14 coaches online • Server time: 07:10
Index Search Usergroups Profile
Log in
Recent Forum Topics goto Post Are U Ready 2 Leave?...goto Post Fill the BOX grid !goto Post Dornbirn World Cup -...
SearchSearch 
Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic Log in to check your private messages View next topic
MrCushtie



Joined: Aug 10, 2018

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 04:39 Reply with quote Back to top

So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy

What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.

Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.

If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?

Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion?

_________________
Image
Nelphine



Joined: Apr 01, 2011

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 04:56 Reply with quote Back to top

guard is onthe rat ogre so that he can frenzy AND the frenzied gutter runner next to him canfrenzy!
Arktoris



Joined: Feb 16, 2004

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 05:06 Reply with quote Back to top

Guard is the designated driver.

Guard is the Robin to frenzy's Batman. Together, they are the dynamic duo.

_________________
Hail to Frik! The latest charioteer to DIE for bloodbowl! - Slain, by Raiders of the Lost Tomb
Rbthma



Joined: Jan 14, 2009

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 05:07 Reply with quote Back to top

I not only put guard on the Rogre, but also the gutters when I can ^-^

I'm not sure why you are complaining about guard on a Rogre as Skaven are better without the damn thing 75% of the time. Rogre is the fun option.

edit: the even more fun option is to make a mini-Rogre and keep both!

_________________
Image
fidius



Joined: Jun 17, 2011

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 05:53 Reply with quote Back to top

MrCushtie wrote:
So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy

What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.

Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.

If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?

Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion?

QFT
ArrestedDevelopment



Joined: Sep 14, 2015

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 07:40 Reply with quote Back to top

Kudos Cushtie, this is one of the funniest threads I've seen in ages.

Purplechest is probably sitting outside the Basilica with his emulsion right now.

_________________
Image
Grod



Joined: Sep 30, 2003

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 08:30 Reply with quote Back to top

Awesome post - funny stuff!

_________________
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

Oscar Wilde
Joost



Joined: Mar 17, 2014

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 09:04 Reply with quote Back to top

MrCushtie wrote:
So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy

What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.

Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.

If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?

Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion?


You are of course entirely correct! I will check in to rehab to see if I can shake my Guard addiction. And I'll have to try cornflakes with Budweiser for breakfast now I guess... *shudders*.
harvestmouse



Joined: May 13, 2007

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 10:01 Reply with quote Back to top

Guard can also be the trickster. A side step guard who makes that 2D a 1D. 'so he's an easy POW is he?'.

I like this aspect in a player. Now he is the Joker to Batman's frenzy.
Seventyone



Joined: Dec 02, 2010

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 12:06 Reply with quote Back to top

To make an analogy with Red Dwarf and better than life in particular.

Guard is Helen: reliable,dependable, but a little boring and a dark secret:she's actually your mother.

Frenzy is Juanita: exotic, exciting, keen on lacy underwear but will let you down in a crisis and sleep with pretty much anyone

_________________
Image
Mattius



Joined: Sep 03, 2006

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 13:01 Reply with quote Back to top

MrCushtie wrote:
So I played a few games today, and got to thinking, and then I had a pint of fine wine and so much beef I got the meat sweats and my wife had to help me walk home. But I was struck by a revelation, an epiphany you might say about two skills that are the polar opposite of one anoyher: Guard and Frenzy

What's the point of Guard? It's an awful skill, it's like Illegal Procedure every single turn, it's the skill you'd have if you had no redeeming features of your own and the only reason people invited you to parties was because you could borrow your parents' car. Choosing Guard is choosing to be miserable, it's loving saying "I told you so", it's for people who get off on playing Sudoku, it's an alphabetically organised sock drawer, it's about as much fun as a boiled broccoli enema without the vitamins.

Now Frenzy, on the other hand, that's a skill that says "hold my beer and watch this! ". It's the drunken uncle of skills, the one that drives a 1973 Cutlass V8 with purple naugahyde seats and gold paint and doesn't *go* to parties because it *brings* the party that rocks the party. Frenzy is the smell of Budweiser on cornflakes, it's the sound of happiness, it's the skill everyone wants to have and if they don't want to have it, then they shouldn't be your friends.

If somebody asks you what skill you should take, you should take Frenzy. If you can't take Frenzy, sack the player.. If you've already got Frenzy, why are you even asking?

Given that, what kind of terrible, twisted person puts Guard on a Rat Ogre? Are they doing this to relax for a moment before popping down to the Sistine Chapel to brighten it up with some white emulsion?


This is simply my favorite post ever.
Jim_Fear



Joined: May 02, 2014

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 14:15 Reply with quote Back to top

Much like drinking and driving, kids, don't drink and forum post. Or if you do, make sure it's funny like this one.
PaddyMick



Joined: Jan 03, 2012

Post   Posted: Aug 18, 2019 - 23:25 Reply with quote Back to top

thinly veiled ive got a wife brag
DrClaes



Joined: Mar 16, 2018

Post   Posted: Sep 01, 2019 - 15:37 Reply with quote Back to top

Good point and good write-up MrCushtie!

I highly recommend you try your hands at the Slayer team in Secret League, also known as "How I stopped worrying and learned to love the Frenzy". Or play Khorne, all the frenzy all the time.
harvestmouse



Joined: May 13, 2007

Post   Posted: Sep 01, 2019 - 17:25 Reply with quote Back to top

Wait.......MrCushtie and DrClaes are different people?!
Display posts from previous:     
 Jump to:   
All times are GMT + 1 Hour
Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic Log in to check your private messages View next topic