Kate Hudson joined the Something's after one too many shitty chick flick's sent her into a depressive slump. She only got out of this severe depressive state after several bottles of pain killers and half a bottle of Smirnoff.

Who the f*ck is Sienna Miller?

Lindsay Lohan joined the Something's after a cocaine fueled header, had her jumping off a 10 story building balcony into what she thought was the hotel swimming pool. Though the swimming pool was present, it was in fact an indoor pool, covered by 3 inch thick reinforced glass.

I have no idea who Kate Bosworth is!

No idea on this one either!

Paris joined the Something's after staring at her self to long in a mirror, entering a state of atrophy, and rotting to death.

Nicole joined the Something's after she was sucked into the black hole that is her career.

Mary joined the team after a much applauded murder suicide, in which John Stamos ended her life with a snub nosed 38 special, before throwing himself legs first into a wood chipper.

Roman regrets his actions. But that doesn't mean he is willing to go to jail for them though.

Angelina joined the team after neglecting her adopted children for several weeks, they turned on her and devoured her in a starvation fueled orgy of violence.

Kate joined the team after having a sexual encounter with Shaq. Enough said really.

A prior team member of the Ydrahorn Bashers. Lindsay Lohan recruited Fabianus in the Something's first blood bowl match. Though the Ydrahorn Bashers took the day, the camaraderie of the Something's was enough to entice Fabianus to his new team... well that and Lindsay Lohan's fist.

Martin is another High Elf that just hated the fact he was an Elf. So in the Something's second match against the Wardens of Saphery, he decided to bite the bullet, literally.

"DO YOU WANNA BE IN MY GANG, MY GANG, MY GANG! DO YOU WANNA BE IN MY GANG..."
Oh no Gary, we really, really don't!

Son was an Orc. He didn't like being an Orc. He smelled, hung out in dark places, and people were scared of him. He started playing Blood Bowl as he thought it might increase his appeal. Even this, however, didn't work. So one day while playing against the Somethings, he thought he would like to try being a zombie. He is full of regret for his hasty decision, but has come to terms with his predicament.