Ahoy thar' me hearties!!!
This be Cap'n Neri, ye may recall me from th' Sartosa Shipwrecks 'n Grind League.
I be a Blood Bowl coach, 'n player in th' Blood Bowl high seas, fer an age, but with th' slow degeneration o' players, mind bogglin' rules, th' mess made by th' higher ups, that thar' game by that death pill company 'n all else I not be havin' a hand in.
Now, I be leadin' ye no good sons o' goats t' make, from th' safety o' ye land lubbin' FUMBBL, what I be callin' "Pirate Blood Bowl First Edition". (I be sure th' scallywag who be comin' up with th' game will be givin' me th' go ahead, especially as I be holdin' his wife 'n his children fer ransom).
Th' core o' me rules will go beyond what ye mere milk maids can be comprehendin', but it'll be th' best damn rules ye ever be seein'. (I be a harsh critic o' the Man, even if he be havin' a sharp idea from time t' time).
Ye lily livered scallywags may say what right does that thar' fine lookin' 'n fearsome Cap'n have t' write up his own set o' rules when we be havin' our own set o' mighty fine rules. I be sayin' t' this "Shut ye pipehole before I be wrestlin' ye t' th' ground and dunkin' me bloated nuts int' ye gawpin' mouth, I be doin' this t' bring this here FUMBBL out o' Davey Jones locker as we all be knowin' 'tis a dead site".
Th' theme o' th' rules be set in th' Warhammer World in th' distant future. Th' polar ice caps be meltin' 'n th' world be covered in water, like in that thar' Kevin Costners greatest ever film, no not th' one where he be dancin' with wolves ye hook handed bilge swillers. Blood Bowl still be happenin', but all games be played on large floatin' rafts. Th' games be much more bloody 'n dangerous bein' as sharks be prowlin' th' waters around ye, 'n if ye be caught in a storm th' whole pitch could end up bein' ripped apart.
I sharted out this here new system while I be sittin' on th' privy last evenin'. So any o' ye who wish t' question th' wisdom o' me decisions will be gettin' thread banned by th' admins. I will be usin' th' power o' Calypso t' create me a new client out o' thin air. 'n if Christer be gettin' in me way I will be bringin' me broadsides t' bear on him.
Pirate Blood Bowl First Edition
Here be th' rules.
Pirate Blood Bowl be played on a floatin' raft made t' th' size o' Blood Bowl pitches o' old. Fans be watchin' th' game from ships anchored a slight distance off o' th' side o' th' pitch, with many o' th' fans clingin' t' th' riggin' 'n crowdin' int' th' crows nests.
Afore Match Sequence
Afore th' game ye must be sendin' a crew member int' th' crows nest t' test how th' weather be. Make ye a roll on this here table.
Transfer booty from ye Treasury
|2||Sweltering Heat||It be so damn hot 'n humid that some o' ye players be lolligagin' around from heat exhaustion. Roll a D6 fer each member o' th' crew on th' pitch at th' end o' a drive. On a roll o' 1 the crew member collapses 'n may not be set up fer th' next kick-off.|
|3||Very Sunny||It be a glorious day, but th' blindin' sunshine be causin' a -1 modifier on all o' them thar' passin' rolls.|
|4-10||Becalmed||It be fine weather fer Blood Bowl.|
|11||Pourin' Rain||It be rainin', makin' th' ball slippery 'n right hard t' hold. A -1 modifier be applied t' all catch, intercept, or pick-up rolls.|
|12||Perfect Storm||All o' ye players must be makin' an agility roll t' keep thar' feet 'n a strength roll t' hold thar' postion. Any crew member that be failin' thar' agility roll must be placed prone. Any crew member that be failin' thar' strength roll will move 1D6 squares towards th' nearest side, roll on th' overboard table fer any crew members off th' side o' th' pitch. No balls may be thrown durin' th' perfect storm 'n th' ball will move 1D6 squares in a random direction if it be loose.|
Next some Cap'ns be changin' some o' thar' hard earned booty int' pieces o' eight. These here pieces o' eight be used t' smuggle in some contraband t' give thar' team 'n edge. Th' crew that be havin' th' highest Crew Value must be changin' up thar' booty first.
Crews that be at a disadvantage be often given ‘contraband’ t' help even th' odds.
T' represent this, th' underdog in th' match be given some extra pieces o' eight that they can be usin' t' smuggle in items fer thar' crew t' help them. Th' amount o' pieces o' eight ye crew be gettin' be equal t' th' difference 'tween th' crew value o' th' underdogs 'n th' crew value o' th' opposin' crew.
Any pieces o' eight not spent on Contraband be lost. Crews may be usin' pieces o' eight that they be changin' up from thar' booty t' buy more o' that thar' Contraband. Th' superior crew must be purchasin' contraband with thar' pieces o' eight from thar' own booty, they must be doin' so afore th' underdog be purchasin' any o' thar' contraband.
Contraband be selected from this here list:
• Barrels o' Grog (0-2) - 50,000 pieces o' eight - Ye purchase ye crew a barrel o' Rum fer 50,000 pieces o' eight, fer each purchase o' this here contraband, crew members be gettin' a +1 modifier t' recover from KO’d fer this here match.
• Lifebuoy (0-2) - 50,000 pieces o' eight - Each Lifebuoy be costin' ye 50,000 pieces o' eight 'n it be allowin' ye t' attempt t' ignore a roll t' save a crew member that be in Deep Water (See Overboard Table). Make ye a roll o' a D6: if ye be rollin' a 2-6 the lifebuoy be effective (preventin' ye crew member from drownin'), but if ye be rollin' a 1 th' lifebuoy be wasted 'n th' crew member be dragged down t' his doom! Each o' these here lifebuoys may be used once per match.
• Shark Bait (0-2) - 100,000 pieces o' eight - Each Shark Bait be costin' ye 100,000 pieces o' eight 'n it be allowin' ye t' attempt t' ignore a roll t' save a crew member sufferin' a Shark Attack (See Overboard Table). Make ye a roll o' a D6: if ye be rollin' a 2-6 the shark bait be effective (lurin' th' sharks away from ye crew member), but if ye be rollin' a 1 th' shark bait be wasted 'n th' crew member be dragged down t' his doom! Each o' these here shark baits may be used once per match.
• Ogre Chef (0-1) - 300,000 pieces o' eight - Ye can be hirin' yeself a Ogre Chef for 300,000 pieces o' eight. Roll ye 3D6 at th' start o' each half t' see what ye chef’s cooking be doin'. Fer each o' ye dice that be rollin' 4 or more, ye crew be so inspired that they be takin' th' opposin' crews Re-rolls fer themselves (only if they be havin' any left t' lose mind).
• Freebooter (Unlimited) - Various prices - Fer every crew member safely employed by ye thar' be dozens o' freebooters who be willin' t' play one game with a crew afore they be movin' on. A Freebooter be costin' 30,000 pieces o' eight more than ye crew member. All Freebooters be havin' th' Loner skill as they be unruly 'n oft' none too sober. Also ye may givin' ye Freebooter one additional Normal skill, this be at th' exorbitant cost of 50,000 pieces o' eight. Freebooters cannot be earnin' SPP other than that thar' MVP. Freebooters can never be gainin' new skills.
• Swashbucklers (0-2) - Various prices - Swashbucklers be th' heroes o' th' High Sea 'n th' Blood Bowl arena, they be th' most fearsome 'n cut throat pirates in th' game. Each Swashbuckler be havin' his own set o' special skills 'n each be a law unt' themselves, standin' out from th' rest o' th' pirates in th' league by virtue o' th' unique set o' skills 'n talents that they be havin' (see Swashbucklers). Swashbucklers be actin' as free agents playin' single matches fer any team that can be affordin' thar' outrageously high fees. Ye may be hirin' up t' two Swashbucklers fer ye crew, Swashbucklers be employin' thar' own surgeons t' travel with them t' be healin' them from almost any injury (this be includin' death) 'n will not be usin' ye crews amateur surgeon t' fix them up. As such an injuries they be pickin' up durin' ye game will stand until they be seein' thar' own surgeon afterwards.
• Cannonball (0-1) - 150,000 pieces o' eight - Choose ye a target square anywhere on th' pitch. Roll ye one o' them thar' dice t' hit each standin' player that be either in th' target square or be in a square adjacent t' it. If th' t' hit roll be a 4 or more then th' target be Knocked Down. If it be a 3 or less he be managin' t' dodge th' Cannonball’s blast. Make ye an Armour roll ('n possible Injury as well) fer any crew member that be Knocked Down as if he be Knocked Down by a pirate with th' Mighty Blow skill. If ye be Knockin' ye own crew member Down by th' Cannonball, then ye be not sufferin' a turnover unless ye crew member be havin' th' ball.
• Sniper (0-1) - 150,000 pieces o' eight - Pick ye a standin' pirate anywhere on th' pitch, and roll ye one dice. If th' score be a 2 or higher, then he be hit by the Snipers shot. If th' roll be a 1 then he be managin' t' dodge out o' the way. A pirate that be hit by a Snipers shot be Knocked Down 'n must be makin' an Armour roll ('n possible Injury as well) as if he be hit by a pirate with th' Mighty Blow skill.
All Contraband purchased be lost at th' end o' th' match.
Cap'ns from both crews be tossin' a coin t' see who be kickin' 'n recievin' th' ball. Each crew must be fieldin' 11 players on th' pitch, with th' kickin' team settin' up first. Thar must be no more than 2 crew members in each o' th' widezones 'n thar must be 3 on th' line o' scrimmage.
The Kick Off
All manner o' crap can be goin' on durin' a Pirate Blood Bowl match.
The Kick-Off table be used t' recreate these out o' th' blue events.
After both crews be set up, be followin' this here sequence:
• Place th' ball on th' pitch
• Scatter th' ball t' find out where th' ball be landin'
• Make ye a roll on th' Kick-Off table
• Execute th' Kick-Off table result
• Bounce/catch/or Int' th' blue the ball
Kick Off Table
This here be th' Kick Off Table.
|Kick Off Table|
|2||The Kracken||Th' Kraken appears from th' deep 'n pulls th' pitch 'n all th' crew members on it t' thar' deaths.|
|3||Pirate Attack||A pirate ship attacks th' pitch, roll on th' table below t' see what pirate crew be attackin'.|
|1||Black Bas||Black Bas attacks with his deadly crew o' ne'er do-wells.|
Make an armour 'n injury roll fer all crew members on th' pitch.
|2-5||Th' Sartosa Shipwrecks||Th' crew o' th' Shipwrecks appears 'n cheer on th' blood shed.|
All crew members on th' pitch gain mighty blow 'n dirty player as they try t' impress them.
|6||Ghost Ship||A ghost ship appears off o' th' side o' th' pitch, all crew members are afeared.|
Both teams be losing a turn fer this drive.
|4||Sirens Call||Crew members on th' pitch hear th' Sirens Call, roll fer each player.|
'n on a roll o' 1 that thar' crew member walks int' th' sea never t' be seen again.
|5||Albatross||Both teams lose one o' them thar' rerolls.|
|6||Sea Shanty||Fans start up a sea shanty, both teams roll 1D6 'n be addin' ye FAME t' th' roll.|
Th' team with th' higher roll be gettin' one o' them rerolls.
|7||Changing Weather||Roll on th' weather table|
|8||Rogue Wave||A large wave hits th' pitch knockin' all crew members 1D6 squares t' th' nearest side.|
Roll on th' overboard table fer any players off th' side o' th' pitch.
|9||Gust o' Wind||A gust o' wind blows the ball twice as far as it be normally goin', roll 2D6 fer th' kick.|
|10||Crack o' th' whip||Th' Bosun spurs on th' offensive team, ye can move all o' ye crew members 1 square ignorin' tackle zones|
|11||Boardin' Party||Th' defensive team be ready t' board 'n they be havin' a free turn before th' ball be landin'.|
|12||Giant Octopus||A giant Octopus be waitin' t' drag players t' thar' doom, any crew member on th' sidelines must be makin' a strength roll.|
A failed roll will see that thar' crew member dragged int' th' depths.
When one o' ye crew members be off o' th' pitch fer any reason, make ye a roll on th' Overboard table.
If ye crew member be havin' th' ball they be droppin' it, make ye a scatter roll.
Crew members may be in th' blue fer as long as they be wantin' 'n they can be movin' up 'n down th' side o' the pitch. But they be needin' t' make a roll on th' overboard table fer every turn they be overboard. They can only be movin' 1/3rd o' thar' MA (ye must be roundin' down) 'n it be costin' ye crew member all thar' remainin' MA t' get back on t' th' pitch.
Crew members can jump off o' th' edge o' th' pitch if they be wantin', it be takin' thar' remainin' MA t' do so 'n they must be followin' th' overboard rules that ye just be perusin'.
Int' th' Blue
|1||Shark Attack||Well that be that me laddo, th' sharks be takin' ye man down t' Davey Jones locker.|
|2-3||Deep Water||Ye crew member be in some really choppy water 'n they be needin' t' make a roll t' save themselves.|
Subtract ye ST 'n AG from ye crew members AV this be th' number ye be needin' t' beat with a D6.
If ye be failin' this here dice roll ye player be gettin' dragged beneath th' waves t' thar' sorry end.
|4-6||Wet Behind the Ears||Ye crew member be disappearin' beneath th' waves fer but a second, he be ready t' climb back ont' th' pitch on ye next turn.|
If th' ball be goin' off o' th' side o' th' pitch one o' ye crew members be havin' t' fetch th' ball from th' deep. Move ye a crew member out o' th' side o' th' pitch 'n make ye a pick up roll. Ye be needin' t' make a roll on that thar' Overboard table fer th' crew member while he be in th' blue.
If ye crew member is holdin' th' ball in th' blue he be havin' 2 options,
• option 1 be that he be havin' t' get back ont' th' pitch on ye next turn. Ye cannot be movin' up 'n down th' side o' th' pitch while ye be holdin' th' ball.
• option 2 be that ye crew member can be throwin' th' ball t' a waitin' crew mate, th' throw be sufferin' from a -1 modifier.
If th' ball be goin' Int' th' Blue on a Kick Off, one o' th' recievin' crews crew members be gettin' a free move t' go 'n fetch that thar' ball. That thar' crew member can then be movin' his full MA t'wards th' ball.
Hittin' a man when he be down be a common occurence in th' life o' a Pirate.
So in this here Pirate Blood Bowl thar' be no Referees 'n foulin' be an accepted part o' th' game.
In fact if a crew member fails t' get fouled every turn o' th' game ye could end up with a riot on ye hands.
Fouls be +1 modifier t' th' AV roll 'n a +1 modifier t' th' injury roll.
Th' apothecary be replaced by th' ships surgeon in Pirate Blood Bowl.
Alas he be not so well equipped as th' apothecary 'n not so well schooled.
Crew members can be findin' themselves bein' treated fer injuries that they have yet t' suffer from.
Injury Roll D6:
1-3: Roll on th' injury table again
4: Th' surgeon be worried about a cut on ye hand, he takes a saw t' it replacin' it with a hook (-1AG, Claw & MNG)
5: Th' surgeon notices rot settin' in on one o' ye legs, he takes th' saw t' it, replacin' it with a peg leg (-2MA & MNG)
6: Ye be Dead, head t' Davey Jones locker