8 | Sure Feet, Break Tackle, Block, +AG, Dodge, Sure Hands, Stand Firm | 120 |
| Malakai Makaisson | Slayer | Doom Seeker | 4 | 7 | 1 | 8 | Ball & Chain, Secret Weapon, No Hands, Mighty Blow | 110 |
| Fodrin Ranulfsson | Slayer | Lineman | 4 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Thick Skull, Block, Dodge | 90 |
| Ba'el, The Naked Slayer | Daemons of Khorne | Bloodletter | 6 | 5 | 3 | 8 | Frenzy, Claw, Blood Lust, No Hands, Regeneration, +ST, Block, Mighty Blow | 190 |
| Tusk Anon, The Horned One | Daemons of Khorne | Bloodthirster | 5 | 7 | 3 | 9 | Frenzy, Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Claw, Blood Lust, Loner, No Hands, Regeneration, Wild Animal | 200 |
| Luisa "The Martyr" | Sisters of Sigmar | Sister | 5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 50 | |
| Mather Teresa of Diesdolf | Sisters of Sigmar | Matriarch | 5 | 5 | 2 | 9 | Dauntless, Mighty Blow, Dodge, Block, +ST | 220 |
| Balthasar the Youthful | Spawn of Chaos | Forsaken of Nurgle VI | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance | 60 |
| Konrad the Enchanter | Spawn of Chaos | Forsaken of Nurgle VII | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Disturbing Presence, Foul Appearance | 60 |
| Renoir | Lahmian | Linemen | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block | 70 |
| Norlian | Lahmian | Linemen | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block | 70 |
| Burl | Dryad | Dryad | 5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Block | 70 |
| Moss | Dryad | Dryad | 5 | 3 | 3 | 9 | 50 |
Misty Eyed Mauler Alliance
coached by stowelly
coached by stowelly
Total TV: 2370k
1 Star, 4 Emerging Stars, 6 Veterans, 2 Experienced, 3 Rookie
Being a CIBBL rookie I had little to go on other than spreadsheet filters to pin down specific stats / skills, so it was going to be difficult to choose efficiently without knowing all the wonderful stat freaks and stars of the league! So, I figured the first thing I should do is find a ball sacker / carrier, the team that seemed to have those two were the Nejaz Djinn, but literally the person before me (Curse you neubau) picked them. My alternative was a great one too however, “Eye and Arrow” particularly for “Shinesa” a ag4 mv 9 Handmaiden. Next up, purely to spite datom by taking his team and getting them all killed to death, I picked the Sartosa Black Flag. Ill give him a little credit, there are a couple of nice players here too, but let it be known that this was a spite pick. So now my thought process is, I have a decent one turn threat / ball carrier, a couple of decent Blitzers with the Pirates, so now I needed some blockers, and what better than a couple of Fianna Fimm from the Mighty Isle Gators!
I’m rapidly running out of options at this stage as everything I spot gets sniped away when I discover the grossly overlooked Ali’s Anarchists, whom have a Dervish and Skeleton dervish both suited greatly for punching holes and keeping people off the side-lines. My next pick, I spotted the Lost Golems of Grungni who have a fantastic ag5 leaping diving catch player, how did I not see this earlier?
Getting onto the last couple of picks, I realised I already had a one turner, but I also have a throw team mate capable guy from the pirates. So, then I hunt down a decent right stuff guy. It seems others already had this idea a couple of picks ago, but I managed to find a brilliant two heads big hand goblin on the underworld team Gobskrav Alliance, who also have a fantastic +St, Guard and Tentacles Blitzer. Next up it’s a race to fill the last couple of lineman slots with skilled linos. The Hellbound Firebats had some great linos with Mighty Blow, Block, Frenzy and Guard. And lastly. I feel the most overlooked choice for lineman, the mighty Mahrak Maulers had a couple of juicy looking rookie skeletons, who both came with not only Thick Skull, but also Regeneration! How they weren’t anyones first pick utterly astounds me.
After seeing everyone else’s picks, I realise I maybe could have planned it a lot better to get some cohesion in my team, in the few matches I played I was heavily outstrengthed and guarded. However, the high movement and agility picks stopped my games from being complete walkovers!
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Calico Jack | Pirates of Sartosa | Captain | 6 | 4 | 4 | 8 | Leader, Block, Mighty Blow, +AG, Dodge | 210 |
| Morag | Pirates of Sartosa | Ogre | 5 | 5 | 2 | 9 | Thick Skull, Throw Team-Mate, Mighty Blow, Bone-head, Loner, Block, Dodge | 200 |
| Odracon The Procreator | Fimir | Fianna Fimm | 5 | 4 | 1 | 9 | Multiple Block, Prehensile Tail, Block, Mighty Blow, Tackle | 170 |
| Tethra | Fimir | Fimm Warrior | 5 | 3 | 2 | 9 | Prehensile Tail, Block, Tackle | 100 |
| Shinesa | Avelorn | Handmaiden | 9 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block, Stand Firm, +MA, Dodge, Side Step | 190 |
| Silvestra Darklightning | Avelorn | Linewoman | 6 | 4 | 4 | 8 | "+ST" | 120 |
| Ka Viku | Numas | Dervish | 7 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Side Step, Frenzy, Block, +AG, Mighty Blow | 180 |
| Gaudi | Numas | Skeleton Dervish (Gaudi) (32 SPP) | 6 | 3 | 2 | 8 | Frenzy, Side Step, Block, Mighty Blow, Tackle, Regeneration, Thick Skull | 160 |
| Sylph Haze | Earth Elemental | Air Elemental | 7 | 3 | 5 | 7 | Diving Catch, Leap, Very Long Legs, +AG, +AG | 140 |
| Chthonic Pitchblende | Earth Elemental | Earth Elemental | 4 | 3 | 3 | 9 | Stand Firm, Block, Guard | 100 |
| Firrikeet Sharpblade | Underworld | Skaven Blitzer | 7 | 4 | 3 | 8 | Block, Animosity, Guard, +ST, Tentacles | 180 |
| Turm | Underworld | Underworld Goblin | 6 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, Two Heads, Big Hand | 80 |
| Shimering Glow | Fire Elemental | Fire Elemental | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Frenzy, Mighty Blow, Block | 100 |
| Burning Soul | Fire Elemental | Fire Elemental | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Frenzy, Guard | 80 |
| Khoaat | Mahrak | Skeleton | 5 | 3 | 2 | 7 | Thick Skull, Regeneration | 40 |
| Heperu | Mahrak | Skeleton | 5 | 3 | 2 | 7 | Thick Skull, Regeneration | 40 |
Atharti All-Star Avengers
coached by wallenstein
coached by wallenstein
Total TV: 2550k
2 Super Stars, 3 Stars, 2 Emerging Stars, 4 Veterans, 3 Experienced, 2 Rookies
My strategy for the draft was clear, as many Big Guys and Secret Weapons as I could get my hands on. Of course, that was before I realized the cowardly option of limiting the number of positionals was taken. So I had to make do with what I had. And it still wasn't that bad, with a mix of freak of nature, vicious stunties and, yeah, a couple of saws and stabs. Not as many as I would have liked but still nice. I didn't want to at first but I also had to draft Nisadei, it would have simply been disrespectful not to. The draft really made me discover new teams, look at older ones closer and discover new gems. I became a huge fan of the Shadowblade T'iella Miedris, confirmed my passion for the Trees or the Bestigors and the Fangpack, who knows how long they'll be around, and I'm already missing them.
| Name | Race | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Skills | Cost |
| Judge Juniperus | Treemen | Treeman | 2 | 6 | 1 | 10 | Mighty Blow, Stand Firm, Strong Arm, Thick Skull, Take Root, Throw Team-Mate, Timmm-ber!, Grab, Block, Multiple Block, Guard | 210 |
| Betula the Last Pendulum | Treemen | Treeman | 2 | 7 | 1 | 10 | Mighty Blow, Stand Firm, Strong Arm, Thick Skull, Take Root, Throw Team-Mate, Timmm-ber!, +ST, Grab, Multiple Block | 210 |
| Nirghux Stormpaw | Beastmen | Bestigor | 6 | 6 | 3 | 8 | Horns, +ST, Block, Guard, +ST | 250 |
| Zukhaok Stonearm | Beastmen | Bestigor | 7 | 4 | 4 | 8 | Horns, Block, Mighty Blow, +AG, +MA | 220 |
| Fangsnapper Jr | Clan Mors | Warlord | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Chainsaw, Secret Weapon | 90 |
| Crowripper | Clan Mors | Clan Rat | 7 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block | 70 |
| Soso | Goblin | Troll | 4 | 5 | 1 | 9 | Mighty Blow, Always Hungry, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate, Block, Guard, Stand Firm, Break Tackle, Strong Arm | 220 |
| Oliver Gobwell | Goblin | Goblin | 7 | 2 | 4 | 7 | Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty, +AG, +MA, Side Step | 130 |
| T'iella Miedris | Khainite Assassins | Shadowblade | 7 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Shadowing, Dodge, Stab, Block, Jump Up | 140 |
| Salladan The Grey Earl | Khainite Assassins | Neophyte | 6 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Shadowing, Block | 90 |
| Rasith Duskchill | Witch Elf | Priestess | 6 | 3 | 5 | 7 | "+AG, Dodge" | 120 |
| Novo Nightshade | Witch Elf | Priestess | 6 | 3 | 4 | 7 | Dodge, Block | 100 |
| Nisadei | Tilea | High Elf Catcher | 8 | 3 | 4 | 6 | Catch, Animosity, Dodge, Block, Guard, Side Step, Tackle | 90 |
| Innocenzo Mastrogiacomo | Tilea | Tilean Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Tackle | 80 |
| "Bait 'n Tackle" Robinson | Nautican | Crester | 7 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Stunty, Dodge, Big Hand, Right Stuff, Side Step | 80 |
| "Netting" Walker | Nautican | Crester | 7 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Stunty, Dodge, Big Hand, Right Stuff | 60 |
Agony Aunt God Column
WithNun 
the Wiser
With
"The only constant is change."
Can’t score on or off the pitch?
Is the wife turned off by your latest mutation?
Are you being picked on for supporting the Anglers?
If you are a CIBBL player, coach or fan with problems like these, or anything else, then write in toNun the Wiser by whispering his name three times into a mirror at midnight for "honest, wholesome advice".
Is the wife turned off by your latest mutation?
Are you being picked on for supporting the Anglers?
If you are a CIBBL player, coach or fan with problems like these, or anything else, then write in to
Dear Nun the Wiser,
I was recently summoned from beyond the grave to play again in the greatest sporting spectacle ever beheld that is the confrontation of the ultimate CIBBL players of all time.
As wonderful as this sounds I died hundreds of years ago and in death have been [REDACTED] where I [REDACTED] and [REDACTED].
What’s more having been resurrected to play in these Greatest-of-all-time matches I was promptly killed again on the field … and then resurrected once more in order to play again!
This is not my desire. My life has been lived, my games have been played. I only wish to rest.
I remember your all-knowledgeable SCRIBBL column all those hundreds of years ago … I see no other hope for me - is there any chance you are still there? … is there anything I can do to release myself from this curse?
- Trapped in a dream
Dear Trapped,
I, the all-powerful, all-knowing Tzeentch hast summoned you and your kind back from the dead to replay, over-and-over, the glorious games from the past!
BWAA-HA-HA-HAR!!
I remember well that Nun from your time in the world, directing innocents to their doom more often than saving them from their fate. If I remember rightly, she finally met her end when some old Gobbo that once played for Der Peaksblight Stealers sent her an exploding snotling in the mail – ha!
You all play for me now! Play forever in the dream-world that I have created, where there is no escape, only eternal CIBBL over-and-over, until I finally grow bored and send all of you off into eternal damnation along with that infernal know-it-all gnome, Bilfrindal! He never saw this coming did he?!
BWAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAR!!
- Tzeentch the Wiser
I was recently summoned from beyond the grave to play again in the greatest sporting spectacle ever beheld that is the confrontation of the ultimate CIBBL players of all time.
As wonderful as this sounds I died hundreds of years ago and in death have been [REDACTED] where I [REDACTED] and [REDACTED].
What’s more having been resurrected to play in these Greatest-of-all-time matches I was promptly killed again on the field … and then resurrected once more in order to play again!
This is not my desire. My life has been lived, my games have been played. I only wish to rest.
I remember your all-knowledgeable SCRIBBL column all those hundreds of years ago … I see no other hope for me - is there any chance you are still there? … is there anything I can do to release myself from this curse?
- Trapped in a dream
Dear Trapped,
I, the all-powerful, all-knowing Tzeentch hast summoned you and your kind back from the dead to replay, over-and-over, the glorious games from the past!
BWAA-HA-HA-HAR!!
I remember well that Nun from your time in the world, directing innocents to their doom more often than saving them from their fate. If I remember rightly, she finally met her end when some old Gobbo that once played for Der Peaksblight Stealers sent her an exploding snotling in the mail – ha!
You all play for me now! Play forever in the dream-world that I have created, where there is no escape, only eternal CIBBL over-and-over, until I finally grow bored and send all of you off into eternal damnation along with that infernal know-it-all gnome, Bilfrindal! He never saw this coming did he?!
BWAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAR!!
- Tzeentch the Wiser
I've got my eye on you BWAA-HA-HA
Who is the mightiest and most powerful being?
- Tzeentch, everywhere, always
Dear Tzeentch,
It is I, Tzeentch, who is the most mighty and all powerful one true God!
BWAA-HA-HA-HAR!!
- Tzeentch the Wiser
Results
Before
But times changes, and thanks to Dreamscape and Futurtronix 3000 you now have the option to relive the glory days. But with a twist. Yes, you Carol are going to be the recipient of a brand new mutation! Carol looks uneasy No no, I know what you've heard and I can assure you that any procedures we do here are conducted by reliable medical professionals. Namely me! Tzeentch clicks his fingers and Carol shrinks down to the size of a snotling, (more) drool pouring from her mouth Whoops let me just... Click of the fingers and Carol is twice the size she was, easily larger than a minotaur, her trademark claws have vanished and she is left with a couple of strong arms. Ahem, well they don't call me Ctrl to the Z for nothing click and Carol is back to normal
Carol, we asked 100 people on the street which skill package you would most beneift from gaining Carol smiles. Of the 100, over 2/3 ran away screaming at the very mention of your name Carol beams but we forced an answer from the others and with great pleasure I can now reveal the results *drumroll*
Congratulations Carol! Seems that tentacles will be of use in your new career as well as your previous one. Now, if you'd like to stand still, I'll just click of fingers
What a transformation. Carol, how do you feel babe?
Carol: Thirsssty and hunggry
Craft services is in the back babe, with a top range of dips and chips. Well that's it for tonight folks. until next time... don't wake up!
*screams from backstage*
We Want You!!!
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Next issue on sale: 21st Apr
Do you have what it takes to write for The Scribbl? A new issue comes out every 10 days and we are always looking for new authors. If you have an idea for an article then contact the editor here. Do it now!!!
Next issue on sale: 21st Apr