Sojourner
Joined: Aug 25, 2006
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  Posted:
Sep 13, 2006 - 17:58 |
 
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Thrak McGuts: “Welcome back Blood Bowl fiends and fanatics, to yet another edition of ‘Inside the Team’. The only show going where we get you the inside scoop on your favorite teams. Today I am speaking with the Sutton Hoo Havoc, just off or their spectacular 4 to 1 win over Punching Bag Deluxe. Let’s go live to Darrelus Dogstarr, he is with the team at their training center outside of Woodbridge in Suffolk, Albion. Over to you Darrelus!”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Thanks Thrak! I am standing here with some of the key Sutton Hoo players from last night’s match. Let’s start with Aelred the Swift, who’s brilliant catching led to two of the four Havoc touchdowns of the night. Aelred, would you care to comment on last night’s performance?”
Aelred "The Swift": “Vell, first I’d like to thank Frige for making me so fashionably handsome, and granting me the ability to be the star I am! Next I’d vant to thank my sponsors, Blind Eric’s Horn Vax and Polish. And finally, I’d vant to thank my fans, vithout you there would be no Havoc!”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Ok Aelred, about last nights match?”
Aelred "The Swift": “Vhat is there to say? King Raedwald throws the ball, I catch the ball, and run over little vampy-mans. They tried to cast their hypnotic gaze upon my pumped up body, but they cannot vithstand the arua of bear-like power. I smash them, even broke one’s little ribs.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Thanks Aelred. Next up is Aglaeca, the Norse blitzer veteran know also as ‘The Mad’. Aglaeca, what do you have to say about last night’s match against Punching Bag Deluxe?”
Aglaeca "The Mad": “GARRR!!!! BY THE MIGHT OF THUNOR! I rend the flesh and break the bones of my enemies! From their skulls I drink my mead! From their naughty bits I make necklaces! FRARG!!”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Aglaeca, how did your performance impact the overall play of the game?”
Aglaeca "The Mad": “My what?! CURSE YOU AND YOUR DAMN SOCK-PEOPLE! YOU SMOTHERER OF TOES!!! NERTHUS RUMBLES IN DISGUST AT YOUR PERVERSIONS!! …like some stag-jerky? Yarg.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Ahem, so yes. Anyway, onto the undisputed leader of the Sutton Hoo Havoc, Raedwald. Raedwald, what can you tell me of the mental preparations the Havoc went through to get ready for this match?”
King Raedwald: “Bretwalda.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Godzunhiet.”
King Raedwald: “What?”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “You sneezed.”
King Raedwald: “No, I said Bretwalda. I am the Bretwalda.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Excuse me?”
King Raedwald: “THE BRETWALDA! THE KING OF ALL SAXONS YOU FLARGING LOUT!”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Ah I see.”
King Raedwald: “Not for much longer if you don’t kneel in my presence…”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “AH! Oh yes, right away your majesty! Please have Cyneweard put down that rather large axe. Oh thank you m’lord!! So as I was saying, what kind of preparations did your team go through before the match to be so ready to face the Punching Bags?”
King Raedwald: “42 casks of mead.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “So you are attributing your decisive victory to fermented honey liquor?”
King Raedwald: “That and the penalty of death I impose for all failures.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “OH, I can see how that might also be a motivating factor… yes. So what do you see as the other strong points of the team; aside from the gift of your god-like ability to throw the ball my most gracious and (gulp) humble lord?”
King Raedwald: “Our Blitzers are raving loonies. That’s a nice bonus at times- keeps the game interesting you know. Let’s see… having our own Ogre is quite nice as well, but the smell is horrific.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “You’re referring to Grendel, the Havoc’s Ogre who racked up an impressive three casualty total this match. What’s the deal, doesn’t he bathe?”
King Raedwald: “No he bathes often enough, but Halflings give him gas. By Wodan’s beard, is it awful! I think it might be the bones, eating them whole and all…”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “So is (gulp) Grendel available for comment?
King Raedwald: “Not right now, he’s currently participating in our trainer’s cutting-edge custom weight-loss program.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Really? Would mind sharing any details of this high-tech regimen?”
King Raedwald: “Not at all. We’ve now got him pillaging three Elven villages a day. We’re hoping that the increased exercise and elf-tossing might increase his agility a bit.”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Does that normally seem to work?”
King Raedwald: “Not usually, but it is great fun!”
Darrelus Dogstarr: “Well thank you King Readwald for you time. Much luck and good fortune to you and your team in up coming months. That’s all from me, Blood Bowl fans. This is Darrelus Dogstarr signing off, back to Thrack at the studio. ....I’m getting out of here, Agleaca is eying my package for a new necklace!!”[/b] |
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sehou
Joined: Feb 04, 2005
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| Posted:
Sep 13, 2006 - 20:05 |
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Well done man. Seems you enjoy the fluff more than others. Cya for rematch. |
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Astereth
Joined: Sep 05, 2006
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| Posted:
Oct 19, 2006 - 08:09 |
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Great stuff, nice to see some good fluff... And people who know Saxon names and stuff!
Very much in the true vein of BB humour. |
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Gnomes are trash
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