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EPIC TUSSLE ENDS IN A TIE

A run of 4 defeats marked Coach Wilson's longest losing streak at the helm of the Unicorns. Pundits might argue that the gut-wrenching defeat to the Universe and rolling over against the Cascade to protect a depleted squad deserve less attention but the statistics rarely lie. The knives were metaphorically - and quite literally in the case of the Übersreik Ultras in the corner stand - out for the rookie manager.

The 'Bolts had already gone through their own rough patch of 4 straight losses and were missing 4 players after a bruising encounter against the Universe. But their record this season and Coach Seventyone's vast experience suggested that any prediction about the match would be foolish.

The away team received kick-off and Logan Woodside scooped it up only to watch helplessly as Keith Loneker blitzed Bruno Giza. The big Tilean shook it off and his partner in crime, Rafa Brigante delivered swift vengeance on one of the mercenaries hired to fill the missing players' boots. Tytus Howard then knocked out Ottmar Wirt and Loneker managed to heave Giza over the hoardings as a real scrum developed on the left flank. Leboucher took a hit into the front row from Scott Quessenberry, that required the smelling salts, but just before, two vital hits gave the away team a massive advantage; Carlos Torrosa killed rookie Simon Demain and Barry Gryson blitzed Jamal Adams, the Thunderbolts primary scoring threat. In disarray, the Thunderbolts were unable to prevent Woodside from prancing through to complete the perfect kick-off return and open the scoring.

The half was seen out by some uncharacteristically clumsy handling from Saraiva Sardinias and Brock Osweiler.

Howard managed to further injure Ola Adeniyi, whose main role since his transfer appears to be a punching bag for opposing ogres, before a series of punches filled both teams dugouts; Leboucher k/o'd Jonah Berch, Venn Biter k/o'd Zachary Blaide, and then Leboucher and Juan Thornhill k/o'd one mercenary each. However, Sardinias pulled off an elf-like dodge and pass to enable Brady Doshack to equalise.

The Unicorns new strategy appeared to be working as they resumed with a man advantage. Ottmar Wirt found Giza with a wonderful pass but, with little protection to help him manage the clock, he had to race away from the defense to give the visitors the lead again.

From the restart, Loneker, who was proving to be a real thorn in the side of the Übersreik team, surfed Isaiah Blaide to even the numbers somewhat. That, in part, allowed Doshack to dodge out of the grasp of the Unicorns defense, Osweiler to do the same and to then complete a perfect pass into the waiting hands of his teammate just before the buzzer. Had Giza thought to be one pace closer, the whole move may well have failed.

At 2-2, the entertainment seemed over, but the Unicorns desperately needed to keep their irate fans happy. Understanding their missions, Giza tried to make up for his error in allowing the 'Bolts to equalise by making a bee line for Loneker; a perfectly executed drop-kick sent the Altdorf man to the Apothecary and on the injury list for the next game. Brigante then ordered his team mates to form a cage, where he whaled on one of the mercs, seriously injuring him with his studded boots. The referee spotted the foul and sent both him and the furious Coach Wilson to the stands before calling time. Wilson's smirk to the Ultras suggested that he felt he had done enough to win over their support or, at least, buy himself enough time to see out the season.”