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Scribbl 13 Delusionals 1
Preposterous Paper n 4
Official Dreadpeak's Delusionals Fanzine
As you all know, the Delusionals suck.
We finished the Youngblood tournament in the last spot and didn't achieve anything.
Well, coach Frak is gone and the team is after a new coach to lead them to more important matches in winter!
And so that's the idea, captain Klavlak led some players in order to interview other coaches to offer the job! And this is how it went...

First interview to coach Krugg Dirtfang of the Sabre Mountain Rattlers.
We found him on the top of a pile of bones and dirt, going in and out with his finger in his big nose digging brown stuff known as snot.

Klavlak (mushroom addict): Well Coach, tell us about your strategies... if you have some...

Krugg Dirtfang: I coached Shakers and they know best way win is hit other team til stop doing things. My plan with all teams I coach is tell them do same, why wait to be punch when you can do punch.

Strigsits Phart (regular idiot but injured with AV6, clearly scared about been killed): Talking about punches... How much do you care for your own players safety?

Krugg Dirtfang: Hahaha you ask funny things. Players play to give glory to Great Maw. If they take a hit while serving Maw then they are doing good work but if they are weak enough to be injured that does not bring glory and makes me sad and hungry.

Klavlak (clearly hungry because of highness): this maw you are talking about... well is it good to eat? we are a bit hungry

Krugg Dirtfang: You no joke about eating Great Maw. Maw is strong like the ogre but has power more than the ogre too. Maw is why play blood bowl, honour Maw so Maw know we honour Maw. No eat, silly green dwarf.

Goongol Nonose (troll): Do you like Daisies?

Krugg Dirtfang: Ha Krugg think daisies look good when they have knocked out player next to them ha. Kruger doesn't spend time looking down at things under feet, they not impact on Krugg

(This probably contributed to Krugg's previous team's high snotling turnover)

Klavlak (mushroom addict): What's your opinion on going on the pitch totally high with mushrooms?
Krugg Dirtfang: What say? Krugg not know what you mean?

Klavlak: welll... you know (blink) when you eat mushrooms and... see strange colours all around, monsters and stuff

Krugg: Yes Krugg eat things that make him feel like that. Sometimes he wants to eat more, sometimes he want sleep or sometimes he want stay awake forever talk with other ogre about how small and with no meaning we are. That same thing?

Klavlak: what's your favourite colour when you are high?

Krugg: Sometimes when I take team on run to top of mountain I see shade of grey come from top of mountain. This colour is nice and make me happy.

Goongol Nonose (troll): I like daisies

Krugg: Why you like daisy?

Goongol Nonose: Huuuuh?

Klavlak: ok ok are you ok of being paid in snotling currency?

Krugg: You give me snotling if I make your team good? I have lots of snotling already. I no need more snotling. Want to be with your team so can get away from snotling. They no play good, they no taste good, they no good for things

Klavlak: we'll let you know.. one last thing.... if you will train our team what can you promise at our fans?

Krugg: Power, glory and fame. If you want score goal you hire pointy ear coach. If you want be the best you hire Krugg!

Klavlak: nice to meet you krugg, fancy a mushroom?

Krugg: Yes it is big ogre feast day today so Krugg let his hair down chomp Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiit

Skip ahead to part 2 here