We’re lucky enough to be in the midst of the biggest online tournament of the year. The FUMBBL Cup is ticking along, and a great time seems to be being had by all. Curiously, Autumn is also home to the biggest tabletop BB events. This year, on the weekend of the 26th and 27th of October, the eyes of Europe will be locked in and focussed on Vienna, Austria for the Eurobowl.

I blogged a thing what I wrote on last year’s Eurobowl, but if clicking a mouse button is too much effort (and frankly, it is. I often find blinking is something evolution should have dealt with years ago. All of that precious calorie wasteage on moving two flaps of skin? Rubbish. I’ll never get fat and stay warm this winter keeping my eyeballs moist), the Eurobowl is essentially an 8 man team event, with each nation sending their representatives into battle to crown the European champions for that year. In 2010, the English were victorious, and last time out; the French went home with all the marbles (2011 was a World Cup year, so the Eurobowl has a year off).

In an effort to wrestle our trophy back from our Gallic chums in 2013 (they’re not unlike Asterix, all of them); the English took the dubious step of making me captain. The fools! This involved selecting 7 coaches from English TT BB to form our team with me, figuring out who is playing with what race, telling some good friends that they had not made the cut this year (really very hard work), sorting out shirts and spreading the Team England message / plastering propaganda everywhere to try and ensure future skippers have a pool of ready, willing and able Englishmen with which to compete.

I’m confident we have a team good enough to be there or there abouts (Joemanji, JimJimany, Lycos, Geggster, Pippy, Podfrey, Winkle_Picka and myself shouldn’t stink up the place too badly), but a record 17 other nations (!) sporting huge FUMBBL names (and some just as good coaches that you may not recognise if you aren’t a regular on the TT circuit, so I won’t list every coach from every team, but instead just give you a flavour of the type of quality we’re talking about here) will be slugging it out with us for the prize. The French (for example, Elyoukey, BiBi are among their 8) are the holders and have enormous strength in depth. Denmark (KFoged, Topper, Tripleskull, Neibling, Fischerking…) are the only side to have beaten England in 2 years, and they did it twice! Italy (La_Yena and friends) have a record level of Eurobowl wins, so expect them to be good. Germany (Flix, Kithor, Oventa, BudSpencer) are always trouble. Spain are resurgent (although not hugely au fait with FUMBBL, they have an amazing TT scene and great coaches). The Swiss (Jokaero, Strider84) could cause upsets. Finland, they’re always a worry (especially in the around the world drinking competition scheduled for the Sunday evening. Who will make it around? Finland, I wager. Who will pass out, destroyed? Me…). Sweden. The list goes on and on. There is also a singles side event, the EurOpen, where those that missed out will ply their trade. azzroag is a great example of a cracking coach in the hunt for that.

So – why am I telling you this? Well, because it’s going to be a titanic struggle on the field, and a huge excuse for a party and meeting up with some good BB friends off it. And, you can follow events as they happen! This year, Team England have installed a Twitter account (@TeamEnglandBB), and (WiFi permitting at the venue), we’ll be dropping up to the minute results into that there Interweb for those that couldn’t join us to keep their fingers on the pulse. If you’re really bored, follow the ebb and flow of tabletop’s big boy live. Or, you know, do something else, go outside, enjoy the sun, I don't know. But at least give us a follow. ;)

I’m also telling you this because you need to get stuck into tabletop. There really is no excuse not to. All of these guys are a pleasure to have a drink and a chat with, and this event, the Eurobowl, is really the pinnacle of a nerd holiday and a good time. I’d sell my mother to go. Well, your mother, but I’d take a hit on cost and overheads. Get stuck into your local Blood Bowl scene, contact your local NAF representative (ask me if you don’t know who that is, I’m sure I can help) and go to a local BB tournament. It’s your first step to Vienna, or Stockholm, or Cardiff, or Bruges, or wherever the 2014 event will be held (the hosting honour goes to the nation yet to host who finishes highest in the standings)!

I was once like you. A FUMBBLer only, a bit frightened of these weird nerds that moved hunks of lead around. 'But what if they infect me with their nerd juice', I thought? However, you’ll find they’re all actually a bit normal. If a social retard with a face like a smashed in door (aka me) can make the transition, so can you, you’re a better human than me. PM me, we’ll sort you out an event near you, someone who can (perhaps) lend you minis, a pitch or bits (in exchange for alcohol, most likely), the number of the local emergency services (for if it all gets too much for you), and the bank account with which you can reward me financially for the tremendous advice I’m giving you. I accept all good credit cards, and some rubbish ones as well.

So, there you have it. Go go England next week, and go go you – to your local NAF sanctioned Blood Bowl weekend!

Oh, by the way, if that happens to be Cambridge next month, do that. You know it makes sense. ;)