Ok - this is a true story. A friend of mine was working behind the counter in a chemist. A blonde woman comes in and asks where she can get some rectal deodorant. My friend was a bit surprised but told her that they didn't carry that product and never had. She assured him she had bought it there previously, so he asked her if she still had the bottle it came in.

She showed him a plastic bottle of underarm deodorant, with clearly written instructions:

"To use, push up bottom"