“Well, another thoroughly inept display, with a representative score. That said, a probabilistic anomaly early in the first half resulted in the Undead having the option of scoring. I anticipated this would probably just lead to the light-averse elves scoring back very easily and a likely 2-1 defeat, so had a go at stalling, which did not go entirely according to plan and resulted in the team being 1-0 down at half time.

Come the second half the Undead had been comprehensively duffed over by the ferocious bashing power of the Elves, and it was mainly just a case of the depleted team standing around watching the other team run past them with the ball a couple of times. But at least no-one ended the match any more dead than they'd started it. ”