| Poll |
| KPL |
| Oh, yeah, Iam in. |
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46% |
[ 70 ] |
| Iam outta here |
|
17% |
[ 26 ] |
| PIE: is this a pointless poll or what? |
|
36% |
[ 54 ] |
|
| Total Votes : 150 |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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 Posted:
Feb 29, 2016 - 19:31 |
 
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Coach stands at the top of the dug out, looks up a the score board, spits out a stream of tobacco juice and goes into a profanity laced tirade at his players as they come off the pitch at the end of over time and blowing what looked like a easy win.
The fans in the stands above the Dune Raiders dug out are giving the team every thing they got. Beer cans, beer bottles, a few bottles of whiskey, some half eaten hotdogs, three leg bones, a skull and one french tickler all get thrown at the team as they run into the shelter of the dug out, not sure if they are more scared of coach or the enraged fans.
Coach stands there, with his back turned to the enraged fans, the fans are just giving coach a mouth full.
"PainState, YOU SUCK!!!"
"I see you are a legend at LOSING!!!!"
"That is what you get coach for drafting that bomber and not a real player!!!"
"PainState is a choke artist of the highest order!!"
"PainState you *&^%#@^# # #&^@%#%# *#&#@@@ *#$*#^&#^@#^@ !!!!"
Coach turns to the fans, spits a wad of tobacco juice at them, that gets them really going. He walks slowly into the locker room.
2 minutes later the fans are sulking away from the dug out as they hear coach ripping the team a new one and they are deathly afraid he might come back out and go into the stands to teach them a lesson or two also.
Dune Raiders go down in Over Time in what might be just the most whacky KPL games ever. Watch this replay if you want to see one of the most awesome KPL games ever played. At least in the humble opinion of myself and WhatBall. |
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WhatBall
Joined: Aug 21, 2008
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| Posted:
Feb 29, 2016 - 19:44 |
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I don't know how I hadn't won that game easily after the first half.
I don't know how I didn't lose the game easily after the second half.
a wild, wild game. |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Mar 02, 2016 - 04:56 |
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Tomb King Settra sits on his golden throne. The Throne room is dark, only the torch light from the front doors glow into the room, shadows bounce off him. The shadows bounce to and fro, reflecting his shattered soul, the rage, the hate, the spite are contrasted by his love, his passion and his desires.
He sits on the throne, spinning his two handed sword, tip down, against the ground, waiting for something to enter his throne room.
Rah-ma stands by his side in the darkness, the shadows reflecting off his face, reflecting off his soul, he senses the chaos in his King. He offers a prayer to the old Gods and NUFFLE to guide the hand of his King and to calm his own soul.
Something approaches, determined and focused. Something approaches...... |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Mar 12, 2016 - 19:01 |
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Time to hand out some goodies
Rah-ma has declared that the following teams will now be issued relics that have been stacking up in his office.
Rah-ma has assigned the relics based on their might and power, he ranked them this way.
#1 Chainsaw
#2 Stab/Stakes
#3 Stab
#4 Ball and Chain
Here is who gets what.
KFC conference
Quatar Brutal Battlers: Chainsaw
Zandri Malevolence: Chainsaw
Rasettra Epicurean Club: Stab
Squashers were Disqualified from getting a relic due to be offlint 19 days.
NFC conference
Lahmia Sand Sailors: Chainsaw
Aswad-Malika Temptresses: Stab/Stakes
Mahrak Warrior Priests: Ball and Chain
Khemri Crimson Haboob: Ball and Chain
Angmarred was Disqualified due to being offline 18 days.
BoneShakers did not get a Ball and Chain because they all ready have one.
Here is what you need to do
#1 if you do not want a relic let me know so I can hand it out again.
#2 you need to contact WhatBall on which player gets the relic
#3 Iam going to make a big assumtion. Coaches want relics, so, I will be making the relic rolls for all the players at 23:00 BB time today in the fumbblminors chat room.
#4 IF a relic is stolen or kills the wielder OR you take the item but then after the relic roll elect not to take it. Those relics go back to Rah-Ma's office and I will hand them out after week #9 |
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WhatBall
Joined: Aug 21, 2008
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| Posted:
Mar 12, 2016 - 19:33 |
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Still a spot in the North American conference open. Now is your chance to join a crazy fun league. |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Mar 12, 2016 - 23:38 |
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Here are the results of the relic rolls.
KFC
Battlers: Chainsaw (7) Harmony
Malevolence: Chainsaw (4) Very Long Legs and Leap
Epicurean Club: Stab (5) Loner
NFC
Sailors: Chainsaw ( S. Weapon
Temptresses: Stab/Stakes (4) +AV
Warrior Priests: Ball/chain (10) Mighty Blow and Block
Haboob: Ball/chain ( S. Weapon
WhatBall will now add the relics to each teams roster as he sees fit. |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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| Posted:
Jun 11, 2016 - 01:28 |
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paradocks
Joined: Jun 14, 2004
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| Posted:
Jun 11, 2016 - 02:15 |
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A tall dark figure sits alone in dark recesses of a rancid cave. Remnants of bone and hair litter the area where he sits, tending to his steaming cauldron.
"Worry not my dark ones... we haven't forgotten this cheaty commissioner, HE DISGRACED YOU, disgrace us he attempted to do so, but we'll show him.. won't we? oh how he lies.. how the cheaty one lies. YOU MUST DESTROY HIM, oh we's will master. I will show you. We will show all them cheaty officials..." |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Jun 27, 2016 - 23:32 |
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Rah-ma enters the sanctuary of NUFFLE. He pulls out the holy text of NUFFLE, reading, contemplating its words of wisdom, reflecting and praying for salvation from his undeath.
As Rah-ma is in deep contemplation his world spins, he senses that NUFFLE is taking him to a place, forbidden and long in the past.
Rah-ma is at a cross roads deep in the desert, far to the East. He looks around and remembers this place from history but he cannot remember its significance. The cross roads lead north, to the black mountains the other road leads to Lahmia.
He looks up and there is a sentinel at the cross roads. A crucified skeleton with arms out stretched pointing to both roads. Both arms and legs are staked by warpstone stakes and a large spike of warpstone is impaled through the chest and strongly fixes the skeleton to the upright post of the crucifix.
Rah-ma looks upon the skeleton sentinel, thinking to himself, who would do such a thing, warpstone, that is the key to this mystery.
He senses a presence behind him, he already knows who it is, he turns and nods to his king.
Tomb King Settra, lord of all undeath and ruler of the lands of the dead stands beside Rah-ma, looking upon the skeleton crucified at the cross roads. Rah-ma can sense deep emotion from his King, emotions he has never felt before.
“Be hold Ra-ma the root of my hate, spite and rage. NUFFLE has guided us back to when it started, the down fall of my fathers kingdom and the place that I died.
10 feet from here is where I was killed. Attempting to stop Nagash from destroying all hope in Khemri and sending the lands into darkness. This was the only time I failed and I will never fail again.
My sister Rah-Suna was to marry the prince of Lybaras, Prince Ahmad-Kalar. I meet him many times and I will admit he was touched by the Gods. His mastery of engineer and machinery was considered the pinnacle of priest of the old Gods. They married and over time my sister became a priestess of the machine God. She too had a affinity for the Machine God. She rose in power and soon became the high Priestess of their cult. She had 3 sons and 2 daughters. My father was so proud of her and so was I. She was a shining example of our house and inspired the common folk, she was beloved and beautiful.
Then the dark times came, Nagah. My sister was touched by the old Gods. Nagash had plans to make an example out of her. Perform a dark ritual that would fuel his power to destroy all of Khemri.
I was on the field of battle far to the south in Ka-Sabar leading our forces against Nagash when I heard my sister had been kidnapped by Nagash. I rode forth with my ten best men to rescue her, far to the East, we never stopped, our mounts dropping every 12 hours, I would not be denied. 2 Days later we arrived at this spot.
I crested that dune behind us. Nagash had already impaled my sisters body on the cross. She cried in pain and suffering but I could sense her spirit of resistance, she was not going to give in.
I cried out to my sister and challenged Nagash. He laughed at me and Arkhan the Black and 20 wights stood between me and my sister. My men and I drew our swords, prepared to end this once and for all.
Nagash pulled out a shard of warpstome that shone brighter than the sun and impaled my sister through her heart. He called upon the dark Gods and then the sun went dark an eclipse happened. I then knew that our world was lost. Once my sister was impaled the Old Gods were banished from this world. Their guidance, wisdom and protection was forever banished.
I raised my sword and charged, I would avenge my sister, my father, my house and the old Gods. I would not let Nagash win the day.
I fought for my life, fought harder than I have ever fought. I met Arkhan the black, blade to blade, he was no match. I raised my sword for the killing blow and then I felt blades puncture my armor, stroke after stroke. The Old Gods who had infused my armor to any mortal blade had faded away, the old Gods had vanished.
I recoiled to stave off the wights, I looked around and all my men were dead. Killed by the wights blades, their bodies already starting to twitch and come back to life in undeath. I stood my ground, gave a war cry and charged in a final act of defiance. It was there Rah-ma that my body laid, by that rock, my head laid next to it as my last heart beat sounded.â€
Rah-ma and Settra stand at the cross roads in silence, time stands still for a long time.
“Look Rah-ma upon the warpstone spikes. Their power is starting to fade. I can sense my sister still fighting on the other side. The Old Gods are still there, stirring, waiting, patient and ready to remerge. The awakening in the land of the S. League teams is a sign. The Old Gods are returning and so is my sister. We must now choose which path to take. “
Rah-ma awakens in the temple of NUFFLE. He stands up and collects himself. He looks down to the tome of NUFFLE to pick it up. The pages are turned to a very specific section of the rule book. He picks it up and starts to read. Wisdom from NUFFLE is imparted to Rah-ma on what must be done. He closes the tome and heads with all haste to the throne room of Settra. |
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Comish of the:
Last edited by PainState on %b %28, %2016 - %03:%Jun; edited 1 time in total |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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| Posted:
Jun 28, 2016 - 02:10 |
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NOBNIBBLERS!!!! |
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Antithesisoftime
Joined: Aug 20, 2014
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| Posted:
Jun 28, 2016 - 03:39 |
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| pythrr wrote: | | NOBNIBBLERS!!!! |
Filthy lucker team.
Only reason you're in the playoffs at all, you got lucky against the Life Drinkers. It shall not happen again, especially considering how little MB you have left.
Don't worry, my vamps will make sure that you're a one and done playoff team this season, ya filthy lucker! |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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| Posted:
Jul 08, 2016 - 05:20 |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Sep 16, 2016 - 20:09 |
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KPL season #7 is getting ready to kick off
KPL has converted to S. League rosters that are customized for the KPL.
Check out the rosters of KPL teams.
As of right now Zandri,Numas and RaSettra are set. The other rosters will be finalized very shortly.
7 unique new undead rosters will be battling it out in the Lands of the Dead. Battling their way to the top of the league for domination, glory, fame and immortality.
KPL Home Page
The KPL home page is getting set for a complete overhaul with this awesome league conversion, that will happen shortly. Although if you are interested in joining the KPL for season #7 and give it a read. It will give you some back ground and so forth on the league and what to expect.
The #1 reason to join KPL, beside the awesome new teams.
KPL is a dual conference league. You can join the Euro group or the North America group. That way you do not have to worry about playing coaches from across the "pond" in less you make it to the KPL championship match.
So stay tuned for updates and so forth. KPL will be kicking off shortly. |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Sep 16, 2016 - 21:50 |
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There are 7 rosters: Khemri, Numas, Rasetra, Zandri, Lybaras, Lahmia and Necarch.
Those teams are broken down by faction of the KPL. The three factions are Setra, who focuses on strength, The Prophet who has mutation access and Nagash who focuses on agility and the strange.
Each team has 3 variants based on this faction. There are 3 unique players on each roster devoted to faction that you can purchase.
So, KPL has 21 teams you can choose from.
Also each roster that does not have a S. Weapon on the roster will have a unique S. Weapon player on their roster. So, all teams in the KPL will have a S. weapon or two. We will use the stunty send off rules for the S. Weapons.
Check out the rosters of KPL teams. |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Sep 16, 2016 - 23:19 |
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The Khemri Roster has been finished. Check it out and see the variant rosters and the epic BONE CRUSHER!!!! |
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Gnomes are trash
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