MrCushtie
Joined: Aug 10, 2018
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 04:39 |
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So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy
What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.
Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.
If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?
Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion? |
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Nelphine
Joined: Apr 01, 2011
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 04:56 |
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guard is onthe rat ogre so that he can frenzy AND the frenzied gutter runner next to him canfrenzy! |
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Arktoris
Joined: Feb 16, 2004
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 05:06 |
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Guard is the designated driver.
Guard is the Robin to frenzy's Batman. Together, they are the dynamic duo. |
_________________ Hail to Manowar! The latest charioteer to DIE for bloodbowl! - Slain, by Ghor Oggaz |
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Rbthma
Joined: Jan 14, 2009
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 05:07 |
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I not only put guard on the Rogre, but also the gutters when I can ^-^
I'm not sure why you are complaining about guard on a Rogre as Skaven are better without the damn thing 75% of the time. Rogre is the fun option.
edit: the even more fun option is to make a mini-Rogre and keep both! |
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fidius
Joined: Jun 17, 2011
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 05:53 |
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MrCushtie wrote: | So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy
What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.
Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.
If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?
Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion? |
QFT |
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ArrestedDevelopment
Joined: Sep 14, 2015
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 07:40 |
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Kudos Cushtie, this is one of the funniest threads I've seen in ages.
Purplechest is probably sitting outside the Basilica with his emulsion right now. |
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Grod
Joined: Sep 30, 2003
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 08:30 |
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Awesome post - funny stuff! |
_________________ I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
Oscar Wilde |
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Joost
Joined: Mar 17, 2014
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 09:04 |
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MrCushtie wrote: | So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy
What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.
Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.
If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?
Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion? |
You are of course entirely correct! I will check in to rehab to see if I can shake my Guard addiction. And I'll have to try cornflakes with Budweiser for breakfast now I guess... *shudders*. |
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harvestmouse
Joined: May 13, 2007
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 10:01 |
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Guard can also be the trickster. A side step guard who makes that 2D a 1D. 'so he's an easy POW is he?'.
I like this aspect in a player. Now he is the Joker to Batman's frenzy. |
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Seventyone
Joined: Dec 02, 2010
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 12:06 |
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To make an analogy with Red Dwarf and better than life in particular.
Guard is Helen: reliable,dependable, but a little boring and a dark secret:she's actually your mother.
Frenzy is Juanita: exotic, exciting, keen on lacy underwear but will let you down in a crisis and sleep with pretty much anyone |
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Mattius
Joined: Sep 03, 2006
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 13:01 |
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MrCushtie wrote: | So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy
What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.
Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.
If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?
Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion? |
This is simply my favorite post ever. |
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Jim_Fear
Joined: May 02, 2014
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 14:15 |
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Much like drinking and driving, kids, don't drink and forum post. Or if you do, make sure it's funny like this one. |
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PaddyMick
Joined: Jan 03, 2012
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  Posted:
Aug 18, 2019 - 23:25 |
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thinly veiled ive got a wife brag |
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DrClaes
Joined: Mar 16, 2018
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  Posted:
Sep 01, 2019 - 15:37 |
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Good point and good write-up MrCushtie!
I highly recommend you try your hands at the Slayer team in Secret League, also known as "How I stopped worrying and learned to love the Frenzy". Or play Khorne, all the frenzy all the time. |
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harvestmouse
Joined: May 13, 2007
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  Posted:
Sep 01, 2019 - 17:25 |
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Wait.......MrCushtie and DrClaes are different people?! |
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