“Eye Of The Maelstrom v's The Wild Bunch
As the teams take to the pitch both are full of confidence, the veterans of the 145 league The Eye ad the reliability of their star blitzers and the Wild bunch had, well, a ton of weapons and a lot of cash to bribe a very dodgy looking ref. With the Gobbos winning the toss things started well for them a round of solid blocks a chainsaw attack from Fkor leaving Razor stunned. The initiative was with them and they secured the ball well with Kazaboubou bouncing his way to a successful pick up. First blood however goes to the Eye when Apollo with the assistance of half his team brings down Fungus the Loon and the star player’s career is cut short after Apollo slams his ball and chain onto his head for the kill. With the Wild bunch wondering why they bothered to pay the loon any money for is services the Eye realise they have sacrificed position and look to reorganise. Before they can react though the Gobbos break forward led by their other investment Nobbla Blackwart who successfully stuns The Eyes tough guy Helo. Vulnerable and alone Helo feels the pain of a second chainsaw to the chest and passes out from the pain and is removed to the Ko'd section of the dugout. Scrambling for position The Eye look to enact revenge on the saws for Helo's departure but can only stun Fkor but appear to have once again forgotten to pressure the ball.
Then a break for The Eye Redwing successfully tackles Vrygaar and they are once again on the front foot. Redwing full of confidence breaks forward and knocks out Blackwart with his own chainsaw and the Red Devil stuns Jixx. However that confidence appears misplaced when the long arms of the Troll Yaragan trip a fleeing Razor and the Gobbos can look to rally behind this play. Running around the ankles of their opponents Himmolett and Vrygaar runs through providing a screen for the bouncy Kazaboubou to boing into, leaping over Starbuck leaving her grasping at air he flees down the pitch leaving them in a great position to take first blood. Despite Dasaklas taking five minutes out to try and remember his name The Eye are unable to regain field position or do any real damage and The Wild Bunch look set to score but the crowd old their breath as Fkor and Razor wrestle with his chainsaw but the experience of the Gobbo with his saw proves too much and Razor can only lie stunned on the floor as Kazaboubou send the crowd wild with a successful bounce into the end zone as Starbuck is once again left grasping at air.
Following the score despite being banned the Gobbos successful retain the services of two of their secret weapons as the ref drives off leaving a trail of coin and angry humans behind him. A quick snap for The Eye means that they look to run in the quick return score and Ricky Two times secures the ball to that end. Concentrating on the return score the Humans fail to protect blitzer Apollo and Blackwarts saw sends him to join his team mate in the KO'd box. Angered that a player who shouldn't even be on the pitch has injured her friend Starbuck leaps through the air planting an elbow firmly upon the head of Blackwart and he is stretchered off to the cheers of the fans who have by now given up the chase on the now absent referee. Looking like they might be in trouble the Wild bunch go their wild fanatic Loukanikouba who swings with precision busting open the human’s cage and taking down the ball carrier in the process and the Gobbos look to have stopped the Humans drive. That is except for the fact that Showboat is now vexed and looking for blood, a with kick to head sees Loukanikouba fall lifeless to the ground leaving only a pool of blood by which to remember him however as the apothecary works is magic in dugout it looks like he might be back for the second half.
As the half draws to an end the Gobbos look to stop the score starting with Yatagan swing is substantial troll arm at Razor who having spent most of the game stunned on the floor finds himself with a broken collar bone and wonders if the red jersey he had passed to him at the beginning of the game had anything to do with his downfall there will be no more action for him and retirement seems likely as there is no room for the weak in this league and Razor is no exception. Just as the humans draw breath to attempt to move the ball about 65 yards down the pitch in a single down a dark cloud falls over Starbuck's head and a swift bolt of lightning sees her carried off the pitch, she'll live to fight another day but her involvement in this game is at an end. In range and made free by the support of his team mates Narcho waits for the Two Times to do his stuff and get him the ball so that he can sprint in for the score but after losing his footing trying to shorten the range of the pass even his experience throwing ability can't help him as he fumble the ball and the half finishes with a whimper and disappointment for the Eye who had sacrificed 3 of their star players only for two times to be true to his name, unfortunately in this instance he was a two times failure.

Second Half
As they line up for the second half the referee's seems somewhat slower than in the first half maybe in part to his bulging pockets as suspiciously Lukanikouba takes the pitch for the second half fully recovered from his first half injury. The Eye not trusting Two Times once again drop back using Star show boat to pick up a long kick whilst the weakened front line sweeps left but the Gobbos react and Vrygaar runs headfirst into the testis of Hardball leaving him squirming on the floor. Looking to secure their position Helo finally remembers his job and punches Jixx into the middle of next week and Ricky Two Times finally does something useful sending the ball and chain once again to the dugout, looks like the Apo patched him up but not quite well enough, hey at least he's not dead!
Finally remembering why they are there The Eye move Showboat down the pitch looking to move into position for the score, but just as thing look like they are going their way Yatagan once again pulls out a big punch sending tough guy Helo back to the Ko'd box leaving the game in the hands of the lineman as Apollo also finds himself on the floor and out of position. Buoyed by this big hit the Gobbos scramble back looking to stop the score although they will have to hold out for the entire second period of the second half. Then a moment of madness sees Showboat streak through the opposition front line but without any support to protect her. sensing this could be their moment the Wild Bunch start swing and the mighty Dasaklas sends Apollo staggering to the floor and the reaming team members surround Showboat but are unable to bring her down. Whilst her team mates flood in to support her Showboat once again feels a rush of blood to the head and attempts to break for the end zone but a last ditch diving tackle from Roulas sees her fall shame ridden to floor stunned by her own ineptitude the ball is now loose and anything could happen and does the Wild bunch look to secure the victory but Savra fails to pick up the ball and the score is once again on.
Picking himself up off the floor Apollo fails to ear the coaches instructions and blitzes Karabin and send him face first into the mud and off the pitch not to return. Unable to pick the ball up due to Apollo's hot hotheadedness it is left to Hardball to pressure it in the hope that it remains on the floor long enough for support to arrive. It is at this point the Wild Bunch go to a special play and look to launch Niklas into the fray however it appears Yatagan has misread the playbook and decides now would be a good time for a snack, Alas poor Niklas is now just lunch. Dragged to the floor Vrygaar Hardball is down but not out and the ball still lies waiting for someone to take it home. Showboat picks herself up of the floor successfully scoops up the ball and surely nothing can stop the score and a share of the points for The Eye.
The Wild bunch appears tired and now there is little left for the humans to do but move their cage out of the way and run the ball in. However the colossal Douche Hardball runs off back down the pitch tripping over his own fat feet and losing the game in a match that The Eye will look to forget and which will surely rally the Wild Bunch to greater things. The moral of this story is never underestimate an opponent no matter how small they are and never trust an idiot to do the right thing and just move if Hardball survives to play again you can be sure he will not be a popular man amongst the fans.
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