“Another week, another team. The stands were populated by large numbers of aloof elves, silent and sneering instead of singing and cheering as the normal blood bowl fans do. The stromfels fans made up for it in retaliation, ny being louder, drunker and more violent than every. Unfortunately the elves had refused to share stands, and so had been given pitchside away from the ultras, nut not out of earshot. A new rhyme had been created to convey feeling...

"All elves seem to have massive ears,
and attract from us folk many lears,
their noses are large,
their egos in charge,
and sharks gonna cause many tears"

A group of people known for being blood thirsty cutthroats are hardly expected to be poets, and the vulgar peasntry of this limerick was a grave affront to the elves. Even so, they held their heads high (despite added nasal mass) and sedately clapped the two teams onto the field. The elves stood in all their finery, surveying the drooling sharks. The sharks, in return, stared back and grinned to reveal their dentures...

The stromfels chose to recieve in hope of causing some damage in the chrage forwards. Instead, the sharks failed abysmally to hurt anything and the elves were able to swarm in and steal the ball. The sharks promptly formed a scrum and played a game of whack an elf, freeing the ball each time only for elves to catch it over and over. One wild pirate injured an elf, and the claws knocked out a few but otherwise the punches were pillow fisted. Finally the ball popped loose and an enterprising lineman ran of with it, but too little too late. Bloodfin's Grief ended their half scoreless.

The second half looked bleak against a high elven offense. A short kick drew attention away from the ref emerging from the grief's stands covered in bruises, and the game played on. The elves secured the ball short of the line and caged up, bringing forwards the reserves they had to prevent a deep kick. The sharks smelt blood though and Sazur charged into the high elves catcher from behind, knocking her to the ground and without auick work from the med staff, nearly out. A quick boot failed to finish the job however, and the unfazed elves quickly swapped point of attack on the pitch and sent a runner up the far side.

Only an experienced journeyman prevented the execution in totality, and a Shark running at full pace was able to introduce the errant lino to the crowd. One burly spectator caught the ball and booted it up field into the elven half, to be pressured by the stromfels. An excellent tackle prevented another switch and the ball was quickly placed in an endzone, though pillow fisted weakness kept most of the elves back on the pitch. A quick score was prevented by a wall of sharky muscle, and the ship Bloodfin's Grief secured its first win. The defeated elves left the pitch quietly, whilst stromfel fans heckled them and threw beer cans.”