A Gobbos Tale -- Part 1
This is a tale of a time long ago, before BloodBowl fell into oblivion, a
tale about a little goblins amazing career. All characters and events in this
story are totally fictious and any similarities to real life and/or FUMBBL
characters are totally unintended. Furthermore the author admits that the
abilities of some characters in this story may not be consist with any
of the official or unofficial BloodBowl rules known - this is just a story!,
Our tale starts back in the old days when BloodBowl had already risen and was
a source of fun and entertainment for the whole family. BloodBowl teams toured all over the old world and challenged
the local players, many villages built stadiums so they could sell tickets for
these events and of course some resourceful people recognized the opportunity
they were given and started small shops or restaurants near these stadiums. So
did G'ark Ton'k, a lifelong member of a little nameless orcish town. G'ark made
lots of money selling food and "special services" to the players, their fans
and their staff. G'ark employed several citizens, one of them was a little goblin
called Gnot. One day "Da Deadly Raiderzzz" came to town, a team that has
been well known amongst the BloodBowl fans for their fast, precise and hard
play, after they won their match by crushing the resident team, they came
to the tavern to celebrate their victory, where little Gnot happend to be
scheduled for their service.
The victory celebration started off normally, like every after match
party Gnot got before, the players drank, ate and called for their groupies,
then they drank some more, ate some more and called even louder for their
groupies. Soon they started smashing the chattels and got more and more
As Gnot came to their table, serving the 9th tray of Clay jars filled with moonshine, Gnarshik
and Tsork, two of the teams meanest players started to hurl the clay jars at Gnot, just for the fun of it. At first they enjoyed Gnot dodging
their attacks and the rest of the team began to laugh and urge them on, but as
they could not hit the dodgy little git with the clay missiles they soon got angry at Gnot.
Tsork jumped up and tried to give Gnot his best block, but since he
was a little too drunk his attack was not as quick as it was on the pitch. Gnot
could step aside without being smashed. Quickly Gnarshik was after him to give him
a straight pummel to the head. Gnot dodged his fist in the very last second and
Gnarshiks hand crushed another table. Now the team encouraged the little
goblin, because they where deeply impressed that this little goblin took on two opponents that were both double his size instead of running away.
In fact Gnot was just to petrified to think about fleeing but the orcs
did not notice. All of a sudden an old and ugly orc in the back of the
room and spoke. "Noreg, help him!"
A huge ogre rose from his chair, walked
towards the three fighters and placed himself between the goblin and his
two tormentors, who instantly ceased their attacks as they recognized their
"I'm G'morg, da fab'lous. Coach and man'ga of Da Deadly Raiderzzz. Uh arr quick my lil'
friend and fearless, i like dat." The old orc kindly said.
Gnot didn't get what that fat and ugly guy
was talking about, he was still triying not to collapse due to the stress he was
been exposed to.
"How 'bout, uh join us?" offered G'morg after farting louder
than anyone could possibly imagine.
"Me... me just serv'n beer and food, no
play da ball." The little goblin countered.
As he turned to leave, G'morg
continued "Uh, godda becom' a sta'".
"Me havink to go... Master callin'" Gnot
stammered as he hurried back to bar, never would he go on a pitch to get
himself crippled, especially when even his socalled teammates would try to
tear him apart, never. He left the bar room, he needed some fresh air.
His little body shivered as he sat on the backstairs of the tavern and heard the
hard footsteps of his boss coming nearer. He silently prayed to Morg to make
his boss not shout at him and call him lazy good for nothing and curse him
and all his descendants like he used to do when Gnot did something wrong
or he was in a bad moot. The steps stopped right behind Gnot and he prepared
to encounter a very angry orc as he turned his head around but all he saw was
the opening of a huge bag. Quickly Gnot found himself inside the bag.
"Iiiieeeek.....!!! Wha'cha doink... letting oudda 'ere....!!!" Gnot began to
screamed but he was instantly silenced as he got pounded on the wall.
"Dey wnt'cha, dey get'cha.. paying good for lousy git, hehe," a sinister voice explained.
From this moment Gnot knew that
he had no chance to escape the awful orcs and tried to imagine how they are
going to torture him before he finally died.
-- To be continued... --