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jevouse



Joined: Sep 12, 2014

Post   Posted: Jun 15, 2017 - 08:18 Reply with quote Back to top

The Wolf's Howl Issue 16 - Preseason Preview
by who-you-know

With the Wolfpack bidding farewell to Kaptan Artur, Theophilus, Karl Heinz, Wulfric and George, all of whom leave for the pro leagues where they are highly sought after, the team is highly weakened with the addition of 5 freshmen (3 positionals) who have yet to show their abilities on the field, but young Bruno and swarthy Siegfried have looked good in training. We are confident that the new Kaptan Elric will still lead the team to success with the training and guidance of our renowned coach.

Ulric has girt us for battle once again as we face the mighty Bulls in our first match of the touring leg. We hope for a good honest battle and a hard fought victory, but most of all, for our rookies to turn out warriors on the field.

_________________
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La grande peur des bien-pensants. The end of an age...the beginning of another.
ramchop



Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 15, 2017 - 11:23 Reply with quote Back to top

Miragliano Standard

Diavoli Devastated

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New Tilea Players: Zita Pisciotta and Dante Karlsson

The Diavoli have been left decimated after the mostly rookie team lost their two most gifted senior players, both killed by Altdorf Griffins. Only two players remain who have played more than a single game for the Diavoli, and what does Remo do? Instead of taking proven senior players from the Tilea Cup, he recruits two more juniors. A press conference was held by Assistant Coach Mila Fiore Pisciotta, Captain Matteo Fugazzi, and Apothecary Drago Mancini to explain.

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Press: Captain Matteo, do you have anything to say about the deaths of your team mates?

Matteo: Well, err..

Mila: Let me answer this one Arp Arp dear. The Imperial Scum! <spit>. They are disgusting! Look at them in their shiny Reeborc <spit> armour. They have the gall to say we can't wear Tila? If Reeborc wish to be the official uniform supplier, then supply everyone equally. Favoritism <spit>, strong armour for the Imperial Scum <spit> weak for the rest? We shall continue to wear Tila with pride. If those bastards <spit> kick us out of the CBBA for standing up against this injustice well...

Matteo: Yes <spit>

Press: What can you tell us about the new Elf, Zita. I believe she's one of yours Mila?

Mila: My Zita, my youngest, she's a darling.

Press: But can she play?

Mila: Sexist! Of course she can play. You complain when we don't select Tilea Cup seniors. Zita has played Pro Bowl, in the Pirate League. Only for half a year mind, then she decided to follow in her brothers' footsteps and get an education.

Press: And she's half Elf?

Mila: Elf, Vampire, you and your need to categorise. She is Sartosi, she is Tilean, what else matters?

Press: And the father?

Mila: Next question.

Press: Her nickname is unusual, Banjo?

Mila: Aha,yes well that's not her real nickname, it's $%#@................ haha, look at the shock on your faces. You mainlanders are such prudes.

Press: And what of this new norseman? We hear odd things about him.

Drago: Dante Karlsson is one of my students. He is in mourning after the sad loss of his brother Dino.

Press: Brother? His biography states he is 3 years younger, but apart from a nasty scar on his face he's the spitting image of Dino. There is a protester from the church outside saying you're dabbling in the occult. He claims Dante is Dino!

Drago: Yes, the Diavoli attract some odd fans.

Press: Dante does smell a bit off.

Drago: Those from the far north have never been known for their good personal hygiene.

Press: There are claims Dante cannot even speak, let alone read.

Drago: As I said, Dante is in mourning. He shall do his speaking on the field.
Faulcon



Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Post   Posted: Jun 16, 2017 - 09:40 Reply with quote Back to top

Asked for this thoughts on the coming season, coach Faulcon only had the following to say:

a nenw season and a bunch jof orookies, what could possibly go wrong mfor the busll this time round? well, at letsa richolf is still here ancd there are still plenty of kges tgo go round.
Wozzaa



Joined: Apr 23, 2016

Post   Posted: Jun 17, 2017 - 11:08 Reply with quote Back to top

Player Profile:Sham 'Cleaver' Cleats

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Sham is a new member of the Mootland Fighting Cockerels, and has impressed in his first two games. His team mates have unfortunately failed to show up.

Sham has become a crowd favourite, felling foes much bigger than himself. Some have questioned why he takes his cleaver onto the pitch, but generally the fans have enjoyed his expertise with the knife.

In two games he has removed four players from the pitch, and felled several others with his expert cutting skills. All foes are left with his trademark 'heart'. A tribute to his daughter, who attends every game.

How many more will feel the edge of Sham's cleaver?
Patdragon



Joined: May 04, 2016

Post   Posted: Jun 17, 2017 - 19:40 Reply with quote Back to top

Scope on the Scorpions

Player Focus-

Name: Friseur Atzwig
Position/number: Linesman/8
Height: 6'2
Weight:220
Age:18
Born: Jettenberg
Studying: Economics
Other interests: Music, fine cuisine, Those big dogs with all the hair.

Quote from most recent match
"We tried but we weren't ready for the stallions, that 2-0 loss should have been 1-0 at minimum"
mushoomy



Joined: Oct 18, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 18, 2017 - 03:08 Reply with quote Back to top

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Nordrak College Newsletter - Issue #3 - Inspection Day

With the game against the Talabheim Panthers just around the corner, an inspector from Talabecland came to the college to inspect whether or not Nordrak College partakes in chaotic rituals. In the case that something was found, the college team would be banned from the Collegiate Blood Bowl Association forever. We can gladly announce that nothing was found that was suspicious, meaning the game against the Talabheim Panthers on Monday at 7pm SWL will be played, as planned.

These were the notes taken by the inspector:

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Nordrak College Inspection:

- Chaotic books in the library were strictly fictional and for entertainment.

- Pedestals and Chaotic ornaments were props for their upcoming Wolfspeare production.

- Sacrifice Wanted poster was merely asking for someone to play the sacrifice in the production.

- Jars of blood were not blood, but rather the region's speciality sauce; tastes salty, and a bit like iron.

- The guts on a table were not human guts, but pig guts from the region's butcher.

- BBQ Human on the college's cafeteria menu, tasted like chicken and was delicious

- A student found with very long legs was just a student with very long legs.

- A student found with claws explained that it was just special effects makeup.

- A student found with a foul appearance was just ugly.

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See you all in the benches on Monday to support our amazing team! Wolfspeare club is this Wednesday. Bring a friend and a knife!
HandyKaufman



Joined: Jan 08, 2017

Post   Posted: Jun 18, 2017 - 15:34 Reply with quote Back to top

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Dean Visits Panther Locker Room.

TU Tribute

Panthers Beat Writer: Jorje Getwald pre-game newswire



In the Talabheim season opener The Dean impressed his will on coach HandyK. Keeping to his promise the Dean ran down the academic standing of the Black Lantern boys. Especially "Ratholer".

The Dean stopped by the press box for a pre-game interview.

When asked why he had an eye on Ratholder.

"That boy can't speak with comprehension!" Dean answered "He has the physique of a grown man and is obviously a Natural at the game, but I'm worried about his marks..."

Is Ratholder going to be allowed to play the match?

"I'll let him play this one match and see if he can impress me."

Coach HandyK was quoted after the game "I was impressed with the team's debut."

"Ratholder takes two academic pins for 1 RIP and 1 CAS" Said Coach K "He certainly impressed the Dean."

It wasn't all sunshine for the defensive player of the game.

"Cornelius Gathered up three Academic pins with an INT" Coach K. "He also had a TD, Shame he had to suffer a Smashed Hip we'll need him against that ST 4 elf on the Manticores."

The Eagles had better offensive numbers.

"The Eagles really should have won this match their offenise line is impressive with 2 COMP and 50+ rushing yards, They just fumbled it on the endzone and it went south from there.. We got lucky."

He also remains optimistic about the Black Lantern boys.

"We lost Ottilia.." Coach K "He gave it up for the win though.."

"He RIP'd in front of the Dean..." Said Tronly Trodespark. "I want to RIP in front of the Dean.."

With the Manticores in the next match and down Cornelius Liebstedre Coach K was gleaming about his prospects. "I hear some of those Manticores are mutated freaks that worship some chaotic nonsense... Well meet my new lino Leroy "Dog Face" Ulric... And they don't call him that because he is the son of a City Watchman... No... Look at his face. Poor kid looks like a mutt terry poodle."
mushoomy



Joined: Oct 18, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 19, 2017 - 12:33 Reply with quote Back to top

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Nordrak College Newsletter - Issue #4 - Goodbye Shylock

---

This issue is dedicated to the lineman, David "Shylock" Seckbach. The Nordrak College Manticores also dedicate their 2-1 win over the Talabheim Panthers to the late-deceased student.

---

The players ran onto the field; both teams still joyous from their previous wins. One of those players was David Seckbach; known as Shylock to his peers. As the team got into position, David saw a rather sad looking student on the line of scrimmage; though, he looked more like a skeleton. Thinking he could weasel in a deal with the sad #6, David went to the player and spoke with him.

---

Shylock: "Hey, why are you so sad?"

Tonly: "I want to die"

Shylock: "Cool, I'll kill ya if I get something out of it!"

Tonly: "I'll give you my kicking boots. They're a little heavy (like my soul), but a good foul should do the trick"

Shylock: "Sweet! These are sick! *Puts on kicking boots*"

---

And the whistle blew! Theodor "Titus" Ehmann smacked Tonly to the ground for Shylock to kill with his boots. Down came the boot, and the ref booted Shylock off the field. Shylock was not happy with the ref, as the deal was that he would be able to be the honourable player to put Tonly out of his misery.

---

Shylock: "REF!!! He asked me to do it!!! My parents will be hearing about this... How much do you want?*"

So Shylock paid the ref a sum of money, and sat down onto the bench without penalty. When we interviewed Shylock about the turn 1 foul, he said:

Shylock: "I'll die before one of my deals fail to be made"

---

And Nuffle definitely heard him through the P.A system. The clock struck turn 8 of the second half, and Shylock had failed to carry out his deal. Talabheim player Alfonzo Feuerbach stared into Shylock's soul with the eyes of Nuffle, and knocked his soul right out. Not even Nordraks finest apothecary could save Shylock from the wrath of Nuffle.

---

Rest in peace David "Shylock" Seckbach. Although Arthur "Antonio" Schellscheidt may be celebrating your death, the college will miss your fine economic skills and your family's large, monthly donations to the school... mainly the latter.
Tomay



Joined: Apr 26, 2008

Post   Posted: Jun 22, 2017 - 10:44 Reply with quote Back to top

Griffins Ready For "Boring" Wolfpack
Debby Demonbreeder – Sports Reporter for the Altdorf Daily

Captain Karl was at it again this evening ahead of the round 2 clash between the Griffins and Wolfpack. When asked what he thought of the Griffin's upcoming opponent, Karl labelled them as "the most boring team in the competition. They're well drilled but I always fall asleep by half time when they play."

It promises to be an exciting matchup between two successful teams from the biggest cities of the Empire.

_________________
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Join now and "Create a Legend"
Patdragon



Joined: May 04, 2016

Post   Posted: Jun 24, 2017 - 14:47 Reply with quote Back to top

Scope on the Scorpions

Player Focus-

Name: Wolfker Schenkmann
Position/number: 3
Height: 6'1
Weight: 290
Age: 19
Born: Wheburg
Studying: Geology
Interests: Rocks, Rock music, Rocker chicks, Candy crushing.

Quote from most recent match
"We may not have won vs the Outlaws, but I certainly may have ruin their season by killing their star player"
mushoomy



Joined: Oct 18, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 25, 2017 - 01:42 Reply with quote Back to top

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Nordrak College Newsletter - Issue #5 - The Chants of the Manticores

As the win streak of the Manticores increases, so do the fans that come to watch them play. People from all around the Old World come to watch the fresh Manticore side play. However, the new fans don't know the famous Manticore chants. Because of this, we have dedicated this issue of the NCN to teaching the new fans "The Chants of the Manticores".

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The Basic Chant
Chant this whenever you like:

Manticores
*Clap Clap Clap*
Manticores
*Clap Clap Clap*
Manticores
*Clap Clap Clap*
Manticores
*Clap Clap Clap*


The Chant of Encouragement
Chant this to encourage the Manticores:

Let's go Manticores, let's go
*Clap Clap*
Let's go Manticores, let's go
*Clap Clap*
Let's go Manticores, let's go
*Clap Clap*
Let's go Manticores, let's go
*Clap Clap*


The Chant of Reason
Chant this when something goes against us

BOOOOOOOOOO!!!
BOOOOOOOOOO!!!


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There are more advanced chants in the Manticore Chant Guide. You can buy this for $20 before any game. We suggest you purchase one before the Manticores face off against the ALU Great Eagles. This is the last game for this season's touring leg so make sure you come down to see if the Manticores can make 3 for 3.
DrPoods



Joined: Nov 14, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 25, 2017 - 03:34 Reply with quote Back to top

@ClippersOfficial
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- Athletic Department Statement -

Gefeliciteerd met de jonge Clippers-zijde voor hun prestaties. Een vroege overwinning in hun herbouwfase is zeer bemoedigend.

#ClippersSetSail #GloryDays #ImperialLapdogs

______________________________
*Congratulations to the young Clippers side for their performance. An early win in their rebuilding phase is very encouraging.*

_________________
"I gotta fever and the only prescription is MOAR COWBELL!!"
"That's right... shop smart: shop S-Mart... You got that?"
Sharper



Joined: Nov 22, 2006

Post   Posted: Jun 25, 2017 - 05:59 Reply with quote Back to top

@Buccaneers
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Coach Sharper is denying rumours that the Buccaneers have no chance to win against the Scorpions in their next game.
"We're a young team, and it will be a challenge without them, but i have faith in the team" Coach Sharper said in response to Diederik and Tor missing the Scorpions game with Injury.
"We are a developing team, and it will take some time before we can run with the older bigger teams, but we still aim to be competitive. We're training hard, and the boys are learning well..." the Coach said, quashing any talk that he is not having any impact in his new position.
HandyKaufman



Joined: Jan 08, 2017

Post   Posted: Jun 26, 2017 - 12:38 Reply with quote Back to top

Player Focus: Tonly Todespark


TU Tribute

Panthers Beat Writer: Jorje Getwald evening edition


After going on a seemingly mindless fouling rampage in a 1-2 loss to the Manticores I decided to ask Tonly a few questions after the game.

Jorje: You had a good run there!

Tonly: Yeah! That was amazing wasn't it! Except the loss of course..

Jorje: Lets' talk about the loss later.. For now I want to ask you about that fouling streak! What it was the seventh fouyl before the Ref blew the whistle on you?

Tonly: No it was my third foul of the first half. Remember the ref blew the whistle just before half time. I came up short on a wicked gang foul on "Othello" Adler.

Jorje: Ok... Yeah I was surprised to see you line up back on the pitch for the second half.

Tonly: So was I! I was dressing down when Lorenzo from the Black Lantern burst into the locker room. He said that the ref been "persuaded" to allow me to enter the game.

Jorje: Lorenzo has game access to the Panther's locker room?

Tonly: Oh sure! He is a major part of the coaching staff! and the CBBA referees union pays their dues at the Black Lantern too!... I thought everyone knew that?

Jorje: I have more questions for you after the game about Lorenzo.. Still an amazing streak of fouls. You know you were one shy of the school records for most fouls without being caught?

Tonly: No way!?

Jorje: In a stroke of strange coincidence it was a in a match nearly 150 years ago in which a well known, to you, halfing set the record at 8.

Tonly: Halfing? on the Panthers? I know halflings?

Jorje: You worked with him at the Black Lantern before being recruited by coach HandyK

Tonly: Oistterloin "Cajun Spice" Freyedffissherman!!!???

Jorje: Yes he was hired as a free "booter" and in his cameo appearance on the Panthers roster managed to eek out 5 RIPs an two perenant injuries in a famed match against the FCU Clippers.

Tonly: Awesome "Cajun Spice" is a BEAST! Don't we play the Clippers in our next match?

Jorje: Sure do Tonly!

Tonly: I have been hitting the books lately.. Maybe the Dean will let me play.

Jorje: Got any plans for the Manticores?

Tonly: It would be nice to die!
Wex



Joined: Apr 21, 2015

Post   Posted: Jun 28, 2017 - 09:58 Reply with quote Back to top

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Having been beaten by the Panthers and the Clippers is a great loss for the Eagles. Whispers tell us that current discussions within the Board favours taking a look at Coach Wex's resume again.

Athel Loren will soar again.

#SoaringEagles #AthelLorenLeaflet #CoachWex
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