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Match Result · Blackbox division
Match recorded on 2012-05-01 04:37:48
CTV 1040k Human
1
Winnings 20k
9000 Spectators
+1 Dedicated Fans
Casualties 3/1/0
Wood Elf CTV 1070k
1
70k Winnings
Spectators 9000
Fanfactor +1
0/0/0 Casualties
Player Performances
 
 
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
#2
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
-
6
-
#3
1
-
1
-
1
10
15
-
12
6
-
#4
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
-
3
-
#5
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
-
5
-
#6
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
10
3
-
#7
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
-
3
-
#8
-
-
-
-
-
-
10
-
-
4
-
#9
-
-
1
-
-
2
15
-
-
6
-
#10
-
-
1
-
-
2
10
-
-
1
-
#12
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
-
4
-
#17
-
-
1
-
-
2
15
-
-
2
-
TOTALS
1
-
4
-
1
16
155
-
22
43
-
I would like to point out that by turn 4 of the second, the Terrors' only thoughts were of running in for a quick touchdown for fear of failing yet another "easy" dice roll or block, having burned all 3 team re-rolls by that time.

Gotthard Loerzer, as well, incurred the "joys" of Nuffle's wrath, experiencing his own double skulls blocking a rookie lineelf. A trend that the rest of the Terrors would appear to follow; Skilled wardancer? No problem? Lineelf? Splat.

The Terrors' QB, Ahrend Guerke, showed that errors are not limited to dodging or blocking, having failed to simply pick up the ball then fumbling both a handoff AND a pass.

All in all, a thoroughly enjoyable debacle, a spectacle of fail, played against a coach who took his (and my) misfortunes in well-mannered stride.
Player Performances
 
 
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
#1
1
-
-
-
-
3
14
-
7
9
-
#2
-
-
-
-
-
-
8
-
13
1
-
#8
-
-
-
-
-
-
11
-
-
4
-
#9
-
-
-
-
-
-
13
-
4
3
-
#10
-
-
-
-
-
-
11
-
-
1
-
#11
-
-
-
-
-
-
7
-
-
3
-
#12
-
-
-
-
-
-
11
-
-
2
-
#13
-
-
-
-
-
-
15
-
-
2
-
#14
-
-
-
-
-
-
5
-
-
3
-
#15
-
-
-
-
-
-
7
-
-
2
-
#17
-
-
-
-
1
5
6
-
-
1
-
TOTALS
1
-
-
-
1
8
108
-
24
31
-

#11 No Worries – Smashed Ankle (-MA)
Has there ever been a game with more failing than this game? The first blitz by wardancer Totally Rad was quad skulls to push the Human catcher out of bounds. The humans came back with some fail of their own, and after four turns of double skulls, failed dodges (with dodge) and a general fear of even attempting a single block, the elves managed to punch-drunkenly pick up the ball and stumble to the endzone. It felt like a joke that they would score a touchdown, but make it they did, with two KOs for each side. However, the humans were becoming angry at what they perceived to be the elves taunting them with such horrible play, and promptly killed Totally, Bro with their first block from LOS (apoed to -MA, making him the second permed 0 SPP player on the team). Second half, elves started with 10 players to 11, but by the time turn 3 came they were down to half that, and by turn 6 only two players (one of them stunned, of course) remained on the pitch. Things didn't go much better on their possession, but Totally Rad had a chance to redeem the team with a last minute TD catch... that he dropped. He was then BHed by a blitzing lineman, a fitting end to a sad, sad performance overall for him (he had six dice to push blitzers out of bounds - quad skulls and double both downs). To voice their displeasure, the crowd voted Graham Bluetree, a loner who only made one block and spent most of the game concussed, MVP.

In the end, all I can say is that this team ascended to the very highest acme of fail, turning in one of the very worst performances to ever be recorded in the annals of Blood Bowl. Let this match forever be remembered as one of the most hilarious, ridiculous, wholly amazing matches ever played. As astrosimian noted halfway through, it really should have been scored to the Benny Hill song.
 
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