“Tottering Hotspurs 1 - 2 PSV Zharr-Naggrund

Well, PSV managed to live up to their promise last night at the Third-Tier Ziggurat stadium. Hotspurs came in favourites with their dashing speed, accurate passing and monsterous blitzer Paul "5-Bellies" Gascoigne giving them options on the ground or in the air. PSV turned up with, well, a hardy blocking line, a bunch of hobgoblins doing Vinnie Jones impressions, and two bull centaurs still puzzling over how to pick the ball up without their hats falling off.

PSV-ZN received, and to much confusion one of their blockers caught the ball! The puzzlement this caused led to fumbles and a general melee in the mid-field, which pretty much played into PSV's hands. Some nifty blocking by Hotspurs nearly recovered the ball for them, but an early use of the wizard freed it so the pushing and shoving could continue. Tottering started to, well, totter as the brutal blocking of the chaos dwarves began to take toll, and "5-Bellies" Gascoigne needed medical help to avoid what could have been a career ending injury. Eventually on of the bull centaurs managed to pick up the ball (despite his hat) and sprint downfield for a touchdown just before the half.

With just enough time in the first half for the kick, PSV blitzed to little effect. Still, Hotspurs achieved little as their SF blitzer Chris Waddle seriously injured himself on a dwarf (presumably he ran into his hat).

The second half began with Hotspurs receiving, though they seemed a bit rattled by the first half, and only push the chaos dwarf team around, rather than playing with proper aggression. PSV, on the other hand, had brought both dirty players onto the field, and had every intention of using them. They seriously injured the Spurs ogre and catcher "Nice Tan" Lineker, but in doing that and protecting against the Hotspurs air game they left the right side of the pitch open for an easy score by Gascoigne.

Now PSV received again, and as they'd noticed that the ref was asleep by the Bloodweiser tent, they just kept fouling while pushing downfield, seriously injurying Glenn Hoddle on the way. A stumble by bull "Ace" Millan kept spurs in the game, but the two bulls linked up again for their trademark dying minutes 'Blitz, pickup, score' to win the game.
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