First, i want to thank SneakyFox for sharing his insights in the last issue of the Grotty Little Newspaper on coaches psychology. However, during my research i found some different results and would like to share them, so we can start a fruitful dialogue.
My first take would be on dwarfes:
My fellow academics and i had a group of one hundred dwarf coaches in the lab, and here is the thing: we thought at first, that they were the woodelf test group! your common dwarf coach is not bearded (95%), not smelling too bad (71% are not in the red scale of the odo-meter) and not small (1,87m avg). We made a couple of different tests (from big five to some standardised questionaires and some physical tests) and found the following:
68% have an above average IQ
91% are typical "anal stage" in the freudian system
82% fail to grow a spotless beard
92% prefer non-complex action movies to sensible drama or experimental films - despite the fact that they understand them
11% state that they follow some sort of religion
50% say that there is something wrong with politicians nowadays
99% prefer a game of chess to gardening
92% never wielded an axe to chop wood more than once

what does that show?
your average dwarf coach is actually a guy that has all the characteristics that a dwarf has not. he is intelligent and of decent height, likes the feeling of power by wielding an axe but finds it uncomfortable to do so at the same time. he feels excrement as a sign of power while knowing that it's not and follows an atheist worldview with ambivalence to politics as it does not provide "easy entertainment". a great deal of dwarf coaches feel a lack of manliness due to not being able to grow a proper beard which they possibly transition to their team: longbeards are preferred to blitzers (whose beards are less obvious to see) by the coaches that can't grow a proper beard, whereas the other 18% don't care for the hair-factor. One might think, that as a dwarf coach doesn't like gardening there is a parallel to the dwarf - but that doesn't take into account that a big part of gardening has to do with tearing plants apart and cutting trees, a practise that dwarfs, as suggested by literature, do enjoy indeed.
we at CP-Labs come to the conclusion that the average dwarf coach is indeed trying to compensate his lack of manliness through playing a team of dwarfs and destroying other teams (while symbolically destroying the hated part of themselves thereby). SneakyFox had some things right: they do enjoy toilet humor (it's the one thing they can emotionally grasp)!