DER DATE WIV DESTINY!

BADLANDS COMMUNITY SWAMP (AP) - Coach Zed and Coach Liquidorange watched with great interest last evening as Der Green Tide took home just the third victory in the team's short history. At the outset it seemed as though it might be a pitched battle, but the halflings of the Doomed Diners were lackluster at best in their performance.

"It's an embarrassment!" exclaimed Coach Zed. "The years of work I put into overcoming the prejudices faced by the halfling race? The countless hours of coaching Left My Heart in San Francisco - erased in the span of an afternoon. It's enough to make a man turn to the loving embrace of a treeman for consolation."

Time and time again Der Green Tide pounced on the spiked ball and made a mockery of the Doomed Diners' defense. There was nowhere to hide for the fur-footed opponents and they were taken to task by the seemingly endless onslaught of The Great Gobbo's minions.

"It is amazing how those little green buggers swarm their opponents," remarked Coach Liquidorange. "They are relentless in their ability to hound a ballcarrier, though they lack the punch of some of the more traditional teams."

As the whistle sounded the culmination of a glorious 4-1 triumph The Great Gobbo was carried off the field on the shoulders of his players, basking in the raucous cheers of the assembled goblin masses. Time will tell if this victory indicates a change in what has been a decisively negative trend in the trajectory of the goblins, or if they will revert to their role of lovable losers on the Bloodbowl circuit.