“NCBB Season 35 Game 2
Conference Game Non-AQ Group A

The second outing for JSMB looked difficult from the start as they faced a 12-players Alabama squad with 5 blodgers and a +AG thrower. This was offset by Gloves of Holding placed on Blade Divac and a dirty trick that would be used later.

AAA starts with the ball which is placed in the hands of their agile thrower on the touchback. They start by sending players deep on both sides, but JMSB responds simply by holding the middle and sending Divac toward the thrower.

The amazons then attempt to setup a screen in front of catcher Bjartney Cabolus out of Bloater range, but she muffles the catch. Nurgle's minions converge toward the ball, but it's still wide open. On turn 3, Bjartney could just pick up and score, but a block on the line by blitzer Admete Coper turns double skull which costs a valuable re-roll. The poor catcher is left stranded on the sideline after a failing to pick up while the JMSB stadium DJ plays a premonitory rendition of Surfin' USA from The Beach Boys.

While the Bloaters can't still knock down anyone, they open up a small window for Terry Bradsaw to steal a page from Alabama's playbook and dodge in to knock Calobus into the crowd. JSMB's fans being strong supporters of the #MeToo movement send her safely back to her dugout.

AAA makes some attempt to regain control of the ball, but by now the 6 players downfield are slighty overwhelmed by the 4 Bloaters and 2 Pestigors and they turn it over on a failed dodge attempt. It looks like JMSB will have a shot at the ball.

Cal Ripskin Jr. starts the fourth turn by pushing blitzer Elaine Wilner right where Bradsaw pushed her teammate a turn earlier. Bradsaw proceeds to blitz her as well in the crowd, this time it seems the #MeToo moment is over and Wilner turns up with what at first seemed like a fractured skull, but was actually a damaged back after a few Keystones with the apothecary. Completing his move, Bradsaw then picks up the ball and moves to assist Pavel Bury in knocking Danae Moon and pushing her on the sideline.

On the next turn, Fausta Tasus dodges in to tag Bury and Bradsaw with the ball. That gives one dice to Moon as she stands up from the sideline, knocks Bradsaw down and ends up with the ball in her hands. She can get to the end zone by dodging around Pavel Bury three times, two of those disadvantaged, but fails on the second one.

Cal Ripskin Jr. blitzes Fausta to free up Bury, who pushes toward the middle with Bradsaw covering him while tagging agile thrower Boudica Diloen and downed linewoman Alcippe Sabo. Fausta gets back up and assists Diloen in knocking down Bradsaw. Sabo gets up, knocks down Bury, gets a favorable bounce, picks up, goes for it, goes for it, SCORES!!! AAA pulls one out of its sexy ass. Coors Banquet is flowing freely as their fans rejoice.

JSMB receives the kick on turn 6, but Alabama gets perfect defense with the ball on the sideline two squares aways from scrimmage and just out of reach of Divac with his magic gloves. Double skulls on the fourth block aborts the turn before the pick-up attempt.

The only guy covering the ball, Gary Carver, then gets blitzed by Antistia Beac and knocked out. Beac is now tagging the ball along with Danae Moon while Diloen swoops in, picks up and attempts a deep pass that is fumbled in fumes emanating from the Coors Banquet kegs opened earlier.

Cal Ripskin Jr. blitzes the thrower who is pushed back on the ball, but it bounces right into the hands of Moon who was next to her. On the next turn, Baec gets an assist on Divac to free up Diloen, while Tasus charges for the end zone going for it twice. Diloen holds her breath receiving the hand off from Moon and then takes off for the endzone. She goes for it twice to get into quick pass range and Tasus makes the catch to make it 2-0.

JSMB gets the ball back with one turn to score and after lots of pushing Dale Hawerchoke takes out his frustration on Danae Moon striking her with an apparently lethal blow. The injury is later debunked when Moon is interviewed in the JMSB bleachers with fans numbing the pain away with excessive amount of O'keefe Ale, an infamous brew among masochist beer lovers.

As if JMSB's turmoil wasn't deep enough, second half starts with a blitz that ends up with blitzer Antiope Moushe catching the ball right next to Divac. However, he gets an assist from Die Young and he's able to knock Moushe down as the ball bounces backward. Bradsaw recovers it with the team moving back to protect him, while Bury heads downfield. Kevin Gurgi uses his dirty trick, a chop block that stuns Admete Coper on the line of scrimmage. The rest of the team moves to reinforce Bury's position on the following turn.

On the third turn, Cal Ripskin Jr. is fucking pissed off so he makes a statement the only way he knows by badly hurting Euryclea Polonius. That opens up the way for Michael Slay-Han to push Anaxilea Dante into the crowd, who is firmly back on the #MeToo train. Not wanting to be left out of this beautiful violence, Gary Carver strikes at substitute passer Antiope Shetra and sends her right to the recruitment office for JMSB, only after she was done sipping a delicious Molson Export to recover from the blow of course.

On the next turn, Carver picks up where he left off, this time breaking Antistia Beac's ribs. Now with four players off the field, the way for Bradsaw and his brigade opens up and he's able to score of the fifth turn, making it 2-1.

With the opposition now down to seven players, JMSB sets up aggressively with its four Bloaters on the line and the rest of the guys not far behind. AAA attacks the Bloaters, but they are quite stranded on the line of scrimmage. JMSB surrounds them while Bradsaw and Divac move to threaten Sabo and Diloen in the Alligators backfield.

The two remaining amazon blitzers, Moushe and Coper, manage to free up Cabolous to receive a pass from Diloen, but the stench emananting from what JSMB has been drinking on the sideline is too much and she drops the ball.

Burning a re-roll, Michael Slay-Han and Kevin Gurgi manage to clear the way for Bradsaw to pick up, but he fails and the ball ends up in Die Young's hands. Moushe dodges to assist Coper in knocking Young down as the ball bounces away next to Pavel Bury. Diloen goes for it to pick it up, but falls down and bounces the ball out of Coper's tackle zone and perfectly for Bury to pick up.

Pavel picks up, but uses a re-roll to do so. He goes for it to hand off to Divac, who charges for the end zone going for it, going for it and SCORES!
JMSB ties it up at the last moment on the 8th turn. O'Keefe Ale is now flowing everywhere JSMB fans can be seen.

A painful tie for the Alabama Aestheitcal Alligators who lost a thrower and a linewoman to limp into next game with two blitzers missing as well. Thanks to vithar7 for taking the abuse like a champ.”