“Grotty Little Tournament X - Old Teams Qualifier I: Round Two

"Tonight, a comedian died in New York. Somebody knows why... somebody knows." -Rorschach

From the outset, this was going to be a match for the ages. Lone Stars entered the match with the vastly superior coach, while Watchmen Philosophy had built an army of killers that were complemented well by unique players.

The opening coin toss saw luck favor the Lone Stars, as they chose to receive the ball and begin a slow grind up field. While Watchmen Philosophy had their killers in tow, Coach Qaz did an excellent job of protecting Aron - a chaos warrior who would prove to be the thorn in the side of the Watchmen all match long.

The Lone Stars moved steadily up the left flank, with the behemoth Dermatalog holding the sideline and providing multiple opportunities to surf the defenders into the crowd. Some they treated gently, others - like Big Figure - they tore into with relish. Sansou passed into the Watchmen backfield in turn 6 with relative ease, as all but five of the Watchmen had been removed from the field.

Turn 7 was a devastating one for the Watchmen. The Comedian, who had previously been given a healing potion, was ripped apart by the claws of Aron, Lone Stars' deadly warrior. The Watchmen were throwing everything they had at the Lone Stars, but there was little joy to be found as Sansou walked into the endzone in turn 8.

Watchmen Philosophy 0, Lone Stars 1.

The second half began with Watchmen Philosophy outnumbered 10 players to 11. Immediately after the kickoff, those numbers were reduced so that the Watchmen held a one player advantage. This advantage went back and forth as each team whittled down the numbers for the other. In turn 1, Coach Qaz used up his last apothecary, keeping Dark Star in the match on a knockout for some added muscle.

Turn 2 saw the team wizard of the Lone Stars rain down fire and lightning on Ozymandias, popping the ball free in the process. As Nite Owl was blitzed clear of the ball, Sansou again proved his worth to the Lone Stars by dodging in and picking it up, crouching behind a sideline cage. Rorschach moved in and wrapped his tentacles around Sansou, but Dermatolog was once again the team's savior. He blitzed Rorschach free from Sansou, allowing the crafty beastman to retreat further into the backfield and taunt the Watchmen heroes from a distance.

The defense was not entirely secure, however, and Hollis Mason managed to sneak in a blitz. Nuffle kept Sansou and the ball safe on that one, as only pushes were to be found. Hollis Mason did managed to remain in contact with Sansou, forcing him to the left flank. With Aron clearing the way, Sansou went for a 3+ dodge to sprint to freedom. With no rerolls left in the turn, he came crashing down to earth, deserted by Nuffle. Captain Metropolis made a noble effort at picking up the ball, but it wasn't until turn 6 that Ozymandias was able to secure it for the Watchmen. That same turn saw Hollis Mason send Dermatolog to the apothecary's to be tended to. He would not return to the match.

On turn eight, after some questionable blocking, Ozymandias brought the ball across the touch line and scored the first goal of the match for the Watchmen.

Watchmen Philosophy 1, Lone Stars 1.

Overtime came and every single knocked out player from the Lone Stars rose from their beds, shook it off and rejoined the fight. Dollar Bill of Watchmen Philosophy opted to snooze a little longer, insisting they could carry on without him.

The Lone Stars began overtime with a man advantage and Watchmen Philosophy were left with a huge question as to who should be put on the defensive lines. In the end, Ozymandias was sacrificed to Aron -- who took full advantage and dropped him in the KO box for the remainder of the match.

Nine against ten, then eight against ten, then seven, then six... Watchmen Philosophy could not sustain this pace and hope to prevail. They began to strike back at the Lone Stars, knocking out one, then another and then still another. As the totals for each team began to even out, Sansou the ballcarrier drew nigh to the goal line. Aron stood in front of him, preventing Hollis Mason from easily reaching him. It was clear that if Hollis Mason blitzed Sansou, Aron would immediately retaliate and Sansou would have the ball easily for a touchdown.

So instead, Mothman was brought to bear. Dodging free from the tentacles of Dark Star, Mothman blitzed Sansou and knocked him to the turf, freeing the ball. Hollis Mason followed with a block that sent Aron down the ground as well, leaving the ball as well protected as could be hoped for. Turn 5 of overtime saw both Rorschach and Nite Owl bury two of the Lone Stars near midfield, followed by Hollis Mason making a miracle of a pickup with no rerolls left.

Sansou continued in pursuit, but fell short as he attempted to blitz Hollis Mason. Not to be deterred though, he leapt to his feet in the following turn and got in position to force a dodge from Hollis Mason. The dodge went well, but Hollis Mason fell along the sideline as he was pushing himself into overdrive.

At that point, Qaz could've played for the coin toss. But fortunately, neither coach had a coin toss in mind. Dark Star moved in for an attempt at a long pass that would give the Lone Stars a shot. The pickup failed and hope rose among the gathered Watchmen fans.

Hollis Mason rose to the occasion. He leapt to his feet and blitzed Dark Star away from the ball, stunning him in the process. Then, with a grace befitting a wood elf, he scooped up the ball and made a mad dash for the endzone.

One go-for-it, two go-for-its... touchdown!

Final Score: Watchmen Philosophy 2, Lone Stars 1.

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Thanks for an incredible game, Qaz. I felt certain near the end there that I was done for, but I'm glad I finally had an opportunity to play you in a major. I'll try to do you proud against Pete, but anytime he has wood elves I'm nervous.








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