58 coaches online • Server time: 23:05
* * * Did you know? The most touchdowns in a single match is 23.
Log in
Recent Forum Topics goto Post Things we dislike of...goto Post DIBBL Awardsgoto Post NO Seasons! 2016 ski...
Scribbl 13 PressConf Rotfall Ironworks Rocketeers
Press Conference - Rotfall Ironworks Rocketeers
The Rotfall Ironworks press room is packed tight, the handful of non-skaven CIBBL reporters looking especially uncomfortable as they are forced to rub shoulders (and other more sensitive areas) with the dreadful smelling verminfolk. Dozens on dozens of squeaking voices chatter and shout as Greesh Nailbit, Skreevius Skabwerth, and Krakshot Neek settle into their seats at the conference table, along with Yeeuk Glintfang, the treasurer of the Rocketeers and deputy FCO of Rotfall Ironworks and coach King Mad. A heavy bell tolls, and the rabble quietens, though by any standard but skaven it is still quite a din. Greesh Nailbit, a respectably corpulent rat, makes a show of clearing his throat (freeing a nasty green gob of nuffle-knows-what to go flying straight into the audience) before addressing the crowd:

"We will now take-take queries from worthless press-things on upcoming spring regionals and Rocketeers plans to kill-score over rival clan-teams. Press-things are reminded that all paw-signed waivers on entry to press room subjecting selves to free experimental surgeries at discretion of moderator-slash-chief Ironworks engineer Skreevius Skabwerth, and are advised not to ask-ask stupid questions or face-face consequences."

As soon as Nailbit finished rattling off the dubious terms of the Q&A, the shrieking of the audience bursts back to life. It continues for a few moments, before Skreevius raises a wiry paw and points at an indeterminate spot in the crowd. One skaven reporter, no doubt certain he was the one indicated, roughly clambers up onto the shoulders and heads of his peers and addresses the table.

"Chatterchitter Chithering of the Rotfall Rarified Readers Register! Smart-smart minds want know if sad-pathetic performance of Mechavermin during championships give Ironworks thought-thoughts on effectiveness of Skreevius designs?"

An unintelligible noise escapes Skabwerth, but Greesh firmly puts a paw on his neck.

"Rotfall Ironworks and the Rocketeers have no whine-complaints about fine-fine quality Skabwerth designs and engineering. Rabid Rocket and pilot Chitt are lynchpin of Rocketeers, new additions of Iron Rat and Mark Three will prove strong-strong additions to team. Late Kreeyik-thing lasted full ten minutes of crowd-beating before stop-stop function. Testament to durability of Skryre designs."

Nailbit leans in close to Skreevius Skabwerth, who hisses angrily into his ear while gesturing at Chatterchitter. As Nailbit calls for the next question, Chatterchitter disappears from the room, hauled away by Rotfall Ironworks security.

"Skreekin Vittler of the Rarified Rotfall Readerships Register! Ask-question for team captain Krakshot Neek: can Neek break into best-best records for completions this year?"

Neek puffs his scrawny chest out, before pointing at an indeterminate point on the ceiling:

"Press-things thinking small-small! Unparalleled thrower Neek will reach top-top five completions and top-top three passing yards by snow fall! CIBBL record keepers make bad-awful mistake in not count-count vertical yardage as well as horizontal, or Neek would already be number one!"

As the assembled reporters hastily scratch the quote from Neek down, or at least some version that vaguely resembled it but would make for a more impressive headline, Skreevius indicates another skaven to field a question.

"Quiverkin Gnawbit of the Rarely Readable Rotfall Review! Which rival-team in Skavenblight regionals is worst-worst threat to Rocketeers this time?"

The coach of the Rocketeers finally speaks up.

"We've seen a lot of teams come and go in Skavenblight in the two years since our team joined CIBBL. There's also been a fair amount of shake-ups in the team compositions accepted by the CIBBL commission for some of the skaven clan teams - the Skavenblight of this year looks quite different from lasts. We look forward to welcoming another new Moulder and orthodox Skaven team to the region, as well as our longest standing rival teams the Deluge Bearers and Fangsnapper's Clawpack. In regards to the latter, their brutal playstyle augmented by the addition of the elite Red Guard of Mors will require a similar response on the part of the Rocketeers. That said, we have been quick to comply with the aforementioned changes to accepted team composition, while the Clawpack have enjoyed the best of both worlds on a technicality. Thrower Duskdigger is a respected veteran player, but he has had his time on the pitch, and if the Clawpack will not have him withdraw with grace, the Rocketeers will aim to have him retired from more than just a sport. Thank you."

Greesh stands and shakes King Mad's hand, and addresses the crowd.

"That will be all the money-time we have to answer questions today. Yeeuk Glintfang will hold following session for press-things concerned with Rotfall Ironworks investors and Rocketeer sponsors."

As the representatives, save Glintfang, stand from the table and retreat from the room, the bell tolls once more to indicate the end of the conference. As the sports reporters try to exit the room, they are pushed back and nearly trampled by a new swarm of financial reporters crowding in through the doors.